Dodging the Loveseats (A poem that makes fun of love)

Here comes the log!

Oh come and look!

I nearly dodged that one!

What crazy seat!

I was only spared, but not quite.

I was hit on the arm.

Could I really object?

I have loveseats thrown at me!

There they come, tumbling down!

There like the ape with his barrels.

I can't keep up!

I might just die!

Oh my! Who might just be the guy?

Ha I see it, who it is!

It's not who I expect

It's kinda funny, really!

I smirk at him and he laughs.

Like a game, I challenge him.

He accepts and it's on!

We're both on the line!

I stand and try to avert my focus

I see he's trying to distract me

I sneeze on him and he backs away

That's just not the end of it!

He tries harder and more quickly

I try to tire him out

Like a predator he has his gaze on me...

I've gotta puke already!

The look on his face makes me sick!

I'd rather puke then die!

I'd rather drown inside!

I'd rather implode my mind!

It blows my mind like that!

What is he thinking?!

Is he on crack?

Has he gone over the crow's nest?

It's sweet, but disgusting.

It's pleading, but degrading.

It's longing, but disgraceful.

It's loving, but discouraging.

I'd rather not look.

I wouldn't last long.

I'd probably drown already

I'd probably bathed in my own vomit already.

Know that I can't stand him

It's really ridiculous thing

ARGH, why is he SO LAME?

Why did he have to pick me?

Why did it have to be me?

How did I get here?!

I wouldn't know!

But I play to win this game!

He'll see! I'll beat him good!

He won't see it coming!

Ooooh, I've got a secret weapon!

I came, and I came to play and WIN!