I am but a crumbled fortress

Looking to be anything but another ruin

Longing to live,

Longing to breathe,

I am but a masked cardinal

Surrounding my being in a canvas of charisma

To shelter my bleeding spirit

To bury my insecurities

In a crypt of failure

Failure to dazzle

Failure to fit the harmony

Failure to reflect

The man I am inside

No, I am no man,

Not to anyone

I will never pass for a perfect son

Or a perfect boyfriend,

I can't even seem to be a good friend

Oh how I let my demons govern my thoughts

I am imperfection to the core

Though I can only blame myself

One job, I had but one job,

Born black, act 'white'

As different as night and day

I had one job, but one job,

Be a Christian, Be a tool,

Go to College or we are done with you

One job, I had but one job

'Can't join us then leave us'

Snickers voiced strong

In goes my head in the sea of relief,

But out I pull it far too weak to complete

Attention-seeker I am, Desperate to be acknowledge

I would be anything you wanted

I am a being of many masks

Though I never mastered anything

So I can't seem to hide my face

Though I have tried

Yet if I were to be myself,

I would lose the love I so crave

No, No, I cannot afford to lose you

My powerful flame which gives me life

I would be cold and dead as Absolute Zero

Without your passion causing friction

"You're perfect the way you are"

Then how could I not be enough

There must be an issue with me

Problems that can be met with nothing

Nothing, nothing but rebuff

No, I must be imcomplete

How can one be perfect and not enough

No, if you truly knew me, if you truly saw me,

You'd want nothing to do with me

If you knew of the voices that haunt my dreams,

If you knew of the thoughts that curse me with grief,

If you knew of the disorders that cram inside my brain,

You'd hate me pass infinity, and toss me aside

I was born with one purpose and one alone

I will wear any mask you want, any at all,

As long as my face brings you happiness

My reflection can be anything you see fit

I don't even need to recognize it at all