A/N: First time writing, yay! This was an idea I'd been rolling around in my head for a while now, and I'm eager to see where it goes. Heavy influences are taken from The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy by Douglas Adams, The Hydrogen Sonata by Iain M. Banks, and A Certain Scientific Railgun by Kazuma Kamachi.


Prologue


Entering secure orbit of Solitari. Orbit Speed: 11.2 km/s. Debris Level: Clear. Linear distance to target: 0.7 Earthly Astronomical Units.

The on-board computer woke me from my dozing. I slowly got to my feet. Despite being slightly fatigued, my body surged with energy once I remembered why I was out here in the first place. I was going to win the game today, at any cost. What game? Why, kick the can, of course. A brutish, primitive game, dating back to history far before even stellar travel, sure, but an effective game to train us artificial life forms nonetheless. In my institution, no offense team had yet won a game of kick the can. With better and better shield technology coming out every day, getting past the shields to kick the can and win was nigh impossible. But I've always been an out of the box thinker. The series of androids which I came from are known as the X-25, we were made by and have allegiance solely to humans. Male humanoids with an average build and black hair, we have one unique talent: We are anaerobic. Practically put, we are self conscious life forms which can live in space with no aid. Consequently, we have many uses, like- I'm getting off track, sorry. Anyway, while my comrades below me try to break though in vain, I had ventured up into space to try my luck from here. Solitari was a pretty planet, a pure dark blue gas giant with thin, black atmospheric lines circling the poles. As I half-heartedly gazed at it, a human voice brought me to my senses once more.

"Yo, your jump is in thirty seconds. You ready?"

"Yeah, yeah. Don't bug me, Charles." Charles, a tall, spiky haired blond; he was never seen without his shades and his killer moustache. One of my only friends from outside of the institution, he was watching the drama unfold after the game began, and evidently wanted me to win, so when I explained my idea to him, he dragged me off. An hour later, I'm about to jump off his ship in a reckless effort to topple that blasted can.

3. 2. 1.

I jump.

Instantly my preset course activates, and I start boosting toward Solitari at ridiculous speeds. I can already feel the intense gravity starting to take hold, and my instincts are telling me to boost in the opposite direction, but I know that everything has already been calculated down to the nanosecond. My speed is picking up rapidly.

Now exceeding 12 km/s.

Expectedly, gravity lurched me away from Solitari to one of its now rapidly approaching moons, the name of which I forget.

After gravity - hopping a few moons, I had reached a sufficient speed to (probably) break the barriers protecting the can, and so I soared right at a neighboring planet, my destination, Trinity. It is named so because of the three equiangular moons circling it.

ETA 20 minutes.

I started pondering the world around me. (Yes, I'm that kind of person, don't judge.)

According to my databases, around 5 years ago humanity first came into contact with other forms of life. After that law and order had been turned into disarray even as scientific discoveries skyrocketed. We quickly found that the theory that only 10% of the brain is used at any time was true, and were able to unlock the brain's full potential with help from alien technology. In crude terms, some developed 'superpowers' of sorts. Of course, the way this 90% would express itself varied with the epigenetic switch order of the individual, leading to vastly different abilities. In the end, however, this only served to amplify the confusion humanity faced in the relatively recent onslaught of new extraterrestrials (odd that people still use this term, because everything is so interconnected that the original meaning becomes obsolete...sorry, getting off track again), be they benevolent or otherwise. I was only created a year ago, but I can tell this is the most chaotic time in our history. (Because I'm artificial intelligence created by humans, I'm basically considered a human too.)

ETA 1 minute.

I gathered my strength. It was time to kick that can!

"Hey, you've got some low-orbit space debris coming in hot." Charles' voice came through from my communication module. I thought had to reason to worry, for my impact shields were up. I guess my 'perfect' AI memory was flawed, because-

WHAM.

Something small but fast had hit me. Careening way off course, I struggled to remain consciousness, only to find my navigation equipment had broken.

"Dude, you're way off course!"

"I know, Charles, I think some debris hit me."

"WHAT? How can you be so calm about that?!"

"Well, the emotional range I was created with is certainly less than y-"

"Okay, okay, I don't need you to spew useless facts every time I ask you something."

"No need to be rude. Interrupting someone else goes against the social no-"

"Just put your shields up, damn you."

I did just that as a careened through the atmosphere of Barren (apt name, if you ask me), my target planet. Except I wasn't on target. Sigh. The can would likely remain unkicked for today.


My name is Ambien Aerona. I was a pretty normal girl, that is until approximately 5 years ago. Now I'm a pretty extraordinary girl. So imagine my lack of surprise when a person comes hurtling from the sky right at me at hypersonic speeds.

"Oh."

...

"Oh, shi-"


Hello. I am the narrator of this story. Or at least I would be, were it not written in different people's points of view! Now I am jobless. So I sit here and observe. Expect me to make some snide commentary from time to time. That is all.