Is this it?

The monotonous thump?

The tedious lull of life?

Is this all that I have?

All I can look forwards to?

My heart pulls me one moment,

to your open arms.

But when they encase me...

It is like nothing is as worthless.

Do I deserve such devotion?

When I just want to flee?

Return to my quiet solidarity?

My dreary life before?

How do I know?

Am I suppose to stay or go?

I wish I cared.

That when you were besides me

I could smile as truthfully as you,

as I used to.

It was so simple

you have made it difficult.

I don't know any more.

Tell me what I'm suppose to do!

I beg and pray to feel as I should.

I know what is suppose to be,

where is it?

Why can't I feel it?