Wait, they told us,

it will be worth it

Wait, they said,

or you will regret it

They warned us of the despair

we could expect

The damage we could do

The physical tear that would never heal

Was I the only one who didn't listen?

Was I the only one who heard

the call of Eve

the first rebellion

the original sin

the ingrained defiance that sings in our veins

sweet as a Siren's song

We nod along,

solemn

But their cautionary tales fall

on deaf ears

History repeats itself

We do not really learn

from the mistakes of others

We have to find out for ourselves

And so I tore myself into

small pieces

and tossed them like bread to the birds

And now there are little bits of me

everywhere

that will never be returned to me

and I am less and less

Heart divided into fractions

Soul like a tapestry of tangled threads

loosening

unraveling

until what is left?

An intricate disaster

A code without a key

A hotel of memories

with no vacancy