One of my better poems, even though it made me cry while writing it. Please, if you've gotten this far, Review.

The sign in sheet is empty

We are the first one here

My brother signs

The scribble is barely legible and I remember he's too young

To understand any of this

How I wish to be that young

I would not feel this gnawing in my chest

As if the hole she left in my heart is sucking in all the happiness

I cry every night as I remember

The happy times, the joy, then the sickness, and the goodbye

I remember the last hug

I went in for another and I'm so glad I did

Every night I called

Except the night she left

Halloween. I was out having fun as my grandma took her final breaths

The guilt gnaws at my heart as well

Leaving me empty

How am I supposed to face her knowing her eyes will never open

My dad guides me

I see her face

How is it she looks better dead than alive?

Full of life that will never belong to her, her cheeks are flushed

Hands are clasped at her sides

I touch them and they're so, so cold

People come and I'm supposed to share the sorrow with family

To make it easier to bear

But they're all dealing with their own pain

So why should I burden them more?

I stay silent

I can't look at her anymore without tearing up

Peaceful, beautiful, serene; the words are thrown all around

As if the words will chase away the loss in the room

The sorrow is just on the edge

People are trying not to cry

If I wasn't so young they would be bawling

I know I am on the inside

We are told to leave by the people in charge

I am relieved

I can't hold it in anymore

My bed has tear stains on it

I smudge them off, still trying to hide my feelings

My mom and dad didn't suspect anything

I'm called strong by the priest

If only he knew how weak I was on the inside

The funeral wasn't as bad as the viewing

At least this time I can pretend everything is all right

That's something I'm good at

We leave before the coffin is lowered

Still I cry sometimes

It's not as bad as it used to be

At least the pretending isn't

Remember to please review.