Holding a blouse I heard the door swing open.

"School is way too hard." My roommate, Nadine walked in as she dumped her bag against the wall. Her hair lay perfectly flat against her shoulders and her make-up looked flawless besides the hot humid weather outside. I couldn't be outside for a few seconds without my make-up flooding down my face. I didn't know how she did it.

"What got you this time?" I asked as I caught a glance of Nadine and I on the full-size mirror behind her.

My hair fell against my tank top and my pale skin.

Nadine looked at a smaller mirror and fixed her white top and bent over to wipe a smudge of eyeliner from under her eyes.

I stared at the way her jeans complemented her figure. Part of me always hated how pretty she was. "I got a C on my chemistry exam." She pouted into the mirror.

I grabbed a hanger and hung the blouse in the wardrobe. "At least you passed." I walked over to the bed and sat down.

Nadine continued to stare into the mirror. "That's true." She finally turned to me and sighed with a slightly worried expression. "Evan wants to go out tonight, what should I wear?"

I shrugged. "Have you worn the red dress yet?"

The red dress was something Nadine bought unexpectedly one day that we decided to go out. It was sitting there on the window to a shop worth over 1000 dollars, but that didn't matter to Nadine. She bought it on a whim and stuffed it in our closet.

Her eyes widened and she ran to the closet. "OMG, yes." She picked out that perfect red dress that hugged her figure. She ran excitedly to the full-sized mirror and handed me the dress. "Hold this for me really quick."

I nodded and held the soft red dress in my hands that I would never be able to afford.

Nadine took off her tank top and I couldn't help but feel the same jealousy of her body I always felt. She had nice round breasts. I subtly looked down at mine. I felt like my boobs made me look disproportionate.

Nadine could wear anything and look cute and dainty. I always felt like I looked fat.

"Omg, ew. My arms are so flabby." Nadine stared at her perfectly fine arms and scrunched her face.

I rolled my eyes. "You're crazy."

"So how are things with Jayden?" She lifted her foot out of the pant leg. Her black underwear made her look like a Calvin Klein underwear model. I hated her so much.

I fidgeted with the red dress in my hands. "He still hasn't called me." To be honest, I was heartbroken. Jayden had been my crush for a long time now. I wanted to cry, but I swore I wouldn't. I only shrugged at Nadine who was pinching her belly skin. "I don't care anymore."

Nadine clicked her tongue and sat next to me on the bed. I held the red dress. "You know, I have no idea why you're still caught up on him, you can have, like, any guy you want."

I only shrugged and fought back some tears.

Nadine grabbed her phone and threw herself back. One of her legs was stretched out and the other with her knee bent. I noticed her hip bones slightly stuck out. She scrolled through her phone. "Well, you should forget that weirdo and date Charlie." She looked at me from behind her phone. "Charlie is super cute and he's totally in love with you."

I twisted myself to the side to look back at her. "That's not true." I knew it was true. Charlie always tried to play it cool because he knew I was in love with Jayden, but I knew he liked me.

"You definitely need to get over him."

I sighed. I wanted to hate Jayden. I really did. I felt anger welling up inside me while Nadine giggled at her phone.

"If you really want Jayden to come to his senses, try to make him jealous with someone else, maybe Charlie?" Nadine suggested from her pose on the bed.

No. It needed to be something that would really hit. I turned to Nadine. Her smooth legs dangling in front of me. She really made me hate myself.

I heard Nadine giggle as she scrolled though her phone.

Her phone began to ring and I kept still. She signed painfully and answered the phone.

"Hello."

There was a chatter from the phone.

"Yeah, give me five minutes, I'll be right out."

She hung up and looked at me. "I have to go, Evan is waiting for me outside."

She grabbed the dress from me and slipped it on. With a few touch ups in the mirror, she was ready.

She grabbed her bag from the bed. "I'll be back later." She smiled and walked out the door closing it behind her.

I sat there confused only thinking about Jayden. I felt helpless as I walked over to the mirror to look at myself. My face was flushed and my hair was a mess. My green eyes searched for an emotion on my face, but there wasn't any. I reached for a towel and made my way to the bathroom.

I wrapped my hair in a towel while I heard my phone ring. I ran and picked it up to see it was Jayden. I stared at the phone until it stopped ringing. I exhaled and shortly after I got a message.

"Open up. I'm outside."

My heart started to beat fast as I scrambled to put on my robe. Even though part of me hated Jayden, I still couldn't help but want him to like me.

I heard a knock on the door and I ran to the bathroom. I quickly rubbed some make up all over my face and dabbed a bit of red lipstick enough to stain my lips. I cleared my throat and quickly opened the door to reveal a tall guy. His perfectly groomed, brown hair framed his face perfectly. I longed to run my hands through it. His tan skin had a certain glow to him. He was so pretty, it hurt.

"What's up, kid?" He smiled his usual smile and I fought not to melt. His smile was perfect. Every time I saw him, it reminded me of why I couldn't get over him.

"Hey." I felt myself blush. Jayden looked down at my robe and chuckled.

"Caught ya at a bad time, didn't I?" He let himself in and pulled me closer. I felt my heart flutter. He stared down at me and kissed my forehead. "You always look so pretty." He let me go and walked to my room. "Where's Nadine?" He looked around the apartment before plopping down on the bed.

"She's out with Evan." I said quietly. I still wanted him to know I was upset.

"Figures." Jayden propped his chin up with his elbows. "Nadine never quits."

I walked into the room from the threshold. "Are you here for any reason in particular?" I grabbed some moisturizer from the vanity as I asked. I knew Jayden and he never did anything if he didn't have a reason. He threw himself back on my bed and stared at me.

"I came to see you."

I stopped, turned to him, and crossed my arms. "Oh, yeah?"

He frowned slightly and sat up. "Look Joyce, I know you're mad at me. I'm not stupid."

I turned my back on him and looked through my closet. I wasn't looking for anything in particular, I just didn't want to look at him.

He stood up and sighed. "I know you want answers, but you know I'm still deciding what to do." He continued.

I didn't look at him. It had been enough time. "You take me out to eat and you buy me flowers, you tell me you care about me and that you don't know where you would be without me, yet you don't want to call me your girlfriend." I sighed with annoyance. "And you don't want me to feel used…" My voice almost cracked.

I heard Jayden step closer. "Joyce, I thought you just wanted to be friends. You're so unclear sometimes."

I stayed quiet and stopped looking through my clothes. I had been as clear as glass with him.

I felt Jayden's arms wrap around my waist from behind. He rested his chin on my shoulder. "I love you, Joyce." He kissed my cheek and I felt my heart skip a beat. "Just give me some time."

Either way, everything felt wrong. Him like this with me, had been only in my thoughts. Now that it was actually happening, I sort of wanted it to stop.

His lips brushed my ear and I whimpered quietly.

He kissed my lips. He kissed my lips. I kissed him back. I began to feel sick to my stomach. I was surprised that I felt nothing anymore. Not sparks, not fireworks, nothing. I turned and wrapped my arms around his neck. I still wanted to want him, but I couldn't. I pulled looked away.

Jayden stopped and looked down at me. "What's wrong?"

I pulled away from him.

He looked confused.

I walked to the living room. He followed. "Joyce? Are you going to talk to me?"

"Please, leave." I opened the door and stood there waiting for him to get out.

I looked away because I knew if I looked at him, he would bewitch me again.

"Joyce…"

I continued to stare out the window.

I heard him sigh and he walked out. "See you in Calc."

I nodded and closed the door as he turned his back. I immediately felt the tears flow out of my eyes. If he truly wanted me he would have done something different, but he didn't. He never wanted me seriously. Deep inside, I knew it all along.

"That asshole is just a spoiled brat." Nadine had taken a seat next to me on out living room couch. She was still in her skin tight red dress.

I hugged my knees and stared at the TV. "I don't know what you're talking about."

Nadine sighed. "Come on. When you get like this the reason is always Jayden."

"How was your date with Evan? You're back soon." I reached for the remote and began flipping through the channels.

Nadine rolled her eyes at my change of conversation topics, but she followed along. "We decided to take a time off." She twisted her hair on her finger and sighed.

"Why?" I turned to her, a bit more interested in the conversation.

She shrugged. "I just got bored."

I scoffed and she smiled getting up and walking towards the kitchen.

"Nadine!" I followed her. Only Nadine had the option to be 'bored' with guys.

She giggled as she pulled out the bread from the cabinet. "What? I want something new."

I shook my head at her. "You're terrible."

She shrugged and spread some mayonnaise on her bread.

I sat on a stool at the island and stared at Nadine. I wondered what it would be like to be as beautiful as Nadine.

Suddenly, Nadine drooped her butterknife and turned to me with wide eyes and a smile.

"What?" I asked suspiciously.

"Let's go out tonight! I'll call Cassie!" She walked over to me cheerfully and shook my shoulders.

I sighed and looked down at my sweats. "I'm not exactly party ready, Nadine."

"Oh, come on, I'll get you ready!" She giggled and pulled me over to out room.

Cassie arrived in a motorcycle while we were waiting outside.

Nadine flipped her hair back in annoyance. "Why is Cassie always late for everything…?" She had changed in to a smaller and somehow tighter black dress.

Cassie giggled flirtatiously at the guy in the motorcycle as he parked and walked up to us. He took his helmet off.

Cassie's curly red hair was currently flattened out completely. I could tell she had probably taken forever to do it. She must have loved this guy because she usually never spent that much time on herself.

"Hi guys!"

The guy fixed his hair and I recognized him as a guy in our Calculus class.

"Hi, girls. Long time no see." He smiled and I saw Cassie practically melt at his side.

"Hi, Ryan." Nadine smiled her usual prefect smile. "Why're you guys so late?"

Cassie giggled and turned to us. "We just took a few loops around the downtown." She leaned in and whispered excitedly. "It's so pretty!"

"Sorry, girls. I gotta run." Ryan smiled sweetly at Cassie and leaned over and kissed her on the cheek. "I'll call you later."

"Bye!" Nadine, Cassie, and I spouted simultaneously.

We watched as Ryan drove away on his motorcycle.

Cassie hopped up and down excitedly. I couldn't help but feel a twinge of envy.

Nadine drove with me in the passenger seat. Cassie chattered on in the back.

"…And I think it's almost official!"

Nadine scoffed as she arrived at a red light. "So he hasn't made it official yet?"

Cassie giggled. "No, but he will. We like each other a lot."

Cassie had always been a girl who fell in love easily. She was worse than me. I couldn't help but feel bad. I was scared she would get hurt. Cassie was the youngest and smallest of us. Nadine and I had always been protective over her.

"Just be careful, Cass." Nadine made a right turn on to the expressway. The downtown skyscrapers came into view and i couldn't help but smile as I looked out the window. It was all so beautiful. I never got tired of looking up at the city lights.

Nadine and Cass chattered on. I had tuned out until I heard Nadine call my name.

"Joyce!"

I turned to Nadine as she snapped her fingers at me. "Yeah?"

"I called Charlie and he's bringing some friends." She smirked as came to a stop at a parking lot of a club. KAZ, it was Nadine's favorite because of the tiny fruit appetizers.

I almost screamed. "Nadine!"

She giggled. "You need to get over Jayden!"

Cassie pitched in from the back. "Yeah, he's a jerk, Joyce."

I crossed my arms in front of me. "So is Charlie."

Nadine sighed exasperatedly. "He's only a jerk because he likes you." She pulled out a tiny mirror and fixed her already perfect make-up. "That's the way he wants to get your attention."

I stayed quiet until Nadine clapped her hands in excitement and stepped out of the car. "Let's go!"

We sat in a booth as Nadine stuffed her face with the tiny snacks and Cassie was sucked into her phone.

I froze when I saw Charlie walk into the club with Jayden.

I rolled my eyes at Nadine's wide ones.

Ignore him. She mouthed.

I looked around the dancing people and acted like I hadn't seen them.

She stood up and smiled at Charlie. "Hi guys!"

Charlie smiled with teeth and slid into the booth next to Cassie and Nadine. but not really ever talked to. Charlie was a wannabe bad-boy type, at least that's what I noticed. He was tall, tan, and athletic. A bit generic if you asked me.

Jayden slid right next to me. He placed his arm over my shoulder and I noticed Nadine throw an unapproving glance.

"So where's Evan tonight?" Charlie looked at Nadine.

Nadine rolled her eyes. "I don't know, I'm not his mom."

Charlie spoke most of the night to Nadine and Cassie. Which left me with Jayden. He said nothing, but he stared at me with his honey eyes.

I felt awkward as I tried to act unfazed. I began to fake search through my bag.

Then he spoke. "Let's dance."

My head snapped to his and he didn't give me a chance to say no. He grabbed my hand and pulled me towards the dance floor. I threw a look at Nadine who only gave me another glare.

What Jayden and I did wasn't really called dancing. He held my waist and swayed in silence as he looked at me. I looked over his shoulder at nothing. I couldn't have felt more awkward.

"You're beautiful." He grabbed a strand of my hair and I felt warm inside.

Don't fall again...

"Thanks." I answered flatly.

Jayden began to lean in close to my face when Nadine walked quickly up to us and spoke over the music. I had never been so happy and angry at the same time at her for interrupting something.

"Sorry, Jayden! I have to take Joyce for a bit!"

Jayden nodded and let me go.

Nadine smiled and pulled me away and toward the bathroom.

"Thank you, Nadine." I sighed in relief and she stayed silent until we entered the bathroom.

She let me go and turned to me. "He has a girlfriend." Her expression was serious.

I felt my whole body go cold. "What..?"

Nadine sighed and crossed her arms. "That's why he never asked you out."

"How do you know?" I asked quietly trying not at act like I cared. I looked down at the ground,

Nadine took a deep breath. "Her name is Kaye Pierce and she lives in Columbia Ridge." She pulled out her cellphone and handed it to me. I trembled a bit as I looked at what was on it.

A picture of Jayden with a pretty blonde girl.

"Charlie told me." She frowned.

I fought back tears. I felt… hurt. "I don't care." I shrugged and handed Nadine her phone back.

She didn't buy it.

"He's an asshole and I'm telling his girlfriend." Nadine had a smug look on her face.

I didn't say anything because I was afraid I would cry.

Nadine's voice grew softer. "No one hurts you like that and gets away with it."

She reached for my hand and led me over back to the table where Cass, Charlie, and Jayden were.

"Hey, Charlie." Nadine smiled with me next to her and Charlie turned.

"Yeah?" His curly hair made him look a lot younger than he was.

"Joyce doesn't feel good, can you take her home?" Nadine used her most convincing voice. I knew what she was up to.

I saw Jayden shoot Nadine one of his cryptic glares. The one's I knew to well. If you didn't know him, he could have looked perfectly fine, but it was that slight change in the mood of his eyes that made him look somewhat dark.

Charlie looked at me and smirked. "Of course."