A/N: The ending is a bit vague, just as a warning. (And to Zyric, I didn't use any of your endings)


Liam got a room in the dingiest motel he could find.

One night.

That's all he needs. One night, and then he's done. One night and it's all over. He's playing a game of cat and mouse, but tonight he wants to be eaten.

He's done everything he possibly could to make sure he's found, save for leaving an actual trail.

His opponent did that once, left a trail of cocaine down the hall of a school. Liam thought that was extremely tacky.

And expensive.

Liam didn't have that kind of money. Jake did. That was annoying. That made not being killed ten times harder.

What they do has always been a game. A huge, expensive, and dangerous game. It started when they were just thirteen years old.

A threat.

And ever since then, they've been finding each other. Trying to kill each other.

But one always escapes.

They're equals in every way, save for money. They predict each other's moves, try to counter them, but then they counter the counters, and it can just go on forever.

But this time, Liam's not gonna fight back.

He just wants to talk.

He lies on the bed, trying not to imagine all the bugs and STDs that could be on the sheets, and listens to people fucking and girls propositioning.

It's a horribly filthy place. But Liam likes it, because he's holding onto a memory. The one time that Liam and Jake decided not to fight each other.

And they've been so obsessed with each other for so many years, that it's hard not to hold on to that night. That night where they were the only thing more passionate than enemies.

But being enemies lends a certain fire to everything they do. A heat, an intense feeling. One of the only intense feelings Liam's ever experienced.

He wants to tell Jake that maybe they don't have to do this.

Maybe this whole thing is stupid.

And if Jake doesn't agree, then Liam has a knife that he will hand to Jake, and that will be that. Liam's life hasn't really had a point other than Jake.

So he wants Jake to end it…with something pointy…

Okay, it sounded better in his head.

Liam has a brother that he never sees, but there's no love in that relationship. All he has to live for is Jake.

He's convincing himself that it isn't suicide if someone else stabs you. And if Jake talks to him, if Jake sees things the way Liam does, then all can be forgiven.

It only takes about a half an hour for Jake to show up. Liam left the door the tiniest bit open for him. No sense in breaking it down.

"Fixated, aren't we?" Jake asks, examining the place as he waltzes over to Liam.

"I just want to talk, okay?" Liam says.

Jake raises his eyebrows and spreads his arms. "Go on."

Liam hated how fucking beautiful Jake could be. "Well, you remember that one night, right?"

Jake narrows his eyes, crossing his arms and immediately getting defensive. Liam knows he doesn't like where this is going.

The expression is similar to that one time Liam decided to sic a prostitute on him. That was…fun. Watching him squirm was very amusing.

It wasn't quite as amusing when Jake shot her in the head with nothing more than a roll of his eyes.

"Yeah, I remember," Jake says, breaking eye contact with Liam. He seems ashamed of it, which disappoints Liam. "It's not going to happen again, if that's what this is about."

"No, it's not. It's just…I feel like I know you so well. I know where you hide, I know how your mind works, I know your body, I know you. But we've never really talked. Ten years of this, and I've never even said your name," Liam says, looking down at the knife under his right arm.

"I know you, too. You're not the only one who pays attention," Jake says.

"But I know you better than I know anyone else. I know you…Jake. And I love you," Liam says, meeting Jake's eyes as he says it. "I love you."

Jake looks shocked, he doubles over and takes deep breaths.

"And if you don't love me, you can kill me," Liam says, offering Jake the knife. It's actually Jake's knife, he threw it at Liam once and Liam just kept it.

"I…" Jake takes another breath. "Liam, I…oh, God, you…I've tried to kill you. And you love me?" He starts laughing hysterically. "You are one masochistic motherfucker, aren't you?"

"So…you don't…"

"Of course not! C'mon, man, that was one fucking night. One night. And it was nice. Does that make you feel better? It was a good night. But it doesn't mean…L, we were wasted. C'mon," Jake says, still laughing.

L.

He only called Liam that when they were kids. A slip, probably. Maybe Jake wants to go back.

"Yeah, I guess…I guess you're right," Liam says, trying not to cry. He doesn't know what he was expecting, but it was a bit nicer.

"And I can't kill you. Where would all the fun in my life go?" Jake asks.

Now Liam starts to cry, Jake's completely ruined everything right now. The only importance Liam has is to keep Jake's life interesting?

No.

That can't happen.

"Hey, if it makes you feel better," Jake says, then bends over and kisses Liam. It's less than a second, but it feels good, and it does make Liam feel a bit better. "I'll let you have a night, but then I'm after you again."

Jake turns to leave, and Liam yells after him to wait.

"I'll do it myself!" Liam yells. "I'll do it."

"Do what? Kill yourself. Right, okay. Go for it," Jake says, turning back around and rolling his eyes.

Liam raises the knife to his throat, pressing until he gets a bit of blood. It's sharp as hell, and is in the top twenty list of most painful things that he's ever felt.

He starts to draw it against his throat, but something's grabbing his hand and prying the knife out of it. Jake, Liam knows that by the strength of the grip.

Liam's eyes are closed, but he opens them. If Jake's going to be there he wants to die with his eyes open, so he'll have someone to close them.

The cut's halfway across his throat.

He doesn't have much time.

"No, Jesus, you motherfucking idiot," Jake says. "I didn't think you were…I didn't think you were actually gonna do it. You're braver than I give you credit for."

Liam feels himself fading, he just smiles weakly at Jake.

"Stop that," Jake says, shaking Liam. "No, don't…God, okay, you want the truth? I have been in love with you since I met you. And this…watching you grow up, watching your logic evolve…watching you outsmart me has been beautiful. And then we…that night. That was…okay. I love you. Now please don't die because I need you in my life. I wanna watch you grow more."

Liam smiles more widely. "Love you too," he mouths, unable to get sound out.

Jake chokes back a sob.

Liam's vision is fading to black, the last thing he feels is Jake's hand squeezing his own.

And then Liam falls back to the start, to play another game with Jake. It goes in endless circles.

But he never gets tired of it.


A/N: Feedback is appreciated!