I remember that day like it was yesterday, although it was almost a year ago. I remember what you wore… a black tux jacket that didn't even match your light blue button up and yellow tie. You pulled it off somehow, maybe because the tie almost matched your hair and the shirt almost matched your eyes. As the night when on, you looked even better- when your hair got all sweaty and stuck to your forehead and your blue eyes teeth were even brighter with the flashing blue lights.
I remember crying when that Whitney Houston song came on, and I remember thinking you were the most handsome person on Earth, and I couldn't imagine thinking that of anyone else. You were so perfectly careless and dorky, and happy. As the night went on, I wanted that dance with you more and more. Just one dance. Just one touch of your hand.
I had my chance. When we were the only two sitting down during that slow song. I met your eyes and you stood up with a grin. My heart pounded and my hands became sweaty as I gripped my chair… but before you could make it to me, another boy did… and I couldn't say no to him. Then my best friend approached you and you danced with her.
It makes me wonder what would have happened if we would have danced. Well, I can't dance, and I was stepping all over the boy's feet… but, I mean, besides that dancing. What if you would have looked into my eyes and suddenly felt what I've been feeling for you? What if for once you could feel what I've felt? What if for some reason, you had the impulse to kiss me… or if I would have tried to kiss you? Or what if we just danced, like the acquaintances we were… what would I be regretting now?
Maybe it's best we didn't dance. I might've ruined your shoes by stepping on them, or embarrassed you in front of your buddies. Or I might have passed out from rapid heartbeat and lightheadedness. You might have felt my sweaty hands, and seen the embarrassment on my face. Maybe things would be worse for me, because I would have that moment with you- because every little good moment I've had with you only hurts now. More than the numerous bad times. Because those good moments gave me hope.
And they still do.