Warning: This story contains soiling diapers/goodnites. It also includes a teen acting like a baby. However, this story does not include the sexual fantasy side of the teen baby community. I wrote this story to help those understand it better and hopefully realize not all of it is sexual.

It was nearly three in the morning. I screamed at the top of my lungs as I shook my head and flapped my arms. I rocked vigorously back and forth, doing my best to calm myself down. I hated having horrible bad dreams about my past at this time of the night. My brain struggled to fight off the awful thoughts plaguing inside of me.

My foster mother, Rebecca came running into my room. She tried to comfort and cradle me in her arms by slowly rocking me. I ended up biting and clawing her, then I shoved her away. I didn't mean to do these things, but I had no control over my current actions either.

"Fiona, it's okay... it was just a dream..." she said with a soothing, reassured tone.

I continued rocking myself and screamed nonstop. Suddenly, I caught the scent of an awful odor coming from my goodnite; one I knew all too well. Mom could smell it too, and she figured I needed to be changed. Once I calmed down, I lay on a changing pad to be put in a fresh diaper.

I only wore them at night due to my disabling bad dreams. They were always about my real parents treating me like dirt. I never got the childhood I should have had growing up. This made my life miserable, even after going into foster care. Later, I was diagnosed with post traumatic stress disorder before Rebecca had adopted me.

I had other problems along the way, including autism and developmental delays. Mom pulled off my goodnites and waved her hand over her nose. I giggled innocently at her for doing that to make me laugh. She cleaned up me up and placed me in two fresh goodnites, just in case I had another night terror.

"There! You are all changed and clean," she smiled at me.

I crawled back into bed and sat there rocking again. Mom took me in her arms, cradled me like a baby and rocked with me. This was enough to put me to sleep after a little time and effort. I didn't have another bad dream, but I did pee in my goodnites during sleepy time.

I had only wished she'd put me in diapers. Considering I had to wear two goodnites meant that they weren't working for me. They were only good for the little night time pee dribbles, not for soiling during horrible night terrors. I guess I preferred the feel of diapers instead of these lousy underwear style pull ups.

Morning finally came. I changed out of my wet goodnites and into some panties. I pulled on some jeans and let out a deep sigh. Next came the sports bra because I couldn't wear regular ones, at least not with my severe sensory issues. I pulled on a Sea World t-shirt, then I brushed out my hair gently and slowly.

I headed into the kitchen where mom's biological seventeen year old daughter sat. Her name was Madelyn, and that's what she preferred people to call her. Madelyn didn't have any special needs of her own to deal with. She did understand the ones I had though. I was adopted into their home when I was about ten, and I was fourteen now.

"How did you sleep?" Madelyn asked me with a smile.

"Okay, but I woke up in two wet goodnites though," I said, knowing I had to tell mom the truth.

"Did you really? That's a little weird. I mean, with your night terrors I can understand..." she raised her eyebrow, only to shrug it off. "We'll have to get you some more later," she nodded as I let out another huge sigh.

"Mom, why won't you let me just wear diapers at night? They absorb more, and I think you'd deal with less changing at night," I tried to explain to her.

"You're a little old to wear diapers," she said, not really understanding my reasons for them. "I think two goodnites work just fine. If you want, I can get you those Fluttershy plastic pants you wanted the other day," she smiled, thinking it would remedy my situation.

I nodded at her without trying to explain my real reasons. I didn't quite understand why I wanted to wear diapers all of a sudden. Perhaps it was due to the fact that I got out of them so quickly as a toddler. Mom knew a lot about my past, but I could tell she wasn't the type to let something like that slide either.

"Why do you want to wear diapers?" Madelyn blinked at me as I looked down.

I really couldn't explain to them my reasons without coming off as weird. I felt as though these thoughts in my head were abnormal and strange. I didn't understand why I was even having them all of the time. I wanted them to stop so I could live a normal teenage life.

"I don't really know," I said, continuing to look down.

After eating breakfast, we headed to the drugstore. I followed mom inside when I spotted My Little Pony training pants that I had to have. Mom bought them, along with some goodnites too. I still wished I could get diapers, but I decided to keep my mouth shut. I noticed some pacifiers that looked really cute, only I knew how babyish they were.

These thoughts were strange to me, and I didn't know why I had them. I didn't know whether to encourage them or suppress them either. I mean, the more I tried to shake them off, the worse they seemed to get. I didn't know how much longer I could keep them hidden though. It would have been nice if someone shared my feelings.

"Is something wrong?" mom asked when we headed out to the car.

"Huh? Oh, yeah," I nodded and faked a smile.

"I hope you aren't still thinking of wearing diapers," she sighed and shook her head.

"I'm not..." I said while staring out the window with a scowl.

I didn't understand why she didn't want me wearing diapers though. It would make my life easier not having to wear two goodnites. I soiled them pretty badly, and I was lucky I didn't soil my bed. I guess it was just some reason for me to wish I had diapers.