A/N: So I wrote these when I was thinking of my ex-best friend. Some days I really really wish we were still friends; other days... Let's just say that if his middle name started with an "S," then his initials would perfectly describe how he's been acting toward me recently. But he was one of the best friends I'll ever have, and I really miss him. Sometimes. (And if you know who I'm talking about, there's no need to say it.)

I'm sure if you've ever lost a friend, you can understand how I feel: even if s/he was a total jerk, you still want them back. As a friend.

"I Miss You"

Laughing like we did—

Oh! far off, those long-lost days—

Now you ignore me

Yet I look back secretly;

Just can't help reminiscing.

.

We were but children,

Hearts open for all to see.

Little did I know

That one day this pure friendship

Would not be self-sustaining.

.

The work that it takes

To make you acknowledge me:

Is it all worth it?

For us to walk side-by-side,

Today, it would feel so strange.

Wish this year had never come!

.

Dreams of happy days:

Your smile, your laugh; tears you shed;

His just aren't the same!

No one e'er could replace you

In my life, or in my heart.


"If You Only Understood"

I wouldn't miss you.

Wouldn't have to; you'd be here

Laughing like you do;

Teasing me the way you did.

Why must all things change?

.

Listening to songs

That all seem to speak of you.

Yet it doesn't hurt;

I don't mind thinking of you—

That is, in my ideal world.

.

Remembering now

Fairy tales and fantasies

In which you're the prince

Who's just friends with the princess

And fine like that, unlike you.

.

I don't need saving.

It's not a boyfriend I want;

Just someone who I

Can depend on as my friend.

If only you understood!


"Pain"

Sitting—standing—running—stumbling—

Even the pain of falling is sweet;

'Least I've something to focus on

As I get back to my feet.

.

Something to focus on, other than

The fact that you are not here—

You said you'd be; you said you'd come!

Oh! what I'd give to have you near.

.

Even if we shouted, argued

At least you'd be acknowledging me

Not pretending you didn't realize

Your ex-best friend stands here, waiting for you to see.

.

Don't ignore me! Just wave hello

Or nod or say "hi"! Just let me know

That my friend still stands there, being himself

Instead of some too-cool kid putting on a show.


A/N: Constructive criticism is always welcome. Just remember, though, I paid attention to every syllable and any mistakes I made are likely intentional and serve a purpose. If you'd like an explanation of any of the backstory for any of these, I'd be happy to respond to a PM or review.