Opposites Attract
By: Jey4eva
Chapter 15: The Line Between Love and Hate
I roamed the halls the last week, carefully avoiding 'accidentally' bumping into Wilkins. He seemed to not really care; it seemed like he was doing his share of avoidance himself. Though there were those few time when I'd catch him staring at me. It was getting very annoying. I mean, what the hell do you do if 'leave me alone, bitch' doesn't work?
God...
And that bastard, how dare he enter my room. Him of all people should know that you don't enter a girl's room without her knowing! Especially when she's freakin' SLEEPING! And God, he almost read the diary entry I had typed up the night before... I knew I should've saved it! But its not like I expected HIM to come into my room early in the morning and get nosy. Asshole. He just doesn't know when to leave things alone.
I shook my head trying to shake away the pictures in my mind. It was like every single thing I have witnessed him doing was playing over and over in my head- in slow motion. It was sickening. How the hell had I gotten this way? Why the hell was he doing this to me?
*Stop acting so dumb* my subconscious said. *You know EXACTLY why you can't stop thinking about him*
Because he's so disgustingly annoying? I answered myself. I shook my head and groaned. Stop TALKING to yourself Burke, I told myself. I stared ahead at the computer where I had typed up the speech. John and I had decided that we'd choose who had to read it by playing 'rock-paper-scissors' on Graduation morning. I seriously hoped I didn't have to do it. I hated being up in back of a podium and reading a speech in front of so many people. It was like the whole senior class-, which was a total of 900, about 50 teachers, and their parents, relatives, friends... UGH.
I hit print, reading over the speech. After I was satisfied, I turned off the computer and got ready for bed. So many thoughts swam in my mind. Graduation tomorrow; wear comfortable shoes; decide what to use in the game; cheat if necessary; don't trip; look happy; John; don't stare; don't think; wait think, need to think.... I yawned, tired. Too many things to worry about. I needed sleep. I crawled into bed and did so with the same thoughts imprinted in my mind.
*
"Break a leg Kat!" Keith called as I came down the stairs in my graduation gown. "An arm, a finger... Something."
I glowered at him. "Don't forget to break your fall," I snapped back at him.
"Hah hah," Keith replied dryly.
"Stop it," Mom ordered. "You look beautiful Kat. Don't you think you should put your hair up?"
"I don't know HOW Mom," I replied impatiently.
"Okay, you look fine. Let's go. Dad's waiting in the car," she said, rushing everyone out.
I tripped on my heels. I had worn them again because of my Mom's insistence. I rolled my eyes as I straightened.
When we arrived at the school, I immediately looked around for John. I must've looked like a freak searching the crowds.
"Hey," a deep voice said behind me.
I whirled around. "Where have you been?" I demanded.
"Right behind you apparently," he said with laughter in his eyes and voice.
"Would you please be serious?" I exclaimed.
"Would you please chill out?" He replied. "This is our graduation. No need to be so uptight about it."
I gave an exasperated sigh. "C'mon let's get the stupid child game over with so we know who has to say the speech," I said.
"Alrighty," he replied. He put a hand behind his back, and I followed suit. "Ready?"
I nodded.
"Rock, paper, scissors, shoot!" We chanted softly, pulling out our hands from behind our back at the same time. We both stared down at the result. My hand was clenched up in a fist for rock. John's hand was open, meaning paper.
He wrapped his "paper" around my "rock". He smirked up at me.
I racked my brains thinking fast. "What?" I asked, playing dumb.
He smiled amused, "Paper covers rock. I win. You lose."
"Wha- What do you mean!" I asked desperately. "I never understood that!" I said bitterly. "Rocks are so much bigger than paper and can squish them. Paper covering up rocks... stupid," I muttered.
He grinned. "You lost- Don't be a sore loser."
"It just doesn't make sense!" I protested. "And it's not fair. I demand a rematch."
He shook his head chucking softly. "Burke you're nuts," he said.
I made a face, "Come oooon!" I whined.
He rolled his eyes handing me the speech back. "Have fun studying."
"But-" I started.
"Ah ah!" He said holding a finger to my lips. "Nope. You're going to do this." He laughed. "I never figured you for a sore loser."
"You're crazy!" I said shaking my head. In my head I was admitting defeat. I was definitely not getting out of this one. Damn.
"Don't worry, Burkey- I'll be up there with you to hold your hand if you want," he said teasingly.
"HAH!" I retorted.
He smiled secretly then walked away. I felt kind of disappointed that he didn't stay. He was just going to leave me like that? UGH. What the hell was I supposed to do now?
"You gave Logan the other copy, right?" I called to his retreating back.
He gave me the thumbs up without turning around.
I chewed the side of my cheek then looked around for my marked seat. I stared down at the speech reading it over and over again, making invisible marks of where to pause or look up. I closed my eyes and moaned silently. It wasn't fair. Why the hell had I chosen rock? I should've been smart enough to know that he would use paper. Ugh. When everyone was settled and Logan got up to make his speech, I ripped my speech up into confetti. No use studying now, I thought. I'd just wing it. The butterflies in my stomach seemed to multiply over and over again until finally Logan announced the valedictorians.
"I'd like to introduce you to our most hardworking students this year. They have kept a 4.0 grade point average since their freshmen year, and are being awarded with the title of 'class valedictorian'."
More of valedictorianS, I thought silently.
"Please ladies and gentlemen, give a big hand to Mr. John Wilkins and Miss Katrina Burke."
Why the hell did he say Wilkins before me? I thought. Asshole. I got up from my seat, having the slight urge to run away when I cast a glance at the crowd seated, clapping loudly. But I ignored it and strode proudly up the aisle with John only a foot behind me. We both walked up the steps, and I got behind the podium. The booklet had been flipped to the speech and I stared down at it, waiting for everyone to quiet down and get settled. I took a deep breath trying to get collected myself. I steadied myself by grabbing onto the podium.
Pretend they're all in the Playboy bunny costumes, I told myself. Pretend. Pretend pretend pretend.
Finally everyone had stopped clapping and was waiting for me to begin. I smiled faintly.
"Good morning students, parents, teachers, friends, family..." I said, almost surprised that I had found my voice. "Thank you for taking part in one of the biggest highlights in our life. Graduation- also known as the day where we're pretty much finished with everything, from mild tempered teachers to homework and essays... pep rallies and dances. It's a day where we can sit and reflect on the years that have gone by too fast. We can ruminate on the future- Decisions we'll have to make, choices we'll have..." I trailed off shaky breathed. I felt like I couldn't breathe. This speech seemed like it was going to go on forever... I wasn't even through the first paragraph...
I could already imagine John smirking to himself as he stood beside me. I tried pulling it together. Calm down calm down. Don't look at anyone; don't look at anyone.... BREATHE. It seemed like I was never going to continue. People were probably getting annoyed at me. Suddenly I felt someone take hold of my hand. It was John. He squeezed it gently, as if telling me I could do it.
...'Don't worry, Burkey- I'll be up there with you to hold your hand if you want.'...
I nodded to myself and continued on. "Graduation's a scary thing. But through the fear, we feel excited, nervous, emotional... Everyone says that high school is the best 4 years of your life. Though some people won't admit it- its true. Many people make good friends. The kind that will continue to be your friend through college and marriage- through any obstacle life throws at them. Its also the time where you can learn new things about yourself. What your life's mission is- what you plan to do with your life. High school is a crucial part of growing up," I said earnestly. I was fully aware that I hadn't shook Wilkins off. It just seemed like he was giving me the strength to keep going.
"I'll admit, I've had the days where I want to crawl up under the covers and stay there- but you can't do that. You have to face the world another day. Everyone has one of those days where it seems like the world is not on your side. You failed a test- Broke up with your boyfriend or girlfriend- maybe tripped in front of everyone, spilling ketchup all over your shirt. Things happen. You get over them, and so does everyone else... After a century or so." I paused as some people laughed quietly.
"And yes, even for the class valedictorian, school can be pretty tough. And when push comes to shove, you might've felt like just shutting down and forgetting all about school. Who needs it, right? Some of you may have made that decision, but those of you still sitting before me, it wasn't the case. You endured the Sats, midterms, finals, and still managed to keep a fashion statement as you walked through those halls-" People chuckled, and I smiled along with them. I almost forgot that Wilkins hand was still attached to mine. ALMOST. His hand was warm, against my cool one. I was wondering if he thought that this meant something more than him helping me out.
*Are YOU thinking it means something more?*
NO, I thought harshly to myself.
*Yeah sure*
"But now high school has come to an end. The Prom's over, classes have been let out, you're free- ALMOST. You just have to get through this stupid valedictorian speech..." I laughed along with everyone. "Through the memories of hours you spent studying, and the same amount you spent getting ready for a date- everyone here knows you will never forget your high school experience. And I'm really proud to say that we made it! We've made it through everything. And now we're onto bigger and better things." I grinned as I improvised the last sentence which was supposed to say 'good luck'.
"So everyone, break a leg, an arm, a finger- SOMETHING to your past and your future that awaits you."
I could hear Keith's loud guffaws through the cheers and whistles.
"Not bad Burke," John said as I turned to face him.
I tilted my head to the side, "You're right... I was good wasn't I?"
He laughed, "Also very modest."
I rolled my eyes and stepped back from the podium and descended down the steps with John at my side.
*
We had received our diplomas, and I was trying to find my parents. But with thousands of people scurrying around me, many giving me pats on the back or hugs out of nowhere- There was pretty much no way of me finding them. I groaned in frustration.
I weaved in and out of crowds and families, shrieking and crying girls. I finally gave up and sat down in a chair. I sat and scanned everyone's face, trying to find someone recognizable.
A shadow cast over me. "Finally, I never thought I'd catch up with you. You were walking like a mad woman!"
I looked up, shielding my face with my hand. "Oh," I said dully. "Its you."
John gave me a sardonic smile. "Y'know..." He said thoughtfully. "Every time I try talking to you, you always act like a bitch."
"You always act like an asshole!" I snapped back.
John sighed, shaking his head. "Katrina. Come on. Stop. It's our graduation. We don't need to get into a fight. You're always taking things the wrong way."
"Well maybe if you would stop TALKING to me, I wouldn't have anything to take offense in," I replied. I stood up. "And you're right. We shouldn't be fighting. In fact, let's not talk at all. Let's just say our goodbyes now like civil people."
"Alright. I'm up with that," John said nodding.
I nodded too.
We stood there silent.
"Well...?" I prodded.
"Well..." He echoed.
We stared at each other. He gazed intensely into my eyes, as if searching for an answer that I couldn't give him.
I cleared my throat, "Well then... Goodbye John," I said awkwardly. I held out my hand.
He stared down at it. "Right," he said slowly. "Bye Katrina." He took my hand and shook it leisurely. "It's been great... Debating with you."
I laughed, "More of WARRING with me," I said.
He smiled, "Yeah."
He still hadn't let go of my hand.
I licked my lips nervously. I back away, making him drop my hand. I clasped my hands together, "Uh well... I guess I'll see you around."
"Yeah. See you." He said nodding.
I nodded slowly with him, uncertain. Then I gained confidence and nodded firmly, "Yeah. Well bye." I didn't wait for his answer. I didn't want hear his answer. I smirked to myself. I always have to have the last word...
"Katrina!"
I groaned. What the hell did he want now? We just lost an hour of our lives saying goodbye, and now he still had to TALK to me? I decided to ignore him, willing him to leave me alone and kept walking.
"Katrina!"
I rolled my eyes. Leave me alone, leave me alone, leave me alone, I thought.
"Katrina! Goddamnit! Would you please stop!" He whirled me around.
"What?" I mumbled, looking down at the grass. "I'm through with you. We said goodbye. I don't want to talk anymore. Can we please stop talking now?"
"Katrina, look at me," he demanded.
I raised my eyes to his. "Yeah?"
"I love you Katrina. And you have got to stop denying yourself," he said forcefully.
"Denying myself?" I said, astounded. "Where the hell did you get that? DENYING MYSELF?! Denying myself of WHAT Wilkins?" I snapped. "What? LOVING you?" YOU?!" I asked incredulously. "Denying myself of loving YOU of all people?! Give me a BREAK! Like I would ever have an attraction- let alone any FEELINGS for YOU! You- A-a" I sputtered, thinking. Emotions were running wild in my head. I couldn't think straight. I couldn't see straight. What had I done to deserve this? "A SELFISH-" I poked his chest. "COCKY-" I poked him again. "ARROGANT-" Poke. "MALICIOUS ASS-" Poke. "Of-" POKE. "A-" POKE. "JOCK!"
I stopped, out of breath. "How the HELL could you THINK that I could love you?!" I shouted, tears springing to my eyes. "You- you're stupid... And- and MEAN.... And just... No. No no no no no no." I said shaking my head. I hit his chest weakly. "No." I couldn't breathe. I could barely stand; my knees were giving in. What the hell was happening to me? I felt like I was on the verge of hysterics.
"Katrina," he said gently. I could hear laughter in his voice. He caught my second fist then pulled me towards him, holding me in his arms.
"Goddamn you, you asshole. Thinking this is funny..." I mumbled, burying my face into his chest. It was so warm... It smelled so good. I just wanted to close my eyes and listen to his heartbeat.
Light laughter was his reply.
"I hate you," I continued. "I hate you with all my heart. I really do. I hate you." I repeated the line over again and again, trying to make sense of what I was saying. How had I gotten this way?
"I love you anyway," he said.
"I love you too..." Omigod. Had I just said that?! "I hate you," I muttered. "I hate you."
"Katrina... I think we need to have a LONG talk."
"We are talking," I mumbled into his chest. "And I'm tired. You see what you did to me? Asshole... I don't want to talk anymore. Let's stop talking. Please," I pleaded.
"Okay," he said agreeably, lifting my chin, to meet my eyes. "We don't have to talk," he said seriously, staring into my eyes.
"We don't?" I asked brightening.
"No," he said shaking his head, getting that smirk again.
I hit him with my fist. "I hate you, you son of a-"
He cut me off by pressing his lips to mine. I got lost in the kiss, cutting out the whole world- forgetting that not too long ago I had been looking for my family. That ship had sailed and gone... Along with my sanity.
"I hate you," I muttered in between a kiss.
He laughed, pressing me closer to him. "I can live with that," he whispered.
A/N: Ahhh... Love... Hate... It's all the same. Gosh, this chapter was FUN! Seriously it was... Omigod... You GUYS! It's over! It is... I really hope you all enjoyed it. I sure did. I'd like to thank everyone for reading this story, cause' you're the only reason I write.
I'd especially like to thank:
mmEsmerizEd, icy queen, Neophrite, Daydreamer, Violet_18, Girlfad, LeAnn, Lubentina, Naughty-Angel, Twisted Rose, chickie, lilmakochan Erinhead, Jess, Jen Drake, sapofbks2002, InSyPeRangel, THEwriter Lioness, crissy, eThErEaLAnGeL, qtpiez, Sonata, labels.DON'T.like.ME., shroom gurl, Corali, Vivi Laney, midnight dreamer, Kwyjibo, star123, Baby Dust Bunny, Shannon, ~*Sweet Dreamz*~, ~*issues_r_us024*~, grrrL, Harmonized, Naughty-Angel, Sonata of the Moonlit Hours, cass, Katie, Choco-Drops, Ice Queen, Angel of Drama, Dee, Magentha, Midnight Strike,Yamilee, Baybee, Melody, Social Thursdays, grl,Beccs, Eraserhead, flashditzie, Blazing-moon, Girlfad, SAngel, Angelgirlie805, chanty, Felix, lindsi, jamie, angel, sugarplumprincess, Alexiana, Kelly, qt3, Dark faerie, Riulyn, dnj, chloe, Kris, StaRsHiNe, its grrrrrreat, Safire, Lin, Fading Rose, Your Chica, me, Julie Marie, Ash, kira, Random Artemis, All-timate, PrincessLesse, JasmineFlower, Shady Haze, adrienne-denilmo, Lauren, Caroline, watercreature, solidchristian_88, Heather, Monica, Neya Trinidad, Winter paradise, lola, Meg, The Infamous Chibi Cat, AngelFireStar, Carina, Ellen, Jessica, Sabrina, rachel, Emilia, flower, Hunter Cormick, Selain, Krzi Kc, Amanda, RaliNeoBlade, Sugar, Melissa, 3245, Arcee, rqt3, Angela, Ashley, Bethany, mrs. michael moscovitz, Katherine, Mikagirl, Taiyl, Angie, KF, Sara, Jhondie, mulan, Alex, leah, gypsylady, Nicole, Samantha, xorcha, Hazel Rauselt, Maid of the Mystics, Ming, Amarria Rosetti, LaNnY, Musicgurlie, kuki, Gabriella, SweetEvil, hallokitty, goatsheepie, The Fool's World, Shaena, kierce, toby_penn, Viridiana, ruby, anonymous, faye, Nikki, tabasco sauce, kas, andiegels, audrey, Celestial Starz, Bobbie, Jolie, jk, Devine Gantelle
Thank you for all your reviews and support. If it weren't for you I wouldn't have continued this story. (okay, yeah I would but I'm assuming you aren't reading this anymore) Lol. Well, thank you again for all your reviews. I hope you review this chapter and tell me what you thought of the ending.
***Oh, I got some inspiration for that "break a leg, an arm, a finger... SOMETHING" from that movie "Model Behavior" y'know the one with the look-alikes and Justin Timberlake?
***And I got that inspiration thing for the part where John says that they don't have to talk and blah blah... Then he kisses Katrina. Yeah I got inspiration for that from the book "Darkest Hour". I'm sorry but I don't remember the author. It was from "The Mediator" series. Its a really good book if you ever find the book I'm talking about...
By: Jey4eva
Chapter 15: The Line Between Love and Hate
I roamed the halls the last week, carefully avoiding 'accidentally' bumping into Wilkins. He seemed to not really care; it seemed like he was doing his share of avoidance himself. Though there were those few time when I'd catch him staring at me. It was getting very annoying. I mean, what the hell do you do if 'leave me alone, bitch' doesn't work?
God...
And that bastard, how dare he enter my room. Him of all people should know that you don't enter a girl's room without her knowing! Especially when she's freakin' SLEEPING! And God, he almost read the diary entry I had typed up the night before... I knew I should've saved it! But its not like I expected HIM to come into my room early in the morning and get nosy. Asshole. He just doesn't know when to leave things alone.
I shook my head trying to shake away the pictures in my mind. It was like every single thing I have witnessed him doing was playing over and over in my head- in slow motion. It was sickening. How the hell had I gotten this way? Why the hell was he doing this to me?
*Stop acting so dumb* my subconscious said. *You know EXACTLY why you can't stop thinking about him*
Because he's so disgustingly annoying? I answered myself. I shook my head and groaned. Stop TALKING to yourself Burke, I told myself. I stared ahead at the computer where I had typed up the speech. John and I had decided that we'd choose who had to read it by playing 'rock-paper-scissors' on Graduation morning. I seriously hoped I didn't have to do it. I hated being up in back of a podium and reading a speech in front of so many people. It was like the whole senior class-, which was a total of 900, about 50 teachers, and their parents, relatives, friends... UGH.
I hit print, reading over the speech. After I was satisfied, I turned off the computer and got ready for bed. So many thoughts swam in my mind. Graduation tomorrow; wear comfortable shoes; decide what to use in the game; cheat if necessary; don't trip; look happy; John; don't stare; don't think; wait think, need to think.... I yawned, tired. Too many things to worry about. I needed sleep. I crawled into bed and did so with the same thoughts imprinted in my mind.
*
"Break a leg Kat!" Keith called as I came down the stairs in my graduation gown. "An arm, a finger... Something."
I glowered at him. "Don't forget to break your fall," I snapped back at him.
"Hah hah," Keith replied dryly.
"Stop it," Mom ordered. "You look beautiful Kat. Don't you think you should put your hair up?"
"I don't know HOW Mom," I replied impatiently.
"Okay, you look fine. Let's go. Dad's waiting in the car," she said, rushing everyone out.
I tripped on my heels. I had worn them again because of my Mom's insistence. I rolled my eyes as I straightened.
When we arrived at the school, I immediately looked around for John. I must've looked like a freak searching the crowds.
"Hey," a deep voice said behind me.
I whirled around. "Where have you been?" I demanded.
"Right behind you apparently," he said with laughter in his eyes and voice.
"Would you please be serious?" I exclaimed.
"Would you please chill out?" He replied. "This is our graduation. No need to be so uptight about it."
I gave an exasperated sigh. "C'mon let's get the stupid child game over with so we know who has to say the speech," I said.
"Alrighty," he replied. He put a hand behind his back, and I followed suit. "Ready?"
I nodded.
"Rock, paper, scissors, shoot!" We chanted softly, pulling out our hands from behind our back at the same time. We both stared down at the result. My hand was clenched up in a fist for rock. John's hand was open, meaning paper.
He wrapped his "paper" around my "rock". He smirked up at me.
I racked my brains thinking fast. "What?" I asked, playing dumb.
He smiled amused, "Paper covers rock. I win. You lose."
"Wha- What do you mean!" I asked desperately. "I never understood that!" I said bitterly. "Rocks are so much bigger than paper and can squish them. Paper covering up rocks... stupid," I muttered.
He grinned. "You lost- Don't be a sore loser."
"It just doesn't make sense!" I protested. "And it's not fair. I demand a rematch."
He shook his head chucking softly. "Burke you're nuts," he said.
I made a face, "Come oooon!" I whined.
He rolled his eyes handing me the speech back. "Have fun studying."
"But-" I started.
"Ah ah!" He said holding a finger to my lips. "Nope. You're going to do this." He laughed. "I never figured you for a sore loser."
"You're crazy!" I said shaking my head. In my head I was admitting defeat. I was definitely not getting out of this one. Damn.
"Don't worry, Burkey- I'll be up there with you to hold your hand if you want," he said teasingly.
"HAH!" I retorted.
He smiled secretly then walked away. I felt kind of disappointed that he didn't stay. He was just going to leave me like that? UGH. What the hell was I supposed to do now?
"You gave Logan the other copy, right?" I called to his retreating back.
He gave me the thumbs up without turning around.
I chewed the side of my cheek then looked around for my marked seat. I stared down at the speech reading it over and over again, making invisible marks of where to pause or look up. I closed my eyes and moaned silently. It wasn't fair. Why the hell had I chosen rock? I should've been smart enough to know that he would use paper. Ugh. When everyone was settled and Logan got up to make his speech, I ripped my speech up into confetti. No use studying now, I thought. I'd just wing it. The butterflies in my stomach seemed to multiply over and over again until finally Logan announced the valedictorians.
"I'd like to introduce you to our most hardworking students this year. They have kept a 4.0 grade point average since their freshmen year, and are being awarded with the title of 'class valedictorian'."
More of valedictorianS, I thought silently.
"Please ladies and gentlemen, give a big hand to Mr. John Wilkins and Miss Katrina Burke."
Why the hell did he say Wilkins before me? I thought. Asshole. I got up from my seat, having the slight urge to run away when I cast a glance at the crowd seated, clapping loudly. But I ignored it and strode proudly up the aisle with John only a foot behind me. We both walked up the steps, and I got behind the podium. The booklet had been flipped to the speech and I stared down at it, waiting for everyone to quiet down and get settled. I took a deep breath trying to get collected myself. I steadied myself by grabbing onto the podium.
Pretend they're all in the Playboy bunny costumes, I told myself. Pretend. Pretend pretend pretend.
Finally everyone had stopped clapping and was waiting for me to begin. I smiled faintly.
"Good morning students, parents, teachers, friends, family..." I said, almost surprised that I had found my voice. "Thank you for taking part in one of the biggest highlights in our life. Graduation- also known as the day where we're pretty much finished with everything, from mild tempered teachers to homework and essays... pep rallies and dances. It's a day where we can sit and reflect on the years that have gone by too fast. We can ruminate on the future- Decisions we'll have to make, choices we'll have..." I trailed off shaky breathed. I felt like I couldn't breathe. This speech seemed like it was going to go on forever... I wasn't even through the first paragraph...
I could already imagine John smirking to himself as he stood beside me. I tried pulling it together. Calm down calm down. Don't look at anyone; don't look at anyone.... BREATHE. It seemed like I was never going to continue. People were probably getting annoyed at me. Suddenly I felt someone take hold of my hand. It was John. He squeezed it gently, as if telling me I could do it.
...'Don't worry, Burkey- I'll be up there with you to hold your hand if you want.'...
I nodded to myself and continued on. "Graduation's a scary thing. But through the fear, we feel excited, nervous, emotional... Everyone says that high school is the best 4 years of your life. Though some people won't admit it- its true. Many people make good friends. The kind that will continue to be your friend through college and marriage- through any obstacle life throws at them. Its also the time where you can learn new things about yourself. What your life's mission is- what you plan to do with your life. High school is a crucial part of growing up," I said earnestly. I was fully aware that I hadn't shook Wilkins off. It just seemed like he was giving me the strength to keep going.
"I'll admit, I've had the days where I want to crawl up under the covers and stay there- but you can't do that. You have to face the world another day. Everyone has one of those days where it seems like the world is not on your side. You failed a test- Broke up with your boyfriend or girlfriend- maybe tripped in front of everyone, spilling ketchup all over your shirt. Things happen. You get over them, and so does everyone else... After a century or so." I paused as some people laughed quietly.
"And yes, even for the class valedictorian, school can be pretty tough. And when push comes to shove, you might've felt like just shutting down and forgetting all about school. Who needs it, right? Some of you may have made that decision, but those of you still sitting before me, it wasn't the case. You endured the Sats, midterms, finals, and still managed to keep a fashion statement as you walked through those halls-" People chuckled, and I smiled along with them. I almost forgot that Wilkins hand was still attached to mine. ALMOST. His hand was warm, against my cool one. I was wondering if he thought that this meant something more than him helping me out.
*Are YOU thinking it means something more?*
NO, I thought harshly to myself.
*Yeah sure*
"But now high school has come to an end. The Prom's over, classes have been let out, you're free- ALMOST. You just have to get through this stupid valedictorian speech..." I laughed along with everyone. "Through the memories of hours you spent studying, and the same amount you spent getting ready for a date- everyone here knows you will never forget your high school experience. And I'm really proud to say that we made it! We've made it through everything. And now we're onto bigger and better things." I grinned as I improvised the last sentence which was supposed to say 'good luck'.
"So everyone, break a leg, an arm, a finger- SOMETHING to your past and your future that awaits you."
I could hear Keith's loud guffaws through the cheers and whistles.
"Not bad Burke," John said as I turned to face him.
I tilted my head to the side, "You're right... I was good wasn't I?"
He laughed, "Also very modest."
I rolled my eyes and stepped back from the podium and descended down the steps with John at my side.
*
We had received our diplomas, and I was trying to find my parents. But with thousands of people scurrying around me, many giving me pats on the back or hugs out of nowhere- There was pretty much no way of me finding them. I groaned in frustration.
I weaved in and out of crowds and families, shrieking and crying girls. I finally gave up and sat down in a chair. I sat and scanned everyone's face, trying to find someone recognizable.
A shadow cast over me. "Finally, I never thought I'd catch up with you. You were walking like a mad woman!"
I looked up, shielding my face with my hand. "Oh," I said dully. "Its you."
John gave me a sardonic smile. "Y'know..." He said thoughtfully. "Every time I try talking to you, you always act like a bitch."
"You always act like an asshole!" I snapped back.
John sighed, shaking his head. "Katrina. Come on. Stop. It's our graduation. We don't need to get into a fight. You're always taking things the wrong way."
"Well maybe if you would stop TALKING to me, I wouldn't have anything to take offense in," I replied. I stood up. "And you're right. We shouldn't be fighting. In fact, let's not talk at all. Let's just say our goodbyes now like civil people."
"Alright. I'm up with that," John said nodding.
I nodded too.
We stood there silent.
"Well...?" I prodded.
"Well..." He echoed.
We stared at each other. He gazed intensely into my eyes, as if searching for an answer that I couldn't give him.
I cleared my throat, "Well then... Goodbye John," I said awkwardly. I held out my hand.
He stared down at it. "Right," he said slowly. "Bye Katrina." He took my hand and shook it leisurely. "It's been great... Debating with you."
I laughed, "More of WARRING with me," I said.
He smiled, "Yeah."
He still hadn't let go of my hand.
I licked my lips nervously. I back away, making him drop my hand. I clasped my hands together, "Uh well... I guess I'll see you around."
"Yeah. See you." He said nodding.
I nodded slowly with him, uncertain. Then I gained confidence and nodded firmly, "Yeah. Well bye." I didn't wait for his answer. I didn't want hear his answer. I smirked to myself. I always have to have the last word...
"Katrina!"
I groaned. What the hell did he want now? We just lost an hour of our lives saying goodbye, and now he still had to TALK to me? I decided to ignore him, willing him to leave me alone and kept walking.
"Katrina!"
I rolled my eyes. Leave me alone, leave me alone, leave me alone, I thought.
"Katrina! Goddamnit! Would you please stop!" He whirled me around.
"What?" I mumbled, looking down at the grass. "I'm through with you. We said goodbye. I don't want to talk anymore. Can we please stop talking now?"
"Katrina, look at me," he demanded.
I raised my eyes to his. "Yeah?"
"I love you Katrina. And you have got to stop denying yourself," he said forcefully.
"Denying myself?" I said, astounded. "Where the hell did you get that? DENYING MYSELF?! Denying myself of WHAT Wilkins?" I snapped. "What? LOVING you?" YOU?!" I asked incredulously. "Denying myself of loving YOU of all people?! Give me a BREAK! Like I would ever have an attraction- let alone any FEELINGS for YOU! You- A-a" I sputtered, thinking. Emotions were running wild in my head. I couldn't think straight. I couldn't see straight. What had I done to deserve this? "A SELFISH-" I poked his chest. "COCKY-" I poked him again. "ARROGANT-" Poke. "MALICIOUS ASS-" Poke. "Of-" POKE. "A-" POKE. "JOCK!"
I stopped, out of breath. "How the HELL could you THINK that I could love you?!" I shouted, tears springing to my eyes. "You- you're stupid... And- and MEAN.... And just... No. No no no no no no." I said shaking my head. I hit his chest weakly. "No." I couldn't breathe. I could barely stand; my knees were giving in. What the hell was happening to me? I felt like I was on the verge of hysterics.
"Katrina," he said gently. I could hear laughter in his voice. He caught my second fist then pulled me towards him, holding me in his arms.
"Goddamn you, you asshole. Thinking this is funny..." I mumbled, burying my face into his chest. It was so warm... It smelled so good. I just wanted to close my eyes and listen to his heartbeat.
Light laughter was his reply.
"I hate you," I continued. "I hate you with all my heart. I really do. I hate you." I repeated the line over again and again, trying to make sense of what I was saying. How had I gotten this way?
"I love you anyway," he said.
"I love you too..." Omigod. Had I just said that?! "I hate you," I muttered. "I hate you."
"Katrina... I think we need to have a LONG talk."
"We are talking," I mumbled into his chest. "And I'm tired. You see what you did to me? Asshole... I don't want to talk anymore. Let's stop talking. Please," I pleaded.
"Okay," he said agreeably, lifting my chin, to meet my eyes. "We don't have to talk," he said seriously, staring into my eyes.
"We don't?" I asked brightening.
"No," he said shaking his head, getting that smirk again.
I hit him with my fist. "I hate you, you son of a-"
He cut me off by pressing his lips to mine. I got lost in the kiss, cutting out the whole world- forgetting that not too long ago I had been looking for my family. That ship had sailed and gone... Along with my sanity.
"I hate you," I muttered in between a kiss.
He laughed, pressing me closer to him. "I can live with that," he whispered.
A/N: Ahhh... Love... Hate... It's all the same. Gosh, this chapter was FUN! Seriously it was... Omigod... You GUYS! It's over! It is... I really hope you all enjoyed it. I sure did. I'd like to thank everyone for reading this story, cause' you're the only reason I write.
I'd especially like to thank:
mmEsmerizEd, icy queen, Neophrite, Daydreamer, Violet_18, Girlfad, LeAnn, Lubentina, Naughty-Angel, Twisted Rose, chickie, lilmakochan Erinhead, Jess, Jen Drake, sapofbks2002, InSyPeRangel, THEwriter Lioness, crissy, eThErEaLAnGeL, qtpiez, Sonata, labels.DON'T.like.ME., shroom gurl, Corali, Vivi Laney, midnight dreamer, Kwyjibo, star123, Baby Dust Bunny, Shannon, ~*Sweet Dreamz*~, ~*issues_r_us024*~, grrrL, Harmonized, Naughty-Angel, Sonata of the Moonlit Hours, cass, Katie, Choco-Drops, Ice Queen, Angel of Drama, Dee, Magentha, Midnight Strike,Yamilee, Baybee, Melody, Social Thursdays, grl,Beccs, Eraserhead, flashditzie, Blazing-moon, Girlfad, SAngel, Angelgirlie805, chanty, Felix, lindsi, jamie, angel, sugarplumprincess, Alexiana, Kelly, qt3, Dark faerie, Riulyn, dnj, chloe, Kris, StaRsHiNe, its grrrrrreat, Safire, Lin, Fading Rose, Your Chica, me, Julie Marie, Ash, kira, Random Artemis, All-timate, PrincessLesse, JasmineFlower, Shady Haze, adrienne-denilmo, Lauren, Caroline, watercreature, solidchristian_88, Heather, Monica, Neya Trinidad, Winter paradise, lola, Meg, The Infamous Chibi Cat, AngelFireStar, Carina, Ellen, Jessica, Sabrina, rachel, Emilia, flower, Hunter Cormick, Selain, Krzi Kc, Amanda, RaliNeoBlade, Sugar, Melissa, 3245, Arcee, rqt3, Angela, Ashley, Bethany, mrs. michael moscovitz, Katherine, Mikagirl, Taiyl, Angie, KF, Sara, Jhondie, mulan, Alex, leah, gypsylady, Nicole, Samantha, xorcha, Hazel Rauselt, Maid of the Mystics, Ming, Amarria Rosetti, LaNnY, Musicgurlie, kuki, Gabriella, SweetEvil, hallokitty, goatsheepie, The Fool's World, Shaena, kierce, toby_penn, Viridiana, ruby, anonymous, faye, Nikki, tabasco sauce, kas, andiegels, audrey, Celestial Starz, Bobbie, Jolie, jk, Devine Gantelle
Thank you for all your reviews and support. If it weren't for you I wouldn't have continued this story. (okay, yeah I would but I'm assuming you aren't reading this anymore) Lol. Well, thank you again for all your reviews. I hope you review this chapter and tell me what you thought of the ending.
***Oh, I got some inspiration for that "break a leg, an arm, a finger... SOMETHING" from that movie "Model Behavior" y'know the one with the look-alikes and Justin Timberlake?
***And I got that inspiration thing for the part where John says that they don't have to talk and blah blah... Then he kisses Katrina. Yeah I got inspiration for that from the book "Darkest Hour". I'm sorry but I don't remember the author. It was from "The Mediator" series. Its a really good book if you ever find the book I'm talking about...