Living sick, living lies

What I do and I see

Like a ruthless assassin, cold in blood

My life is what I have it to be


Screening eyes around the world

Looking out for the star

In that relentless pursuit so cold

The lengths I go so far


Guilt cannot tarnish me

Else I will die

Yet this anguish consumes my very soul

For a reason I know not why


Like a spy, a peeping Tom

I break into the soul

Of the joys of solitude, the bliss of it all

Eroded by my words


A loveless, cold lie

No longer in spirit or awe

The joy it once had is gone

The excitement I once saw


What use shall it be if I cry?

And tell this whole planet who'd bestow

That I probably know way too much

Than I should possibly know?


Maybe I have no voice in words

But I know

This eroding conscience inside of me

Will someday truly show


No more, no more of it all

I shall break away

And with it goes that sickening joy

That is to be led astray


Abandon, gone- half in sight

Disappeared into the stream

Where the joy of the heart is still standing

In a swoonless, stagnant dream.