I'm tired of this.

.

When my favorite place suddenly becomes a hellhole,

Something has to change in it.

In this instance, that provoker is you.

.

You might not realize this,

But I blame everything on myself.

When you accuse others of what they are and aren't doing,

It puts stress on my life, because I can't fix it.

I dread, I panic, and I cry.

It's the natural cycle of my emotions.

.

It sucks, because I know I can't control everyone.

If I did, the world would go my way,

And would be a much better place.

I'm a perfectionist, I like to have complete control.

.

So when you shout that we're not doing enough,

I interpret it as I'M not doing enough.

I stress, and I have panic attacks.

.

Do you even realize what you said today upset me?

That just because I am not as advanced

As someone as magnificent as you,

Doesn't mean I'm going to be a screw up.

It doesn't mean that I should take the blame

Even if I've done nothing wrong.

If I remember correctly, you screwed up so bad,

YOU got called out on it, in front of everyone.

Perhaps you'd better not point fingers so early on.

.

And when you're being a bitch to my friends

Just because you are not their lives,

It's an infuriating situation.

One of them has an excuse for not being around,

And yet you act as if SHE'S the problem.

It's not fair of you; you're not her life.

.

If it wasn't that I have too many reasons

To keep my ass around you,

I would quit, would just walk out.

What would you do then?

Would you treat me as if I was the bitch,

When it was really was you?

Would you hate me just because

I was tired of the drama?

.

Probably.

.

One more year...