Getting Clean

Long time no talk. How have you been?
the words you said to me
It's been so long since we have spoken
I thought you would finally leave me be

A part of me wanted
to delete the words you wrote
but another part of me didn't
my heart beat in my throat

And all the feelings came rushing back
like a wave upon the shore
my phone held in a shaking hand
hoping you might write more

For one small second in time
I thought of writing back
With no regard to what could happen
or what happened in the past

For that moment all I wanted
was you for all of time
loving you forever more
always calling you mine

But then reality set in slowly
and mind won over heart
you are no good for me
we've known this from the start

Swipe my thumb to the left
the delete button shows
tears blind my vision
and run down my cheek and nose

I know this is for the best
I know my decision is right
but still I hesitate
my fist beside me clenching tight

I know I have to do this
to rid myself of you
to keep your poison out of me
to keep my blood running true

You were always like my drug
unhealthy for my soul
mind and body overtaken
on me, you've taken your toll

With my mind made up
I delete the words you wrote
I won't be like Rose from Titanic
I'll be staying on the boat

If this hurts you, I'm sorry
but it's what's best for me
for once I am thinking clearly
and from you, I am finally clean