With all of this discovering who I really am, I tend to not look at things that are happening around me. But when I saw him I knew truth. It wasn't just truth but

beautiful truth in a shining light. The thing that made me see him was the red in his black as night hair. Like fire on coals just waiting for when it can burn out. I

can't remember his eyes because I loved them. I loved them so much that my brain blocked the memory of them. Maybe though it's for the best. So I can't paint

my nails that exact shade or find a shirt that reminds me of them. But I miss their brilliance and luminescent quality that had me at hello. But maybe if I hadn't

been so blinded I would have seen his true faults and cracks in his sanity that ended up causing pain to mine. He had a girl, truth be told he always had a girl. A

pretty girl with her hair just right And her nails ready to kill. So I became his friend and left it there to never resurface. He of course flirted because that was in his

nature. When he was finally single, he was truly dangerous. An looking back I had no hope. It was eleven months of pure bliss that led to the coldest winter I've

ever had. Because he took everything from me and there are some things you can't get back. He took everything, then got bored with what he had. So he began

talking to another that he could manipulate like a puppet using her heart strings. I feel sorry for her I truly do. Because I've been there, and I know how he

plays. I won, one of the lucky few, I left him and he didn't like that. So why do I feel like I am a tainted victor and that it wasn't worth the cost?