"One dream, a man is somewhere at an endless desert, holding a spear. Clueless, he looked for shelter to protect himself from the heat and a pool of water to quench his thirst. Until, he noticed a man who's lying on the desert sand. The man with a spear approached the worn-out man. As the worn-out man look up to the man with a spear, the man with a spear was in shocked. In shock, he killed the worn-out man with the spear. Then, he ran in disbelief. He ran, and ran, and ran until he collapses, fracturing his ankle in the process. He reached for the sun for hope but only— saw a man, holding a spear. Then, he woke up."
[1st Day: Encounter and Identity]
It started like the usual day. Waking up, going dress-up— No, wait. Forget what I said. In short, today, my family and I are preparing to go-out and visit my long-related cousin whom I never met. What kind of visit, you say? It's a grave visit. I don't even know why my parents come-up with a grave visit all of a sudden. Maybe they don't have nothing to do because it's a holiday week, and they thought about something like, "Hey, let's go and visit someone's grave!" or something like that. Well, the scenario was like this. Yesterday, I was chatting to a friend of mine while doing my admin work. Then, my mother came in to my room and said,
Shinji, tomorrow will be going to visit your cousin's grave. So, make sure you don't have any plans, ok?" What!? So, with no objections or whatever, I was forced to come along. Anyways, as you didn't notice, we were almost at the cemetery to where my cousin's buried while I was doing the introduction. We came over by riding at my father's van. It was a 4-hour drive. Tiring but I don't mind. At least I got to listen to music while playing a game in my Portable. Again, you didn't notice. We already bought candles and a bouquet for my cousin. We walked inside the cemetery but, as soon as we walked inside, my mother's phone rang and she answered it,
"Hello? . . . Yes? . . . Really!? Ok! Sure! I'll be going there then! . . . See you later then." The call ended.
"Mom, what was that all about?" I asked.
"Oh, it's a party that my co-worker made. In fact, I'll be going now. So, here are the candles and the bouquet. Oh. And here's some money for your transportation. So, I'll be going now." As she handed me those that she had mentioned, she gone inside the vehicle and drove away. . . . Huh? You thought that my father was the one who drove us here? Nope. He didn't come with us. Irritating, isn't it? I sighed and continue walking. I looked for my cousin's grave— Wait. What was my cousin's name? I didn't ask for it. I better ask my mother. I picked up my phone. Then, as I gone and put my thoughts into words, my phone turned off, leaving a "no battery" sign. I suddenly snapped, saying,
"What!? Oh great! First, I was forced to visit my cousin whom I never met. Second, my parents didn't go as they have planned, leaving me as their substitute for their random idea. And third, my phone died on me!" I shouted the last sentence, as some heard my misfortune and looked at me with bewilderment. I walked as I don't care, depressed. Then, I noticed a tombstone which is not the same as to the other tombstones. To add, it's not in the cemetery. It's farther near at the cliff, and it's the only grave that I could see. I approached the only grave. I examined the grave but, there's nothing to inspect. There's no label of who lies beneath. I felt sympathy. I looked at the cemetery filled with candles and bouquets to most of their dead ones. Some even have portraits beside their tombstones! Classy. Anyways, I looked beyond the cliff. Beyond it, I saw a broad ocean with a sun at the horizon. I looked back again to the tombstone beside me. I stroke it, unintentionally. Maybe I pity this person. That's why my body reacted itself. You know what, why isn't there be a name written on someone's grave, as a reminder of who's grave? Tongue twister? Sadly, no! And to add, there are no candles or ever a single bouquet on the grave.
"Right." I lit the candles and put down the bouquet beside the grave. And since I don't have a pack of matchstick, I gone back to the cemetery and got to lit the candles to another candle that's already lit. I sat down and took my Portable. Luckily, there's still enough to kill time some time. Then, I shuffled my backpack for my headphones, as I followed,
"The name's Shinji Heisei. What's yours?" I asked with enthusiasm, wearing my headphones and starting the game. But, I know that there won't be any response. I lowered my head, feeling stupid. Well I'm very stupid, alright. But, few seconds later, a strong wind blew through my back. Then,
"Ah. My name? My name's Monoko Reisei~" Said the cheery voice.
"Monoko Reisei-chan, eh~?" Wait, huh!? I suddenly looked to my right. Then, I saw her. The strong wind continued to breeze. By the looks of it, she's like been there for some time now. She wears a short white polo and a black skirt. Her hair's black and tied in twin tails, and her eyes are white as well. She's looking at me with her back bended forward, and her hands on her back. She smiled at me and greeted me,
"It's nice to meet you, Shinji Heisei-kun~" My eyes widened. But, I bought my composure back for a second and replied back,
"S-sure." Then I gone back playing, as she looked at the game I was playing. Her eyes widened, as she pushed herself towards my back.
"Woah, is that what I think it is!?" She exclaimed.
"What?" I replied.
"That's Project Diva, right?" I paused the game and removed my headphones.
"Yeah. Do you play this game also?" I asked, switching my game to soundtracks.
"Yep. A friend of mine recommended it to me." She answered.
"I see." The wind blew again for seconds. I closed my eyes, feeling the breeze going through my hair, as I lay down on the grass. Not to mention that I'm listening to a soothing music. The girl sat down beside me, as we experience a nice breeze of silence.
Time passed that I didn't notice. I fell asleep. The sun's setting, and to my surprise— the girl's still here. To add, my head's already laying on the girl's lap. I was gonna stood up with my panic face but she stopped me, pushing my forehead back on her lap.
"It's fine." She said.
"Oh. Ok. Then, let me get some energy to stand up again." I said with a grin. She laughed at me. I laughed also.
"Shinji-kun, thank you for spending your time with me. I had fun—"
"Despite that we didn't do anything?" I interrupted. I stood up facing her. I looked away from her, scratching my head, continuing,
"Well, there are different ways to have fun. I guess." I offered her my hand. She smiled. Then, she took my hand. While pulling her up, she said,
"Aha~ since you don't mind me calling you Shinji-kun, you can call me Monoko."
"Monoko!?" I suddenly lose my grip, ending herself tripping and landing on to my chest with her head first.
"Kyaa!" I grabbed her shoulder for support. I caught her but our position came out unexpected. Her hand clenched to my jacket while her other hand linked towards my right hand, raised above our height. It must've been my reflexes. I was looking down at her twin tails. Then she looked up, as I directed my eyes on her. I'll admit. She's cute. Ahh. This is bad. I could feel that my face getting red. To make it worse, I could feel her breathing that it tickles my spine. Realizing that I'm in a worse-case scenario, I snapped myself off by separating ourselves apart.
"Aha~ Thanks for catching me." She said, showing her tongue with an idol pose.
"Ahh, no. It was my fault. So, don't bother." I looked away, pinching my cheek.
"Well anyway, I'll be off then." I walked to go home.
"Wait!" The voice echoed. Yes. It was Mo-mo—. . . . Mo-. . . . Monoko. Ahh. Even just saying her name inside my head was awkward.
"Let me come with you." She said eagerly.
"Huh!?" I was shocked. I'm more shock than the previous one. Did I just do something to experience such thing as this!? No, wait. I better don't jump into conclusions. So let's go and ask her before I go nuts or whatever reaction I'll do next. But she told me first before I could ask her.
"B-because I ran away from home and I don't want to come back for a while." Her words keep on decreasing in tone. I seriously thought about it for few seconds. Then, I come up with a conclusion.
"Ok. I don't mind." With that, I put a smile on her face.
"But, on one condition." I followed. She looked at me with curiosity.
"Tell you family that you'll be staying to a friend of yours. And that's me, ok?" She fidgets with a hesitant look. But, agreed on my condition with a nod.
"Good. Now, let's go." I ordered. She followed. Honestly, I'm nervous. This is the first time a girl would go to my house. But I never expected this to happen, not ever. If I'm your average guy, I would've asked a girl. But, no~ I don't actually have friends. I don't even go to school anymore. Or add that burden, I'm a NEET. A person who's "Not-Employed or Education-in-Training." So, I could somehow understand myself to Monoko. She must've realize that she taste the sweetness and sourness of reality. Although, it might not be too late for her. So, I'll try to help her as I could. Because I got a lot of time in my life, despite that I don't want to admit it. Anyways, after a long ride of transportations, I'm finally home, with Monoko. I shuffled my pocket for my trusty paper clips. Then, I picked my door using paper clips.
"What are you doing?" Monoko asked.
"Opening my door." I replied.
"Don't you have any spare keys with you?" Monoko raised a brow.
"Tch. I don't use keys." Then, a chuck sound came to the door. I opened the door.
"Well, make yourself comfortable." I invited her.
"Thanks again." She entered. I live in an apartment, by the way. My own apartment. Yeah. You heard me right. I ran away from home, two years ago. I just come home occasionally and they don't mind about it. And about the room on where I was, it was my room until I left. It became a storage room. Hmmp. Anyways, my apartment's not that big. One room fits the kitchen and the two-in-one, living and dining area. The other's my bedroom. Yep. My apartment's divided into two rooms. You could ever think about someone who has the same apartment arrangement as mine. As while as I was talking to myself, I'm making dinner for us. Although, I'm no cook. So our dinner's only an instant curry that's in store into one of my cupboard. I heated the curry in the microwave for five minutes and served us some drinks while we wait for the curry.
"Here's a soda for you. Hope your okay with acidic drinks." I put the drinks on the table. They're soda cans.
"You don't like acidic drinks?" Monoko asked.
"Nah. It's just that I only drink acidic instead of alcoholic beverages. It prevents me to have an urge of drinking alcohol when I get depressed or tired." I explained, popping my soda can open. I took three, big gulps in it.
"So, you're depressed?" Her eyes narrowed. How could I be depressed at this situation? I'm actually more tense than depressed. But I told her,
"No, I'm not. I'm just sharing a drink with you. That's all." I forwarded my can on her like going for a toast. I just said something that doesn't make sense. I felt embarrass. She suddenly laughed at me.
"I'm just kidding. Don't take it so seriously." Monoko patted my back with two, hard hits that ended me coughing. Monoko took her soda can. Then, when Monoko's going to open her soda can, it slipped into her hands and rolled on the floor to my bedroom.
"Ahhh." Monoko stood up as she chases her soda can towards my bedroom. But before that, she asked me a permission to go for her soda, even that it isn't needed.
"May I?" I gestured her to go so. I took my last gulp in my can. Emptied my can, I noticed something. While Monoko's picking her can, there's a disturbing feeling that squeezed my chest as I saw it. . . . I lowered my can and placed it on the table.
"Monoko." I called her.
"Hmm?" She replied. She faced towards me but looking at her soda can, opening it. I braced myself as I breathe heavily. I began to sweat and my heart's pounding. I spoke with fear,
"You're not human, are you?" My throat suddenly dried up. The microwave suddenly beeps, telling us that the curry's ready. But, I couldn't move. Monoko nods into my question.
"How did you know?" Monoko asked.
"Well, I noticed that I can't seem to see your shadow and I just realize it, so—" My throat completely dried up that I couldn't speak anymore.
"Just take it easy, ok? I won't harm you." She walked towards me, putting her soda can on the table. Monoko offered her hand towards me. I flinched.
"I won't harm you. Trust me." Monoko attempted to reach for my hand. She moved closer. I reached for her hand, hesitantly and slowly. I stopped halfway. But I continued until that I could tap her fingertips. Then, she suddenly grabs my hand and pulled me towards her. That's it. It's over for me. I've prepared for the worst to happen.
". . !"
". . . . . ." Silence draws the room. . . . I was hugged by Monoko, burying my face on her chest.
"Mmp. ." I was surprised. I'm out of words. But, this feeling— the sensational of being hug by a girl. It's too mainstream. I could feel her warmth. Just by this I calmed down. I fell weak in my knees as she kneels down as well.
"Feeling better now?" Monoko asked.
"Nn." I replied. Hearing that, she breaks the physical contact and stood up.
"Now that you know my identity, I'll explain as specific as I could. Well, let's talk here in your room. Oh. And you can take my soda if you want." She walked inside my room. I looked at her soda. I took a drink in it.
". . . . It's not cold anymore.
Few minutes later, I'm already in my room, talking to Monoko about herself.
"So as you now know that I'm not a human like you. I'm actually a ghost that's still roaming in this world." I froze in awe. My brain's processing in every detail that Monoko's saying.
"I just died recently if you don't mind me saying."
"Then, is that the reason that you're still existing in this world?" I asked.
"To be frank, you're probably correct. I'm in the state called Purgatory Mode. Well, that's what they told me." Monoko answered.
"I have seven days until I completely cease to exist. It's something like a time bomb, waiting to be detonated." Monoko followed with hand gestures.
"Then, you should go and see your parents and relatives, one last time. You can fly, right? You're a ghost." I said it in a convincing way.
"I am. But—"
"But what?" Monoko fell silent. I waited for her to talk. But, she shakes her head and said,
"Well anyway, I hope you could take care of me in these seven days. Chu~" Monoko did a flying kiss with a girly pose.
"Eh. Eh!? No way!" With that agreement, we ended the day by being to accept her temporary existence in my life.
[2nd Day: Connection and Acceptance]
I woke up with a daze as I sat up on my floor bed. I checked my bed, which Monoko slept in. It was empty. I messed my hair in an up-down motion. I stood up and stepped out in my room.
"Good morning, Shinji-kun." I faced to where the voice came from. It was Monoko. She carries two plates with curry and rice. It must've been from yesterday's dinner.
"Yeah. Morning." I sat down as Monoko puts down the plates. She pumps her fists in the air. Energetic as usual and I'm groggy as usual.
"Anyway, why they're two—? Keh. Don't tell me you're going to eat also."
"That's right." Monoko answered as she was stating the obvious.
"You're kidding me, right?" I made a face. Monoko demonstrates. She grabs a spoonful of curry and eats it, chewed it, then swallowed.
"See?" She shrugged.
"How is that possible!? Aren't you a ghost!?" I pointed her, exclaiming the contradiction of the world.
"Now, now. Shinji-kun, don't sweat the details." She shoved my argument, followed by a notebook that she threw, hitting my face.
"Guuah!" I collapsed on the floor.
"That hurt." I rubbed my nose. My energy to argue suddenly drained in an instant. Monoko giggled.
"But, Shinji-kun." Monoko called.
"Ou?" I replied, still rubbing my nose as I sat back in front of the table.
"Thank you for treating me, as a human being."
"I mean, well, I'm a ghost and all. So I thought that you wouldn't accept me." Monoko continued. I thought of what I should answer. Then, I spoke,
"Well, you were human in the past, aren't you?" Monoko nodded.
"Then, it's normal for me to treat you as one." Monoko froze in bewilderment. Few seconds later, she talked,
"I don't get it." I enlightened her. I added,
"It's true that I was frightened when I know the truth about you. But despite that, we're still talking like nothing at all. Not to mention, you're the first 'person' that I could consider as my friend. So, I hope you do as well." Tears began to fall down in Monoko's cheeks. She's crying in relief. It's all that I could do for her. To be with Monoko in a short time. I don't know much about her. Yet, I know that she'll talk about herself more, tomorrow or after tomorrow. It might even after, after tomorrow. Time would tell as our remaining days elapsed. Monoko calmed down and wiped her tears.
"Ahh~ you saw me crying." She pouted.
"But thanks. I know that I could depend on you." And now she's smiling brightly as she didn't cried at all. Then, I teased her,
"Ouu~ I didn't know that Monoko's a crybaby." I stepped in my room for my usual routine.
"Am not!" Monoko stuck a tongue out as she follows me inside my room.
And in a whole day, we spent it my apartment. Monoko doing my chores as I chat with my "friends". Apparently, they're my buddies that I only met in the cyberworld and from various online games that I'm playing. Monoko, done with the chores, sat beside me and patiently watched my routine for a day. Then, she broke it.
"Bear it." Monoko groans in boredom.
[3rd Day: Date and Relationship]
Tall buildings, crowded areas, busy traffic, various shop markets, food stalls, and restaurants. . . . This is the life of the city. And I was at the central, sitting on a bench, fatigued. Why? Because I got dragged by Monoko. How? Here's the scenario. I was playing an online game with my party and Monoko suddenly pulled me away from the game.
Shinji-kun, let's go outside.
What? Why should we? I tried to pull away but she's got the handicap. She's pulling me while in air. It's my first I saw her abilities as a ghost.
I'm bored. Can't we at least go outside?
You'll be spotted by someone without your shadow.
Ahh. That? You don't have to worry. You're the only person who can see me. Monoko said it confidently.
I guess that explains your ghostly powers but why can you grab things and touch me? Not to mention, I felt your body like almost real. I finally pull her off as she loses her grip and flew back. Monoko, in air, taps her cheek to put her thoughts in words. She picked an example.
You know what poltergeists do, no?
And you're saying that other sees it as it's floating?
That's your answer.
Hmm. Then, what about your body heat that I just felt? I asked while I returned to my game. My character's now being beaten up by a boss monster.
Pervert. My eyes twitched from hearing it.
I'm only asking. Monoko pouts and crossed her arms. She expected more from my usual comebacks. Then, she just let it slide and answers in an apologetic way,
It's one of those supernatural phenomena that I can't explain to you. Sorry.
Nah, it's fine. You aren't an occult expert anyway. I said it with a grin. Then, Monoko goes back into her usual character and asks.
So, can we go outside now?
No. My grin suddenly drops to tell her that I'm serious in my answer.
Ok. If you don't want to— She backs off a little.
Ei! Then, she snaps a sharp noise coming from her fingers that echoed inside the room.
Ahhh! I shouted.
My life source! I continued as I'm agonizing in sorrow. And that ended us to this park. She even boldly told me that this is a date. Heh. A human and a ghost, dating? Not to mention, I'm almost done freaking quest. I cuddled myself like a sushi, sobbing.
"What's wrong?" Monoko came back. I let her lead our date since she wants to. I couldn't care less about the quest. I'll just clear it some other time. It's just a game anyway. I only play because I got tons of time. But I'll admit, I'm an enthusiast. Although with my gaming skills, I'm only an average.
"Uh. It's nothing. So, have you found some place that interests you?"
"Yeah. I just found a carnival. Let's go there!"
"Sure. Sure. How far?" I stood up with a stagger. Then, Monoko answers by pulling me all the way to the carnival. Luckily, no one didn't pay "us" in mind.
We arrived at the carnival. It was a twenty-minute walk. To explain the events briefly, we got to ride on various rides with our pranks on our sleeves, like I was riding on a coaster while Monoko's flying in the air. We were shouting like we don't care. In reality, everyone on the ride sees it as a crazy maniac, screaming out of his lungs. Aha. I don't care. I'm use on being in an attention. But I'm no attention-grabber. Also, we also played games. I even told Monoko to cheat our win. Like in the bottle game on where you have to hit and knock down the bottles. When I eat, that's the hard part. I bought food for the two of us. I even need to find a place where they're only few people to prevent an "outbreak". At the end of the day, we left and over to the mountain to view out the city. Despite this day, I'll admit that I enjoyed it. Moreover, I got tons of stuff to bring home. And that's the irritating part. Then, as I arrived home, I fell forward on my bed. I fell asleep right away, leaving Monoko as she pokes in my sleep.
"Stop it." I mumbled.
[4th Day: Reminiscence and Resonance]
Ahh. Morning already?" I groaned in irritation. After all of yesterday's goofing around, I ended up empty. More like my energy for today's use was depleted earlier than planned. I reached for my clock. It's already 7:04AM. I put the clock back. I struggled to get myself awake, especially my eyes. Whenever I open them, it hurts. But, as soon as I got to look on the other side of my side, Monoko was there. I suddenly say up with my eyes wide open.
"Good. Morning. Shinji. -kun." Monoko was lying down with back hand supporting her head. I threw a pillow directed at her.
"Hey! What did you that for!?"
"Don't sneak up on me and greet me in that manner."
"Why? Don't you like fanservice in the mornings?"
"You're the one who made that thought, yourself." I sighed. I stood and started my routine, like the usual
After lunch, I told Monoko that I'll be going out for a walk and told her to stay at home. I suddenly got bored in playing since I already got what I wanted. An Ateista set for my character. With that, I told myself to relax a little and get some air. I go to the central park. In there, there's a playground nearby. I sometimes go there with this reason. I bought a juice at the vending machine and sat on a nearby bench at the playground. I looked at the playground. There were kids playing. What I like the most in the playgrounds are the metal bars. I laid my back, closed my eyes, and I put my juice on my stomach. There was this memory when I was a kid, playing at this playground. It was dismissal time from my old school. But actually, I'm not playing. I was just sitting on the bench, looking at them like what I'm doing now. Exclude the laying and the juice part, though. Then, I saw a girl, playing on a sandbox, alone. I approached her and asked her if I could join. She decline. But, I sat beside her and play with her anyway.
Why? She asked me, expressionless. She asked me of why her I chose to be with her than to the other kids at the playground. Then, I answered,
It's because I wanted to. I replied.
You're weird and somehow mysterious. She closed her eyes as she speaks. I only chuckled and took it as a compliment. After that, I shuffled my back for a paper. I took out one of my test papers in class.
Hold out your hand. I told her. She obeyed. Then, I put the paper between her hands. I closed them with my hands. Then, it magically turned into a paper crane.
Keep it. I told her. Then, I bid her a farewell. I haven't seen her since that. I wonder how she doing now. I bet that she's still that usual expressionless girl who isolated herself inside her room. With that thought, I opened my eyes. I came back in the reality as the scene of noisy playground came into my field of vision. I opened my juice and gave it a one-go. I threw it in the trash bin as I stood up, walking towards the metal bars. As I walked, I saw a boy beside one of the metal bars, looking at them. I took one of the metal bars above my height. I lifted myself to the ground. The boy startled. I looked at him and smiled. Then, I looked at the world like it wasn't before. I sighed. I did some somersaults on it as I landed on the ground on my last turn.
"Ohhh!" The boy exclaimed. I think he was astonished.
"How did you do that!?" He asked.
"Confidence, kid. Confidence. I ruffled his hair as I left.
"Monoko, I'm back." I closed the door.
Hmm. Something's doesn't seem to fit here. I thought.
"Monoko, you there?" I'm getting an uneasy feeling here. I came into my room to check.
"Monoko?" I examined the room until there, I saw her. She was at the corner of the room, crouching. This isn't her usual self. I walked towards her. I reached and grabbed her shoulder. She startled. She must've not notice me. Monoko turned over to face. As she did, I saw tears, tears that kept on going. But in truth, she was holding it in.
"What's wrong? Did something happen?" I asked in worry. Monoko didn't answer. Then, she finally noticed my presence. She clenched my jacket. She buried her face at my chest. Then, she couldn't hold it any longer, she cried hard. It gave me goosebumps as I embraced her. Tears suddenly rolled down under my cheeks. It wasn't because of sympathy. It's because my closed-off memories suddenly came, rushing my head. I remembered every fragments of it. As it keeps on going, I hold Monoko tighter and tighter. But, she didn't resist. She kept on crying. It felt like an eternity. But in fact, it only lasted for two minutes.
We calmed down after that. I wiped her teary eyes. Then, Monoko utterly spoke,
"I shouldn't have remember this. . . ."
"Just relax, ok? I'll be fine." I said, continuing to wipe her tears. Then,
"Shinji-kun. . . . sorry. I couldn't let myself to follow." She pushed me back as she stood up, bolted out at the door.
"Wait, Monoko! . . . Ack!" I chased her. But, it was in vain. My mind suddenly flashed white. I knelt in pain, as I looked at the opened door. I leaped myself outside. She wasn't there anymore.
[5th Day: Disappearance and Development]
After what happened yesterday was very unexpected. I fell ill but it wasn't that serious. It was only a rough headache. But, even that I wanted to look for her, my body doesn't let me so. And that let me worry so much that I couldn't sleep well. I try to shake the feeling off but no. How could I be like this? I'm so miserable. I thought that I'll be ok if we do this often but for certain— something must've triggered her to act like this, and to such a pure coincidence, my long time memory called me as it's provoking me. I have a memory that I've forgotten. Yet, it now came back to me. And I thought living the life that I have now would let me rest as it is. But, letting that aside, for once, maybe. That, I wanted to be selfish. Or not. I've been selfish for quite a long time now. I'll admit it, even that I wanted to deny it. I wanted to be with her for a long, long time. But, time won't let us. The nature wouldn't accept us, too. I'm human, and she's a ghost. But, enough of this chit-chat, I still got to find Monoko. I'll do what it takes. I'll choose what's right and what's wrong. And I'll even go against the principles of the world, if that would it takes for me to satisfy myself. So, I tossed myself up on the floor and rushed towards outside in a search for Monoko.
I searched for the places we gone to. Chances are slim but, it'll take it anyway. I looked on every corner of that district. The playground, the park, the carnival. . . . She wasn't there. So, I searched for other possible leads. But, I even don't have any clues, to tell you the truth. I just ran and ran for various places in hope of finding Monoko. Then, after a minute or two, I suddenly remember one place that I missed. Yeah. She might be there. So, I didn't waste more time and gone to a train station. I rode a train to that destination. . . .
I arrived to where I need to take off the train. I ran towards the exit, bumping to several people. Ahhh. Crowds. Such timing. I hope that she's there. Then, I managed. I'm out of the station. I called a taxi and rode it. Several minutes later, I'm finally there. The cemetery— the place of where I met Monoko for the first time. I silently took each step as I breathe for air. I was exhausted. My vision's blurry. My heart's aching. My head's pounding. I body's almost at my limit but, I'm almost there. To that spot— of where the soft breeze that calms and relaxes. To where I'll let you experience a world that you've never expect to be this beautiful. And now, I was in it as I saw a familiar figure, looking beyond the cliff. I rested beside the tree. I sighed in relief.
"Monoko." I called her. She turned to me.
"Shinji-kun." Monoko called back. She walked towards me. Then, she sat down beside me. She strokes my face, caressing it.
"I'm sorry." Monoko said.
"Don't be. Why would you apologize anyway?" I said. She shook her head. Then,
"It was my fault that you're at this state, right?" Monoko asked.
"Yeah. . . . Yes, you are." I replied. She's about to cry. But, I followed,
"But Monoko, It was my idea from the beginning. To find you. To scold you. To shout you at! But, do you know what I wanted to do to you, all this time!?" I exclaimed. As she heard me shout, she closed her eyes in fear. Then,
"To hold you in my arms." I embraced her. I catch her off-guard.
"I was worried sick about you, you know." I cried on her shoulder. Then, I felt her hands, answering me back. She hugged me back.
"I'm sorry! . . I'm sorry! . . I'm sorry!" Monoko kept apologizing. She cried on my shoulder as well.
"I promise that to never leave on your side again!" Monoko exclaimed.
"You better not! Because if you do it again, I'll— I'll—!" I was mixed in emotions. I couldn't tell her what I really what to say. We embraced that long until we snap back to ourselves. Then, after we have calmed down, I told her that I'll be taking her to a place. To my secret place.
Few minutes later, we arrived. It was already evening. This place's actually just from my apartment. In fact, it's just only at the rooftop of my apartment. It's like a secret passage, like you need to budge it a bit to open. I beckoned her over.
"Come on. Here."
"Huh? . . Whaaa!?" I lifted her up. She's light. Too light. Might be because she's a ghost? Then, I put her down on the floor. I was ready for her to hit me with her comebacks. But, she just stayed silent, blushing furiously. Then, I closed the floor door. I sat into a couch. And not to mention, you can even view the starry skies with some good equipment here. I didn't mind Monoko at all. She wasn't in awe, looking at the night sky.
"Did you like the view?" I asked. Monoko nodded. She was absorbed at the starry sky. Heh. This would take awhile. So, I took my Portable out and plug my headphones in it. I waited for her to get tired by it. After two songs, she sat beside me. I guess she's satisfied. I stopped the soundtrack but I left the headphones on. I waited, waited for her to talk. I was expecting that she would take an initiative. And my intuition was right.
"Say, haven't your experience that there's something missing in your life?" Monoko said. I fell silent as I remember my closed-off memory again. Then, I nodded and said,
"Yeah. I actually do." Monoko looked at me quizzically.
"When I was a kid, I got hospitalized. You see, I got a heart failure so, excessive movements aren't my thing. It took me a year to get out from my rehabilitation. I was born in that illness." I sighed.
"Shinji-kun. . . ." I stopped her, gesturing her that I'm ok. Then, I continued,
"My parents can't visit that often because of their work. I understand that. Then, one time, my little sister came over to see me."
"Little sister?" Monoko's looking at me more curious than before. I nodded.
"My little sister always clings to me whenever we're together. I adore her so much that I even told myself that, Is this even my little sister!? No way! I would have fallen for her if she's this cute!" Monoko laughed. I laughed also. Glad that I lighten up the mood a little. Then, I fell serious.
"Anyway, as I was saying, my little sister loves me so much. She always visits me in place of our parents. I always enjoy her company. She took it in heart that she'll be making this as her routine. In fact, she's more like yourself. Very energetic, happy-go-lucky, and a carefree person. Then, one day, when she told me that she was going to visit me again. I was very happy. But, somehow, she didn't come earlier than the usual. I thought that maybe, maybe that she just feeling uneasy because she's pushing herself too much. But, I was wrong. . . ."
"What do you mean?"
"On that day, my little sister, got into an accident." Monoko shocked. But, I continued anyway.
"She was accidentally got hit by truck. Report says that it was because of the truck's mechanical problem. But weirdly, I didn't blame the driver. . . . I didn't blame the mechanic. . " I paused. I looked at Monoko.
"It was my fault. It's me to be blame on the reason of why my little sister isn't living now!" I shouted. Monoko gently took my hands and clasp them as she shook her head.
"You shouldn't think of that way, Shinji-kun." Monoko said.
"Your little sister will be sad if you continue to think that way."
"But it's true, wasn't it? It's my fault."
"Shinji-kun, didn't your little sister have any regrets?" Monoko asked. But then again, did she have any regrets? I think she even has one. No person leave without any regrets in this world. Not even my kind and loving little sister. Then, I told her,
"My parents don't love my little sister like the way they do for me." Again, Monoko was shocked. It's like she just found a puzzle that were scrambled. As pieces fits in, she forms a picture and realizes the reason of why no person leaving such puzzle complete, as they destroys it again.
"The reason why is because she was attach to me. And, that might be her possible regret, that our parents didn't love her as she wants to." I fell silent. But, Monoko just shook her head.
"But, what was important is that she loves you, isn't it?" Monoko said.
"Then, it's ok. Even that time passes, your little sister will always love you, present or not. Despite anything, she doesn't have any regrets on visiting her brother. And about your parents, it might have been hard for her because she could only depend on you. And to add, she always visits you, no? So I'm certain that she really loves that much. But, I'm sure that she's worried about you, thinking that it's your fault. So, lighten up, ok?" I lowered my head. I was out of words. I couldn't think straight. Why didn't I realize this just now? I finally made a smirk then I laughed as loud as I could. Ahhh. My eyes. It's getting watery again.
"Shinji-kun?" Ack. I lost myself there.
"Thank you, Monoko."
"Ehh? Ahh. No. It's nothing to be thankful. Hnn." Monoko didn't expect this. It's quite amusing to look at her. I hold my laughed but Monoko noticed it. She suddenly produces out a notebook of nowhere. How the hell did she do that!? Then, it ended up on my face. But, I didn't mind. I'm glad that we're back at being this carefree. Then, she asked a question.
"By the way, Shinji-kun. What's the name of your little sister?" I smiled at the question that Monoko asked. It didn't give me that negative feeling anymore.
"Miya. Miya Heisei." I answered.
"Miya-chan, huh? Pretty name."
"Isn't it?" I grinned at her. Then, the night continues to pass as we talked, under the starry skies.
[6th Day: Reflection and Realization]
[A lot had happened since I have met Monoko Reisei. Monoko was actually human from her past and now as a ghost. On our first meeting, I thought of her as an ordinary girl with an aura of a glamorous, wealthy, well-mannered girl. Not to mention that she suddenly told me to take her home at my apartment because she ran away from her home. It was quite a surprising development. But, all has been revealed when I found out her identity. Then, she explained to me that she's a ghost. She's into a state called Purgatory Mode for she could live her last seven days in this world. Then, we lived together after that. I told myself that it's okay since it's only temporary. But, my thought of her of disappearing from this world is getting harder and harder, as I spend my time with Monoko, who keeps on pulling me and forcing me to go this and there. At first, it was a total pain but I enjoyed being with her. Doing pranks, making random comebacks. . . . I won't ever forget this feeling of being carefree. It was all thanks to Monoko. Without her, I might be doing the usual routines, every time. But, when I go out for a walk and get some fresh air, something happened while I wasn't with Monoko. She was crying at the corner of my room. Then, she bolted out and disappeared. This is where I thought of Monoko. Monoko was special. I didn't realize it myself but I totally got dependent towards her. Without her at my side just make me lose myself. I was at the state of losing someone again. But, before that could happen, I told myself to myself that I'll cherish every memory of her, even that it this was all just an illusion. She even told me that she'll always be by my side. But, I'm certain that it won't be long until that promise would last. So tomorrow, is the last day of her Purgatory Mode. Our days were quite short but, it was all worth it. And well, there was this one thing that I wanted to ask about her, personally. I wanna know about her past, her life of where she was still human. But, I shouldn't expect too much, huh? But, I'll try to press her to tell me about her. So, while I try my luck, I'll be updating y'all for a couple of days. Thanks for reading.]
I sighed. Yes. Finally done with my blog.
"Hmm. Shinji-kun, what are you doing?" Monoko titled her head to see.
"Ahhh, Monoko! Uh! It's just a community forum of where I look in a need to locate rare items." I scratched my head while the other covers the monitor. She narrowed her eyes at my suspicious behavior. But, she didn't mind anyway.
"Okay. Whatever. Hey, are we leaving today?"
"Sure, sure. Just wait a sec."
"Wai~!" Monoko's cheering happily with her hands in the air. Then, as I was gonna turn off my computer, something catch my attention.
"Hey, Monoko. Look at this." Monoko came closer. Her eyes beamed with excitement.
"Ahhh! There's a festival tomorrow at the Shinto shrine!"
"That's right! Wanna go?" She nodded enthusiastically.
"Then, we're going over on the evening. But for now, let's go and go to an amusement park or something!"
"Yeah!" Monoko came out at the door first. I followed as I turned the lights off and closed the door. And we're all settled!
[7th Day: Festival and Farewell]
Evening lights lit as the sun goes down. It's quite a festive place, I must say. I may be frank; it's just like the carnival that we came to. Although, a little bit different. Because many people were wearing traditional clothes. But me, I'm just wearing my usual jacket and pants on such event. Not to mention, Monoko as well. But, I understand that since she couldn't change clothes. She looked at every people she sees with envy.
"I wish that I could wear those." Monoko pouted. I smiled at her.
"Well anyway, shall we go and help ourselves?" She nodded. Then, we walked all corners of the festival. The food, the games, the ceremonial dance. . . . I kept on imprinting these moments with Monoko. In the end, it's getting harder and harder for me to accept the fact. The fact the Monoko will cease to exist in the world, today by midnight. . . . I just couldn't imagine of what would happen next. . . . My chest's feeling heavy. Then, I was awaked by Monoko's usual cheery tone.
"Shinji-kun." I startled. I was almost in tears. But, I hold it in, as I hold Monoko's hand.
"Hoeh?" She made a sound. I just smiled. And she smiled back. I couldn't do much but to keep silent as we go to many stalls. Then, the thought came into me.
"Ahhh! Let's go and buy some snacks. After that, let's go over at the top of the Shinto shrine. By the way I could feel it; the fireworks display will be starting soon."
"Ehhhh? Is that so? Shinji-kun's a psychic then." We laughed as we took off to bring different types of food. Then, we all put them into the plastic bags. I was lifting four plastic bags of various festive delicacies. I know. I was exaggerating. Then, we walked to the Shinto shrine. We were the only existence at the top. Most were still below down the stalls. We sat at the stairway of the shrine. I put the plastic bags between our feet.
"Say, Monoko. Sorry if I bring this now but, what kind of life were you living when you're still alive back then?" I finally asked her. Her smile decreases when she heard my question. She closed her eyes in thought.
"I guess it's my turn to tell about my past, huh?" Monoko sighed.
"Uhh, no. If you don't feel like sharing, I don't mind at all." I said it hesitantly. But, she shook her head.
"It's okay. It's my time anyway. And besides, I want you to know everything about me—of what I felt, of what I was, of what I've become. . . ." She paused for a sec. Then,
"Of what kind of death I'd experience." Monoko followed. We were in silence as we hear the noises at the festival. Then, she started.
"In the past, I was living in such pitiful sight. I was a person who couldn't feel and express any emotion. The love that my parents felt for me— I couldn't feel it. Even on that day, our house was burned down on that night. I was the only survivor of that incident."
"I see. I'm sorry to hear that." Monoko only smiled.
"I was put into an orphanage after that incident. The kids there didn't like me at all because of my expressionless behavior. Thus, I didn't stand out. I was alone, even that we were a lot of them who were having fun. But, there's a day that I couldn't forget. It was such a bizarre event." I made an intensive stare. I was getting interested.
"There was a boy who suddenly approached me. He wasn't one of us at the orphanage. He told me that he wanted to play with me. But, I didn't accept that. But, he ignored me and played with me anyway." Monoko followed. Wait— this memory is. . . . I see. So, you're that girl. . . . I never knew.
"He even gave me this." She took something from her pocket. It was a paper crane. It has something written on it, showing the test result of a perfect score.
"Hmm~ such an understanding guy."
"Tee-hee." Monoko stuck a tongue out. But, it didn't end there.
"After when I meet that boy, I was somehow given a hope to live my live to the fullest. Although, with my parents gone and no relatives, I have decided. I took a journey.
"You did what!?" I exclaimed. Monoko laughed at my reaction.
"Aha. I know. I was a selfish. I secretly ran away from the orphanage one night. But, it's okay. If I remember correctly, I left a note of leaving on a journey to find my purpose in life." Monoko said it with enthusiasm.
"That's not the point here." I narrowed my eyes. Monoko giggled. Then, she sighed.
"I'll admit, I lived my life to the fullest when I gone off in a journey. Going to several places and stuff. Although, I didn't gone to other countries as to what you could imagine. I just planned on going all the places here. Then, while I was off to the other town. I died." Monoko lowered her head as she continued.
"I was shot and I don't know why. . . . Funny, isn't it? Despite that I'm living a good life, luck isn't just at my side. Not to mention, if I only knew that incident to where our house burned down, I should have made a lot of time with my parents!"
"But you love them, right?" I told her.
"If you love your parents, isn't that all that matters. No matter where you go and whatever you do, there are always there for you by the actions you take."
"To be frank with you, I despise my parents because of what they were acting to Miya. That's why I left the house and live on my own. And I know that we got different problems of our own." Monoko shook her head.
"Different yet similar, don't you think?" I nodded. Then, Monoko stood up as she took one of the goods from the plastic bag and stretched her arms in the air.
"Now, now. Why did we came here again~?" Monoko asked. I smirked and said,
"Because to have fun."
"That's right. So, no more questions about those, 'kay?"
"Sure, sure. But, one and last question, though." I replied.
"That tombstone with no name, was that yours?" She nodded and replied,
"Long story short, I gave my last words from a person who founded me that I want my grave in here without my name in it."
"Why is that?" I asked.
"No reason. It's just a plain curiosity of how people would react with that."
"That doesn't make any sense at all."
"What? It's my grave bed, and I'll do whatever I want with it."
"Whatever you say." After that, fireworks exploded in the night sky. People cheers in each firework that explodes. And as the two of us, I watched silently as Monoko cheers with them. Such sight.
The festival ended with the fireworks in the sky disappeared. We left in a hurry. We came home and climbed up to my place. We sat down on the floor, back-to-back, waiting for that time.
"I guess this is it, then?" Monoko said.
"Nn." I nodded. I looked at my watch. We still have much time left. . . . Seven minutes before midnight. Yet, I couldn't think of anything to talk with. I mean, there are a lot of things that I wanted to say yet, my consciousness couldn't take that this is the day, the day of were everything's going to be of an everyday life. Then, I couldn't control myself as I said,
"Hmm?" Monoko said in confusion.
"It's unfair that you'll be leaving me now that I think of you of something special."
"No. Shinji-kun. Please. Stop." But I continued.
"Do you think that I'll forget the moments that I've spend with you? I won't. I won't."
"Shinji-kun. . . ."
"Monoko, I'm in love with you. Don't you get it? I wanted you to always by my side. I love you, Monoko." Then, Monoko leaned on my back. She sighed and said,
"I understand of how you feel, Shinji-kun. But, time would break us apart, like what's going to happen later." I fell silent as she took my hand, still leaning on my back."
"Shinji-kun, I'll be harder for us to say our goodbyes if our feelings for each other is that strong. That's the reason why I couldn't say my feelings for you. I hope you understand."
"But, isn't that something that I should know? We won't be seeing each other again and I'll be very hard for me to move forward with these feelings for you." And it was Monoko's turn that fell silent.
"If that's what you want, I'll share this feeling with you."
"What do you mean? Monoko said. As I turned myself towards her and catch her, letting herself face me.
"Produce a paper for me." I said.
"Just do what I tell you to." Then with just that, Monoko took out a piece of paper that's right the size that I needed.
"Good. Now let me have it." In confusion, Monoko gave it to me. As I got the paper, I breathe in and out with my eyes closed. Then,
"Hold out your hand." Monoko's eyes widened. She might know of where's this heading to. She put her hands as I put the paper in there. I let her close her hands with my hands. Few seconds later, I let her opened her hands.
"This is. . . ."
"Yes, Monoko. It's was me whom you have met from that day. The day before you have left on your journey." Monoko suddenly broke tears.
". . Huh? That's weird. Why am I crying? Isn't today's the best day?" I didn't answer. I looked at my watch. . . . Two minutes left. This is bad. I better think of something. I grabbed her shoulders.
"Monoko, before everything, I want to tell you again that I really, really love you!" Agghhh! Why of all things that I need to say!? She already knows it! Then suddenly, Monoko embraced me. She's still in tears.
"Shinji-kun. . . . You're so unfair."
"I'm sorry, Monoko." I hugged her back. As I gave her an embraced, she did hers more.
"Nyaaa~! I couldn't take this anymore! I love you! I love you! I love you so much, Shinji-kun!" Monoko shouted. Her face's filled with tears. She looked at me like she's expecting a reply towards me. But I couldn't reply back. I was in shocked. I couldn't explain it in words but, all that I could say is that I'm glad. I'm glad that she felt the same way as I did. In the end, she was too dependent at me. She doesn't want to show that weak side of her. And I'm at the same boat; I don't want her to disappear. I want to be with her more than I ever could imagine. I felt tears in my face that's starting to flow. I couldn't take this parting. If this is a dream, I want to wake up. But if I wake up, I wouldn't know anything onwards. So, if this is a dream, please. Don't let me wake myself up.
"Well, I guess, that's all I want to say. Even that I don't mean it. Oh. And since you have two paper cranes, how about you give the other one to Miya? Is that even possible?" I said in a joking manner. Monoko chuckled.
"I don't know. But, we'll see." We smiled as we leaned our foreheads to each other, gazing at each other's eyes.
"Remember, Shinji-kun, no matter what happens next, I'll always be by your side. That's our promise." Monoko caressed my cheeks.
"It'll be our promise." I smiled. Monoko smiled back. And for the final moments, we kissed, to show our affections to each other. As we parted our kiss, Monoko Reisei, disappeared. I sighed as my emotions started to calm down. But when I looked up into the sky, I filled myself with mixed emotions.
[8th Day: Beginning and The End]
After everything that have happened last week was unbelievable. I couldn't even help myself to simply believe that everything was all real. It was so bizarre. Yet, there's no way that I would forget such memories. Even that it was all just an illusion, I would still let myself to believe that; that Monoko Reisei was the person whom I be with, whom I had fun with, and whom I have love so much. Yes. It may not look like it but I've been suffering after that. My chest kept on hurting whenever I thought about her. It's just not that easy to be in love with someone. Tell me if I'm wrong. I was just lying down on my floor, all day. I tried to kill time by using the computer but I felt broken and lazy. So, I turned it off. Then, I thought about the blog that I need to update. But, I don't have the mood to. Hmmm. I wonder how Monoko is doing. Hah. Hahaha. Haah. Monoko, what should I do if you were me? . . . That's it. Since that I couldn't do nothing with my life at all, why not follow her footsteps? To travel from different cities of all Japan. Yeah. It might be nice, being carefree that is. Is it even possible to travel all of Japan? . . . Thinking about it, it might be possible. I just need some cash like, ¥300,000. . . . No, ¥400— Ahhh. ¥500,000. Hiiii~! That much!? And not only that, it might be certain that all that cash is only a part for the transportation fee. Okay. I guess my mind's made up. I'll be travelling all parts of Japan, if possible. I don't even care on what could just happen. I just want to learn in my own way, like what Monoko did. And so, before everything, I told my parents about it and they almost fainted. But I told them why I have that thought, and they suddenly laughed it off. It can't be helped. I met a ghost and spend time with her within a week, who would believe such story? Yes. It's only you who would believe such story. And now with that settled, I took my luggage and the things that I needed at home and started my journey. A journey of where they're many uncertainties and anything simply goes, as I opened my entrance door, hitting myself with sunrays.
[Four months later: Transparent Answer]
White clouds that floats in the blue sky, nostalgic atmosphere of my hometown, and familiar places that I often or sometimes go to. . . . These are the things that have welcomed me back after my decision of going off in exile. I strolled with my luggage as I walked to where my apartment is.
"Woah. It's still hasn't changed. I'm glad." I said it as I walked. I have gone to where my room is.
"What didn't change, Shinji-kun?" A girl with a school uniform said. I have two companions on each side in tow.
"The exterior. No, the interior. Why?"
"That doesn't make sense at all." The girl with the school uniform shoved me, as my other companion was stared us, silently.
". . . . . ."
"Huh? What's wrong?" I asked my other companion as I tried to evade the girl's attacks as we walked.
". . Nothing." She said, shaking her head, as her irregular twin tails flutter from the wind. Then,
"Ok." I took my paper clips and picked my door.
*Ka-chunk!* It unlocked.
"Come on in." I invited them.
"Sorry for the intrusion." The school uniformed girl said as the other nods in agreement.
"Just put your stuffs at that side." I pointed to where it leads to my bedroom.
"Ok." Then, they put it down.
"Well, make yourself at home, ok? I got to go from somewhere, so occupy the house while I'm aren't around."
"We will. Now go to where you wanna go. We'll take care of the house." I nodded and waved at them.
I had gone to the farthest area of the town of where the cemetery is. I bought the some candles and a bouquet of flowers as I go inside. I walked and walked until I reached the Cliffside. Then, I found the unnamed tombstone.
"I'm back, Monoko." I put down the bouquet of flowers and lit the candles with matchsticks.
"Did you feel alone when I gone away from town? I'm sorry if I didn't told you when I decided to do so." I cleaned the place by brushing it off with my hands. After that, I caressed the unnamed tombstone.
"I'm ok. Don't worry. I didn't got hurt or anything since my friends is at my side." I hugged the tombstone.
"So cold." As I part myself from it. Then, I noticed an abandoned building just near at the lighthouse.
"I see. . . . Time really moves in an un-predicting way." I closed my eyes as I feel the wind, brushing my hair.
"Ahh. That gave me an idea." I went inside the abandoned building. It was a bit into shape so, I'll be fine. It won't crumbled or anything. I climbed the building up to the top floor. As I was almost at the top, I could feel the cold breeze coming from the doorway, going from the stairs. I walked towards it then,
*WOOSH!* A gust of wind welcomed my presence. I examined the rooftop. It was broad enough to execute my idea.
"This will be perfect." I sat on the edge of the rooftop, as I make paper cranes.
After an hour and a half, I finally made so much that I almost surround myself with the paper cranes that I made.
"Now to wait for it." I leaned on the fence as I wait. I looked at the sky. It was almost sunset. I sighed. Then, as I could feel that what I was waiting is here.
"This is for you, Monoko." A gust of wind blew the paper cranes towards the sky, across the fences, flying higher and higher in the sky.
"And hoping for you to reach these feelings." Little by little, the paper cranes disappeared, as the wind takes them to where It'll be headed. Don't know where, though. I stretched my arms in the air.
"Ahhh! Now that's over, time to go home. . . . Huh?" As I was going out in the building, I saw my two companions. They're leaning on the walls in each side, like bodyguards. The girl with irregular twin tails' leaning with her hands on her pockets with one foot on the wall while the others' leaning with her hands on her back.
"Are you done already?" The school uniformed girl asked.
"Yeah. So, you guys followed me here from the start?" I smiled with my eyes closed.
"Something like that." She said with a chuckle.
"I see. . . . Well, time for us to go home." As I signal them to go towards the only door of the rooftop.
"Ahhh! Shinji-kun, who was the person you visited at the cemetery? It's weird that it doesn't have a name in it."
"It's a secret."
"Ehhhh~ Come on, tell us." She persisted.
"Ok. Ok. But, I'll only say this one time, ok?" They nodded. I let out a sigh. I looked up the orange sky as I told them,
"She's. . . . my other half." As I smiled at them. Then, they looked at each other. One with the puzzled look whiles the other with a narrow look.
"What do you mean, other half?" The school uniformed girl asked.
"Now, now. Enough with that. I told you that I'll say it only once, right? Now let's go home."
"Ehhhh~ No fair." After that, we got home. And I understand that life goes as it is. Despite that we got into various obstacles, we'll end up looking at it with such happy memories that you'll be saying, "Glad that it was all over" with a smile on your face. And also, always believe onto yourself. There's no such thing is right or wrong. It's only that people who judge them is giving you a feedback, and you'll be the one to choose of those options. There's no such thing that life sucks. It's just that people with those minds have a bad reputation or bad luck. It's best for those people to try out other new things that is into their fitting. And all of these thoughts are because of Monoko, herself. She taught me the ways of how I should deal with my life. So, I'm really glad that I have met her. So what I'll be doing now will be for your sake. It's the only way of how I can express my gratitude. And I'll always love you from both heart and mind.
Transparent Answer, ended.