Death Shall Be My Dénouement

Various valedictions will be made
if I let it come.
Yet I yearn for it to come
and end my pain
The pain that's plagued my entire life, the pain that consists of various pains.
Betrayal, loneliness, humiliation, regret, obstinacy, megalomania, hatred
—These are the feelings that inhabit my mind.
They empower me, weaken me, reassure me, agonize me.
This they've done throughout my life.
Hence my tumultuous state of mind.
Is there a way to end my agony?
For years I've wondered why
For years I've tried to expel my malice
Why do I even suffer?
Why does nothing improve?
This I've wondered for eternity, most recently due to my deplorable tests.
They simply fill me with detest.
Is there a way to fix this?
Is there a way to end this?
Is there a solution?
There is one possible way:
Death shall end everything
Death shall be my dénouement.
I should engage in self-destruction
Because death shall be my dénouement.