3/14/13: Poem

Someday IS Today

When my heart got broken,

I didn't think I would get over it

I thought that I had to keep re-living

My pain every day as he ignored me

And gave me the cold shoulder

(And paraded his new relationship around)

Because I'd been Foolished enough

To Dream Outloud

Because I had dreamed too much,

Expected too much out of the world

I'd expected for my world to be like those dreams I dreamt

And those stories I wrote.

But Today I can say

That I've happily moved past it

And come to look forward to crushing on other boys,

But because of him,

I've made sure to always Keep My Heart Close to avoid future suffering.

Nowadays, I see him daily

In the hallways, in the cafeteria

A couple days ago he even stood next to me as I got lettuce,

And it wasn't that bad,

Really, I didn't feel anything but pride in myself and a feeling of relief.

(When I'm around him, I sometimes think to myself,

"Do you see how beautifully I've grown?

Do you see what you could have had,

But decided to reject?"

Then I remind myself that the bitterness

Won't change the past.

And that I'm better off than if we would have had a relationship,

But I guess that my ego has yet to have so easily

Forgotten and forgiven a person that had hurt

And humiliated me for months.)

Nowadays, I still feel a little weird around him

(I think it would have been abnormal if I didn't)

I feel as if there is an aura around him,

Like a storm waiting to be cooked up

And it screams at me, "Danger! Danger!"

And he has yet to make a move to talk to me,

But I don't really care,

It really doesn't it matter anyway

And if there ever is a time in the future where we have to work together

(For whatever reason)

I'll keep my cool and try to start on a new slate

For the sake of his sanity as well as mine

And I might even gain a brand new friendship,

A brand new chance with him—

Though I strongly doubt it.