A heavy, downhearted sigh escaped Shaylan's mouth as she lightly stirred the now cold chocolate in front of her as if it were her current mood. All that bubbly foam once resting alike a cloud had dissolved into the murky brown liquid. She forlornly watched her weak hand as it barely managed to grip the spoon just like she barely managed to grip her cold emotions of anger and sorrow pulsing through her veins. Everything seemed to be a concoction only a dream could come up with. There has been so much strife thus far and now this; surely it is not real. But no, this was real. And, today was not her day for good news.
The café seemed unusually busy for a Saturday afternoon. Although it may have been the gloomy atmosphere isolated to Shaylan and Taylor's table amplifying the happiness of everyone else. Cherry faces met and talked of wonders and fun. Even the tired old ladies with their thick brightly coloured glasses, and wrinkled old faces seemed to be high on life. What about all those staff members? They too were wearing the famous Café Choice smile proud and true. Perhaps is was the cocoa coloured signed swinging above the opened doors welcoming all sorts that was exhibiting enormous amounts of energy to be absorbed. Only everyone else was taking it all and leaving none for their tiny little table at the back where the two friends sat with cold drinks before them as the discussed matters of a serious, friendship jeopardizing nature.
Her hand began to faze into a state of pure weakness as the spoon slowly became heavier and harder to maintain a grip. Setting the spoon at the side of her cup she stared Taylor in the eye as a weary tired expression formed on her usually friendly face. "So, you're just going to let them go."
So far, Taylor has managed to maneuver in such a way eye contact was avoid able. However this time it was impossible. In one seemingly careless motion she brushed the long luscious locks of autumn coloured hair extensions out of her face confidently. However, those green eyes betrayed her, yelling how much her heart was tearing itself into tiny shreds over this matter. She turned to her friend with a stubborn expression on her pale face. It was a fake stubborn expression. "Well I don't want the things."
She huffed. "It'll be a drag."
Shaylan managed to add extra forcefulness to her voice. Being loud, it's something that scared her very heart. She always struggled with such like things since the accident many years ago. "Basic human rights, the right to life."
The stubbornness of Taylor weakened with those cold words of what she is doing. Even she felt uneasy about the situation. But, her lifestyle desperately required she not have one of those blasted things dragging her down. That's all it'll do, drag her down and ruin everything. No more parties, no more one night stands, no more hanging out with friends like right now except talking about happier things. Her life will revolve around those little rats' lives, and right now she has the opportunity to prevent them from ever existing. So, why no stop it while she can?
And besides, it's not like it can feel or think or anything, so it's not really human. It's just a bunch of stupid body cells inside of her. If it's not human or even really alive, it's not murder. What it really is a prevention method? It is preventing her from having to deal with one of those things in her life. Non-living things don't matter. She'd better get rid of it before it becomes alive. Otherwise she will be responsible for it and everything it does. And, it will cost a fortune, a fortune that could be better spent on beer and clothes not books and toys.
Besides, it won't have a happy life living with her. It will be miserable. Most of the time she won't be around to mother it or care for it. She'll be off doing more important things like living. And, it'll be dressed in rags because she'll need money for alcohol and clothes. Food will be an issue. Why should she buy food for something she doesn't want to exist? Taylor doesn't love it. It means absolutely nothing to her. All Shaylan is doing is trying to convince her of emotions that are inexistent towards the insignificant thing.
Taylor lightly connected each fingertip with it's corresponding one before her face the same as when businessmen discuss business matters. That's all this is to her, business. And, she needed something between herself and Shaylan, anything to protect her from the fullness of wisdom and knowledge threatening to bring about a mind changing. Shaylan's eyes, her blue, blue eyes so deep with so much sorrow and regret from her past and the anger and pain this situation is inflicting on her. If it weren't for that accident, she wouldn't have such a penetrating stare. With words sitting on the tip of her tongue, just ready to jump out and join their conversation, that would only torture Shaylan further, a barrier was more than needed.
They had to be said. It was necessary. "It's not alive yet."
Fire ignited in the eyes of Shaylan. "Just because they aren't born, doesn't mean they're not alive," her harsh words drilled into Taylor. They viciously tugged at her heart. "You were at that stage once too. If you're parents had gotten an abortion you wouldn't be here. It's not fair on your unborn baby to never see sunlight."
"Well, I'm not going to bother with taking care of it, so it's better it never exists."
"Your baby does exist, Taylor. They are inside you right now."
Taylor clenched a clump of the table cloth within her green nail painted hand and managed a cold stare into the eyes of her best friend across from her. Shaylan, she has always been wise since the accident, it gave her a new perspective on life. This wise state of mind she has now obtained is so hard to ignore, and even harder to defy. Everything she says is right, but you just don't want to listen. "Well, I regret to inform you that tomorrow at four o'clock this 'baby'," Taylor made speech marks around the word baby, "is going to be terminated."
"Don't Taylor," her eyes were a deep well of knowledge and wisdom. "You will regret it."
"We'll see!" At that, Taylor stormed from the café leaving Shaylan being watched by a crowd of unknown individuals with their curious and disturbed eyes.
Shaylan sighed self-consciously in her saddened state as she slouched down into her seat. Wearily her eyes wondered towards the whiteness of the coffee cup before her. It's so white and clean on the outside, without a mark in view. Though inside it contained a disgusting, murky brown sludge you might find at a swamp. The whiteness was what drew her attention. What does white mean? Happiness? Purity? Innocence? It would be lovely to have some of that back into her life.
Taylor's chair scraped along the concrete floor as a stranger pulled it back and took her seat. Shaylan didn't bother a glance up, that's what a happy person would do and she was not happy. Besides, she would be leaving soon, so what's the point? And, what could this stranger bring to her life to cheer her up, especially considering her friend is planning to commit an act as bad as murder only legal?
"Would you like a coffee?" The stranger asked kindly, "my treat."
Shaylan shook her head before standing up, still avoiding a glance at this person. "I'm leaving now."
It's really quite interesting how circumstances lead to this moment. Stumbling against the harsh, biting wind that howled like mad dogs, while the heavy rain beat her with their stinging slaps against her skin. They drenched her to the bone with their freezing cold water, and blurred her vision to a mere few feet. This weather hated her to it's very core and wanted nothing more than to see he fall down in defeat. And, weather even chose the perfect time, a time when she is at her weakest to unleash his fury and power onto her.
Earlier today she had visited her boy friends house out of pure want to see him. While the weather had been nice she skipped along eager to see his face as it greets hers. Only, instead of being greeted by the joyful, lovable face of Tommy May, aged 28, a girl around sixteen or seventeen answered the door wearing nothing but one of his shirts. The first thing that girl said upon seeing her involve Tommy having sex with her and cheating on Shaylan. And now, Tommy is her boy friend. A quick call to him revealed the girl had indeed slept with Tommy, however he had no feelings for her.
Work called also, with more bad news. They were salary cutting and laying-off due to financial issues. Now, finding a job is an issue.
Rent has been moved up as well, more financial issues. She has one week to cough up $300 or be evicted.
A call from Gisborne alerted her to the tragedy of her mother being diagnosed with Alzheimer's and is slowly forgetting everything and everyone.
She had invited Taylor to the café, not so Taylor could unload on her, but so she could unload on Taylor for once. However, like always, Taylor had something dramatic going on in her life and, as a good friend does, Shaylan put Taylor's dramas before her own. It's easier on everyone if they can unload on her and not have to worry about it. It is not fair to unload yourself on people who have their own worries to deal with. Why make them worry about two persons' strife when they can worry about one?
The person who had taken the seat across from her hadn't even registered a second thought in Shaylan's mind. She had completely forgotten about them like they never existed. After all, what are the chances of ever seeing them again? Especially if soon she will have to move out, most likely to Gisborne, and stay with family until she finds a new job. So, what's the point in meeting new people if you're just going to lose contact very shortly?
Her front door seemed so far from the gate as she barely managed the walk there. Forcefully she dragged herself in an almost impossible way. The clothes drenched were heavy with the water weighing her down. All of her toes, and fingers and also her nose were numb due to the present chill. But at last she was home sweet home, and able to have a nice warm shower and a hot cup of coffee to be rid of that coldness looming around her.