It starts with a girl, with ponytails and two hands; eight fingers, two thumbs, some toes and a little pink nose. She was youngish and her blonde hair sometimes looked grey in the light. She wanted to be a ballerina when she grew up, or a princess, but her parents made sure she was never too hopeful.

There's moments in childhood when the mind flits between dreams, when they know what they want inside, and then find another. They can do anything they want, they can be anything they want to be. What is it that forces them to lose those dreams? When does the ballerina stop believing they can be a tap dancer?

One day he put on his tap shoes and danced around the house, cracking the tiles and singing away the moths. Who knew how he could one day be an astronaut and fly to the moon whilst gazing around at stars with dancing people called Marty.

Our ponytail girl, now she was a pretty girl, quite pretty, absolutely gorgeous as her parents would say. She stopped believing them though when they started calling her sister gorgeous. But she's ugly, she would say, she's not gorgeous. You're both gorgeous. She didn't see anything beautiful about her sister. Gorgeous means ugly then. Of course not. She didn't like being called gorgeous. She grew though, as any person would. Age could not be defied by her as slowly, she lost her innocence. To some she lost her beauty, to others she gained it.

She meet a woman from the red part of town, glazed in pettiness.

"You could be a right picture you know girl."

"What do you mean?"

"Slash you up with some powder, cut that skirt and you could be pitch perfect."

"I don't want that."

"You got too much pride, is that it?"

"No. I just don't want that."

"What are you doing around here then, looking for your own doll?"

"I'm not really sure."

"So you are looking for a little grub."

"I have to get going."

"Bet you need it, that's why you're here. You need some dough. Parents push you out, that it?"

"My parents are royalty."

"Then what are you doing here?"


As he surrounded around her she asked herself that question. Why was she there when her father wore a crown and her mother a ringlet of gold?


When was the last time you saw your parents?

I can't remember.


"We'll have to change your name." She hated seeing the glazed woman, but yearned for the companion in her.

"I like my name."

"Tarnell? It's a hags name."

"It's a princess's name."


One day her parents would come and sweep her off her feet. She was just waiting, waiting for them to return.


When did you last talk to your parents?

I don't know.


She thought about her dreams. I'll be a ballerina when I'm older, or a princess. She wanted to be the ballerina, but her parents never enrolled her in ballet classes. They wanted her to be the princess. It wasn't hard, them being a king and queen and all. It wasn't until she was older that she realised what they were, she only remembered her first memories as normal.

What was your home like?
I don't remember a castle.

How can a dream stop being a dream and start being a hope.


Words are but word

Whilst whistles are like whistles

A song is a poem

But a story is a dream

A life may be little

But a year is a lifetime

And then in some weird occurrence in this

odd world of ours, things are different

Different how? I hear you ask.

Well different because I am here

And you are not

Different because I want my life to be different

And not the long suffering you possess in it

So whilst a bird may be a feather

A sand may be a grit

I am me and you are you.


When was the last time your parents said they loved you?

I'm not sure.

A/N To begin with, thank you very much for reading this first chapter. This is a novel that I do plan on finishing, someone's got to hold me to that now though. I've got to say now that there may be certain questions you wish to ask that if I answer, it will spoil it. So please if I tell you that I can't answer one of your questions don't be offended or think anything of it. But please feel free to ask, you never know. Also I have had so many formatting issues with this, and in the end it's not how I wanted it to end up but I can't do anything about it, so if you do see any problems or things that don't look right please tell me so I can attempt to fix it. I might mention that the chapters mean nothing, there just where I've decided to put a break, but its no significance. And lastly, I've got a survey going that I'm going to use the information for a part later in the story so if you could do it that would be just amazing. And it's not going to give anything away really about the story either, so you don't need to be worried about that. I haven't been able to post the link here but at the bottom of my profile page you can find it.

So thank you very very much for reading, I hope you read on and above all, I hope you enjoy.