Jack met mom and Gemma. It was the weirdest thing ever and it went a little something like this.
Me: Jack, stop fucking touching me. Seriously, not in front of her.
Jack: Oh come on, Rhodey. At least then there won't be any confusion. She'll totally know we're fucking.
Jack: Oh, look, she's home!
Me: oh my god oh my god oh my god -
Jack: Hi, Ms. Woodley.
Mom: (confused) Hello...?
Gemma: (bluntly) Who are you?
Jack: I'm Jack Casey, Rhodey's boyfriend.
Mom: (looking at me) Rhodey?
Gemma: (dying of laughter)
Me: (not breathing)
Mom: Well, uh, it's very nice to meet you, Jack. Are you staying for dinner, we're having make-it-yourself tacos night.
Jack: Oh, sweet! Yes, I'm staying.
Gemma: (smirking) Is Rhodey a good boyfriend, Jack?
Jack: Of course he is.
Gemma: (in the voice of Satan) Has he sucked your -
Mom: Gemma! (drags Gemma into house)
Jack: Well, that went well. Right? Rhodey?
So yeah. I breathed into a brown paper bag, Jack went into the house to help mom and Gemma make the fixings for tacos, and we ate on the patio in the backyard and ended up playing Spades and other card games until it got really dark out.
Once mom got tired, she said she was going to call Phil then go to bed. Gemma had long since grown bored of hanging out with us on the patio and ended up going inside, chattering away on her cellphone to some girl she hangs out with at school. Mom bid Jack and I a good night and left us on the patio. Jack's staying the night.
"It's nice out here," Jack says, placing a Jack, Queen, King, and an Ace down simultaneously on the ten in one of the piles, drawing four more cards from his deck. "It's like, outside but inside at the same time."
I cracked a smile. "Yeah, I guess." I glance out through the screen to my backyard. "It's going to start snowing soon."
"I don't mind, I like the snow."
"Ugh, I hate it."
"What?" Jack asks, sounding appalled. I take his moment of shock to slap down my entire hand and grab up five more. Jack gets going after that, but keeps running his mouth. "How can you possibly hate snow? You don't go sledding or have snowball fights?"
I wrinkle my nose. "I don't like the cold."
"Yeah, but. Snow." he says like that's some kind of reason.
I snort. "It's fine, Jack. Not everyone likes snow."
"I know," he says, sounding morose. "Which is so sad. Snow is the greatest, I swear. I'm totally taking you sledding with me this year. Christine and I go sledding all the time."
"Thanks for the offer, but I'm good."
"No you're not, but that's okay. I'll show you the error of your ways. We'll make a date out of it."
I don't notice when Jack freezes abruptly because I see my opportunity and I slap down the rest of my cards, smirking triumphantly and leaning back.
"Speed." I proclaim proudly. This is when I notice Jack's lack of movement. "Hey, Jacky, what's wrong?"
He seems to snap out of it when I address him directly.
"We've never been on a date, Rhodey."
I sit back, eyebrows drawn together. "So?"
"So," Jack says, sounding scandalized, though I've no idea what for. "We need to. Take me out, Rhodey. Make me feel special."
I laugh. Because, holy shit, he sounded so fucking creepy just then.
"Yeah," I snort. "I'll definitely take you out being a total creeper like that."
Jack pouts. "I'm being serious,"
"Oh." I clear my throat a little sheepishly. "Well, I mean, I would. If I had the money, that is. I've been really short on money lately, especially after I bought Assassin's Creed III for Cole."
A slow, devious grin spreads across Jack's face, and not for the first time, I'm reminded that Jack Casey is in fact a motherfucking psychopath. In his stupid leather jacket for no reason, because no one fucking wears leather jackets anymore except for those girls that shop at Delia's and Forever 21.
Actually. I think Jack shops at Forever 21.
"What?" I ask warily. "What the fuck's that face for?"
Jack pushes himself out of his chair and saunters over to me around the table. Once he gets near enough, he straddles my lap, and puts his smirking face real close to my own. My body responds almost automatically to him, but my mind and my eyes are over at the patio door, hoping mom or Gemma won't happen to need something and come out here while Jack's in my lap.
Jack reaches a hand down into his jeans pocket and slips something out of it. That something turns out to be a twenty dollar bill that he waves in my face.
"I've got some extra cash lying around," he says, sounding way too innocent for such a devious expression. "I wouldn't mind giving it to you if it meant you'd use it to take me out on a date."
I blink a few times and nod. "Uh, sure. Okay. Thanks, I guess - "
"But," and this is where the trick comes into play. "You'll have to earn the twenty."
Realization blossoms in my mind at an alarming speed and once it's fully materialized, what exactly he's referring to, I choke on my own spit and clutch his shirt, spluttering into his jacket. He's such a fucking douche, I swear to God.
"Jack Casey," I state firmly once I'm done choking. "I am not going to suck your dick for twenty dollars."
Jack pulls another twenty from his pocket along with a ten.
"Fifty and you have to let me come on your face."
Well, fifty's a pretty hard bargain.
"Yes!" Jack cheers.
I roll my eyes and get to work.
a/n: Ahhh, that's the end. Going out the way we started. I loved writing this story and I loved the reaction I got from everyone, you were all so great. Hopefully we can all come together again in another one of my stories (probably Hero Worship, I'm not sure about that one yet) or something else.
Also, quickly before I go for goodness knows how long; how would you all feel about little one-shots about Rhodey and Jack Casey and their adventures into being boyfriends? Is that something people would be interested in at all? They wouldn't really be connected like a storyline or anything, more like semi-connected one shots and episodes in random (not chronological) moments in their lives. So let me know about that in a review or in a pm, whichever, and to keep up with me (if that's something you'd be interested in) come over to my tumblr and we can chat! The link is in my profile.