Civil Warfare

Write me an endless list
Of my ambiguous sins,
As my soul it fades
And my blood it thins.

How ironic.
You gave me life and
Now, as if realising your mistake,
You're draining it out of me again.

You sit there weeping
On your throne of gold –
You can do no wrong,
Or so I'm told.

Forgive me while I don't
Fucking believe you.

You brandish before me your rights of ownership
To your sacred moral high ground;
But I don't care about your words,
Their shape or form or sound.

Because you are not
In control of you.

The poison it maddens your eyes
And your heart;
I've lost the war
Before it can start.

You match my machine gun
With canon fire.
There is no equality.
Well all is fair in love and war,
And I'm just a sinful civilian.

Our world has caught on ruinous fire,
And there's nowhere safe to hide –
Nowhere safe for the girl who is
So frightened, so scared inside.

I died that night,
Did you know?

My scars split open
And my blood gushed anew,
Through the thin white gates
That were carved by you.

I'll bleed to death here
On the floor,
Too exhausted from this civil war.

Beneath my mattress I have crumpled
The most terrible note –
The most painful secret
I ever wrote.

I'm sorry.
I still love you.