"How can I help you?"

The woman spoke slowly, as if I wasn't mentally advanced enough to understand her. Then again, according to my papers, mother, therapist, and current location, I wasn't.

"I'm a new student," I answered simply. My mother had told me specifically to go straight to the main office, so I guess I had to get some kind of papers, or a guide or something.

"Ah. Alice Kongingsburg." She hadn't even looked down at her laptop. How, exactly, had she known my name?

A strand of the woman's dark brown hair fell into her face as she stacked a group of papers and off-handedly handed them to me. "Girl's dorm is in the east. Third floor, room 627," she stated monotonously.

"Ah, thanks," I muttered, taking the papers. The woman paid no more attention to me as she turned back to her work, and I walked out of the office and down the hall, following the map to my new home.

About halfway there, I saw a boy in the middle of the otherwise empty hall. He was skinny and about my height, an albino.

"Um, hello?" I called, hoping he could lead me to my dorm.

He looked behind him and, at the sight of me, darted off, fast as a jackrabbit.

"Hey!" I struggled to run after him, but my luggage weighed me down. "Hey, I just want to talk! Come back!"

He didn't.

I sighed and gave up the effort, slowing my steps and breathing heavily. I'd never seen anyone run so fast. And why had he run from me in the first place?

Maybe it was a part of his mental illness. I'd never heard of such a diagnosis before, but you can slip into madness in many diverse ways if your imagination can stretch far enough, as Dad used to say. By ending up in here, I'd proven him right.

I eventually made it to my dorm, walking through the still-empty hallways. Where was everyone? It was a Saturday after all, and it's not like anyone here was allowed to leave campus. Were they all just sleeping in their rooms, in the middle of the day? I didn't try to puzzle too hard about the matter, however. I'd probably get my answer soon enough.

I stopped at my door: room 627. All the way at the back of the hallway.

I unlocked it and closed the door behind me. The room was pretty standard. There was a bed pushed against the wall to my left, a nightstand next to it, a desk against the wall next to me, and a TV set across from the bed, settled in between the bathroom and the sliding-door closet. There was, I noted, no window. I felt utterly and uncomfortably confined.

I shook the feeling away and began to unpack.

Before I continue, let me say a few things. Firstly, my name is Alice Kongingsburg. I am sixteen years of age. I now attend Redd Boarding School for Troubled Adolescents, due to some complicated and- for the moment- unimportant circumstances.

I would tell you many things about me. I might tell you that I have straight blonde hair and turquoise eyes, or that my favorite color is blue, or that my father died eight years ago.

But, in truth, there's really only one thing about me that you should be aware of.

I am certifiably, truly, deeply psychotic.

A/N: So, in case any of you are wondering, this IS based off of Alice in Wonderland, but differently. Not just the setting, but the characters themselves. You'll see later on.

Anyway, my first story! :D Arguably a fanfic, but I think not. The story's widely-known and considered a classic; everyone knows how it is and how it ends. I'm just adding a little twist to it. Actually, many twists. Many big twists. And a very different plot.

I know that it's pretty random here, but January is sapping my writing skills (as usual), so I have to make do with what I can. -_- It'll get better, I personally swear.

Anyway, if you think that this is a stupid idea, please review and tell me. If you think it's great, please review and tell me. Any suggestions on how I write? This personally isn't my best, but I can't seem to figure out why, and it's driving me nuts. D:

All in all, please review. :)