You Had It All

You left us.

Do you think
Writing of your love
And redefining the word "overkill"
With your kisses
In pre-written fonts and
In size twelve type
Is enough to make up
For everything you stole
Without even
Thinking about it.

Without a backwards glance,
Or without a thought
For anyone but yourself.

You stole our childhoods.
You threw away any respect
We had for you.
And our love simply leaked
Out of the holes you left
In our beating hearts.

And don't tell me
That you and mummy just
"Fell out of love",
Because it's not so simple
As that.
And you didn't try.
You didn't even try to fix it,
Did you?

Where were you, Daddy,
When I needed you?
When I wanted a hug
Or needed someone to stand up for me,
Or someone to tell me
That everything would be alright?
Where are my happy memories, Daddy?

They're in the past.
And they're scarce.
Just like you.

You didn't think about that, did you?
But, then again, you never thought much
About anything.
You were too busy drunk out of your mind
Or high off God-Knows-What
And sprawled across a vomit covered sofa,
Snoring whilst I tried to show you
The drawing I'd done at school that day.

You'd only wake up to wrench me from my dreams,
With wandering hands and stale breath
That stank of last night's lager of choice,
And bring the nightmares upon me yourself.

You never thought about anything.

…Apart from those other women
You had wrapped around
Your little finger.

You put your money on
Secrecy and lies, perversion
And thievery.
On drink and drugs and
Whores and luck itself.
And they all failed you
The way you failed me.