Hi everyone, so it has been a very long and hectic few years since I have written anything. I have had so many good and bad experiences that have put me in such a slump. Fiction has always been such a great escape for me, but, I changed and created new escapes from reality that was still in the real life. Constantly working and keeping busy, not giving myself time to relax and reflect.
Now, I am back and finding more time to write once more. This is a bit hard for me to write, as my experiences have made me lose sight of the good old romance of writing. So I found that incorporating it with something else I can relate to, I was able to come up with this.
So please be gentle with my new writing style, and let me know what you think This is just a condensed version of a story I am working on.
Long Gone To Move On
It feels like it was just yesterday. The day Marcus met the love of his life, Katrina Hartley. Marcus remembers the important parts of that day mostly. Important things like the weather, how grey and dreary it was and how cold I was, considering his roommate locked him out of the dorm room before he could hurry back to my room to grab his jacket when he realised how freezing the weather was.
That piece of information sticks out to Marcus the most, because it takes him to the next point, Katrina. She made the grey vanish when she came into his line of sight. The day got brighter and Marcus suddenly felt warm at the mere sight of her. She was absolute perfection in the simplest way that is the best way Marcus could describe it to himself. She was simple, hardly wore make up and wore the most basic clothes, plain Tee shirts and ripped jeans. I guess I could just say she was simply perfect to him. Still is. Always will be.
Katrina heaved a heavy sigh as she stared in the mirror. She stood as tall as she could as she checked herself over, making sure she looked perfect for the big day. She smoothed her gown as best she could while her bridesmaids hurried around the room, doing their own hair and getting their makeup done.
Marcus wandered the halls of the venue aimlessly; hands were sweating and his head spinning. Nerves have never hit him so hard for this day. Sometimes, he wondered if he did the right thing staying with Katrina as long as he had. He stopped outside the bridal party's room and stood there. Staring at the door as if he was willing it to open. But it didn't move. He couldn't move. He could hardly breathe.
Katrina opened the door to her dorm room to see Marcus standing there for their date. One year later and they were in their second year of college together and things were perfect. First loves always seem to be that way, don't they? We can never see any fault in our first love. They can do no wrong to us ever.
But for these two to last as long as they have and still see that perfection in one another, it seemed like it was always going to be this perfect.
"Ready to go?" Marcus asked as he grabbed Katrina's hand, "I got us a table at your favourite place"
Katrina couldn't help but smile at that sentence. Her favourite place was actually just their place. Amice's Italian Restaurant. Katrina was a big pizza lover.
"I always am" she smiled as she walked out to the car with Marcus.
For Katrina and Marcus, silence was never uncomfortable. Just the warmth and the fact that they were side by side was enough for them. It was the most secure thing for the both of them.
Katrina shook her head from the memories.
"Huh?" she mused, turning her head to her Maid of Honour "Sorry, did I miss something?"
"Uh, yeah... Time for you to get your make up done"
"Right... Sure thing" she nodded quickly as she made her way to the makeup artist's chair.
Marcus stopped himself from going into the room. It was bad luck to see the bride before getting married. It was bad luck. And Marcus needed the bride to be happy. Happy life equals happy life right?
Maybe a peek wouldn't hurt.
He opened the door slightly and peered in at Katrina sitting in the makeup artist's chair, her head tilted back with her eyes closed, ready to have her makeup done. She looked so serene and relaxed at that moment, and yet, still had trouble and worry written across her face.
Katrina lay across Marcus' lap on the couch, her head tilted back over the arm rest. It was absolute bliss to be like that with Marcus. Nothing was more comfortable to Katrina than him. They were in their final year of college and moved off campus to live together in their own apartment and have spent a good 4 years together. It was serious between the two, but perfect.
"Katrina?" Marcus asked quietly
"Yeah, Marcus?" Katrina stayed as she was, relaxed and half asleep.
"Are you happy?" Marcus started brushing his fingers through Katrina's hair to cover his nerves.
This piqued Katrina's curiosity and nerves. That was such a random question for her.
Was she happy?
There was a long silence between the two as the gears turned in her head, mulling over it. Her happiness that is.
"Well..." Katrina started as she sat up and wrapped her arms around Marcus' neck into a hug "I am living with you... A guy I fell in love with at first sight, even when I didn't believe in that sort of thing. I had always been careful with my heart and you know that..."
It was true, Katrina had been hurt in the past, but not the same way Marcus could. The other guys didn't fully have Katrina's heart the way Marcus does.
Marcus simply nodded, staying quiet as Katrina went on.
"And we are in a good place. Not the house, but our situation... Both going to the same college and studying degrees that will benefit us in the future" Katrina saw Marcus break into a smile
"OUR future, huh? Thinking that far ahead now?"
"Yeah..." Katrina started to grin "I know that we will have this whole grown up thing down-pat before we get too grownup"
"Like, a proper house together with the 9-5 careers?"
"Will our groceries start to include house cleaning products for the apartment? No unhealthy snack foods—"
"Whoa whoa whoa! Yes we will be buying cleaning stuff and other grown up type products... But we still need those unhealthy snacks" Katrina laughed.
Marcus smiled as he tipped Katrina back and kissed her.
"I love you" he mumbled against her lips into the kiss.
"Back at ya" Katrina smiled as she kissed him in return.
Katrina opened her eyes and stared up at the ceiling.
"All done" the makeup artist announced as she pulled the makeup bib off of Katrina.
"Thank you" Katrina sighed as she stood and straightened herself out and sat back on the bed of the hotel room bed.
"Hey" Laine came and sat beside Katrina "Everything OK?"
"Yeah, of course... I just" Katrina sighed "I don't know if I can do this..."
Laine felt her lip tug downward at Katrina's words.
"Hey... You can" She wrapped an arm gently around Katrina and pulled her in gently "You have to. You two have come this far... You deserve to be happy"
Katrina felt the same old lump in her throat. It stung like hell and she did everything she could to suppress it all. It was always hard to suppress it all after everything.
"I know... But..." Katrina's voice broke, "What if I am not happy and I end up back where I started? Cold and untrusting... Unforgiving like I used to be?"
"You won't" Laine quickly interjected before Katrina broke entirely, "When you met him... I saw it, all walls came down. You were happy for the first time in a long time..."
Marcus stayed at the door listening...
"So" Laine began "Who is this Marcus and what has he done to my Katrina?"
Katrina blushed as she looked down at her bottle. It has been a while since they have seen each other due to their colleges being on opposite ends of the country.
"Well..." Katrina croaked out nervously "He is... Nice."
"Nice?" Laine echoed "That's it? Nice? Come on, spill some more!"
"OK, uh... he is sweet..." Katrina's expression glazed more and more at each word of Marcus "he is so caring... And he listens and observes. He is just so smart, you know? He absorbs everything, but at the same time, he is a bit of a dork, which just makes him even more attractive. He is strong and sweet... And adorable... And so handsome... He is the complete package"
Lain breathed out a quiet laugh.
"Shit, you have it bad for this one... More so than the others"
Katrina groaned and dropped her head onto the bar and heaved a sigh.
"What happens if it doesn't work?"
"I don't see how it couldn't" Laine shrugged "take your time. See how it goes"
"And that is why; I don't see you going back to the 'old Katrina'. Marcus broke those walls down and swept away the rubble"
Marcus smiled slightly at the thought of their discussion. Katrina was always the romantic type despite her bruised heart; it is what he loved about her. She never let bad things make her a bad person. Funnily enough, he thought so highly of her too... He never thought of what they had every vanishing.
Looking up at the clock, Marcus could see that it was nearly time. They had to wrap things up soon so that he and Katrina could get to where they needed to be.
"Well... Just think about it... Maybe have some time to yourself before meeting us at the chapel. OK?"
Katrina nodded and smiled as she hugged her best friend.
As the Bridal party left the hotel room for their cars, Marcus stepped out from the shadows and watched Katrina as she got up and gave herself one final look in the mirror.
His heart broke at the sight of her. Katrina stood, staring at her reflection, tears starting to fall so painfully down her face. Holding it together is never easy, especially with the guilt on a beautiful day. It won't be fair on her groom.
Marcus stepped up behind Katrina and gently placed his hands on her shoulders. He looks at the reflection, only to see Katrina standing alone there. He closes his eyes, wishing he could properly hold her one last time.
"Oh Marcus... I have no idea if this is some twisted nightmare I can't wake up from... Or if this will now be my reality" Katrina sobbed "I need you to be here. It isn't fair on anyone to feel this way, but... I can't do this without you"
Marcus closed his eyes and embraced her as best he could. So many long years he stayed by her side before and after the accident.
"I wish... I wish you were here..." Katrina sniffled "I know you are... I can always feel you around and... I feel so guilty knowing you're there and I know... I know I have to be happy for my sake."
"You have to be happy because you deserve to be" he said in a low voice "I want you happy. I am so sorry I held on as long as I have. But I had to make sure you are happy" Marcus shut his eyes more tightly, failing at holding back his tears "And now, I know you will be. You will be OK."
Katrina wrapped her arms around herself, nearly feeling the warmth of Marcus' presence.
"We have to let go sooner or later" Katrina said to herself, or rather, to Marcus.
Marcus smiled sadly as he let go gently and slowly, trying to keep hold as long as he can.
Katrina opened her eyes and turned around; she looked around the room and felt a warmth pass through her as the door opened to reveal her father.
"Ready to go, sweetheart?" Her father smiled "Your groom is waiting"
"Yeah" Katrina smiled and sniffled back her tears "I'm ready to go"