Chapter 5: Bittersweet

Maxwell did not see her the rest of the day. He tried to see her when he got back from school but his knocks upon her door went unanswered. She had in every sense locked herself away from the rest of the world, even from him, even from the first real friend that she had ever known. He felt so helpless standing there, on the outside of the prison that she had given herself. He thought that she was letting him in little by little over the short month that he had known her. She had not taken down any wall, and he had not found a door that would allow him access to who she truly was. He was lost as to what he could do or even why she had acted in such a way to begin with.

The next morning she wasn't at school, he thought about her all through the day as he carried on his usual tasks with the same efficiency as he always had, but those deep blue eyes plagued his thoughts with every waking moment of the day. His work seemed to be more of a hassle to him than it was before, and Annibelle's attempts to woo him just made his blood boil with anger. By the time that the final bell rang he was more than ready to get out of the school and away from his fellow council members. He was stopped however, by a red faced Annibelle who seemed to be on a mission that she would not be stopped on.

"Annibelle, I am in a hurry." He began as he looked past her towards the door.

"Maxwell I have to speak to you, it is urgent and I believe that it is important information that you should observe in order to procure the ideal future for one such as yourself." She was using her airy tone combined with her intellectual phrases, something that he had been drawn to when he had personally asked her to join the Student Council at the beginning of their freshman year. Now that he had met and become what he hoped was close to Rosa, no she prefers Sora he chided himself, Annibelles ways were erring on the side of annoying.

"I am sure that whatever information you may have will be best heard at the start of school tomorrow." He stated with a sigh as he rubbed the bridge of his nose between his thumb and forefinger.

"It is about that miscreant that you have associated yourself with as of late." She straightened her shoulders as she spoke, clearly not willing to back down this early on in their conversation.

"Rosa is not a miscreant." He sighed once again as he lowered his hand to glare at her while he spoke, "She is very intelligent and she happens to be the one I am tutoring through Chemistry and Algebra two."

"She is a known delequent, I have taken the liberty to draw up her permanent record and-"

"Stop there Annibelle." He nearly shouted his demand as his fists clenched at his sides, "If you say another word I will have you thrown off this council. You are becoming obsessed and single minded and over what, another girl who has done nothing to provoke you. That is called bullying and our school has a no tolerance policy against bullying thus if you continue down the path you are currently on I as the Student Council President will have to personally see to your punishment and possible expulsion. "she frowned and gave a snort of disbelief at his words.

"You are seriously throwing out your rank over a simpleton that you are just tutoring her?" she sneered as she crossed her arms. He raised his chin proudly as he looked at her down the bridge of his nose as if she was the true simpleton in this conversation.

"My personal life," he stated firmly, "Is none of your business." She looked at him with a mixture of shock and disgust on her face as he forced his way past her and out of the door. He did not look back to see if she had followed him as he made his way out of the school and towards his bike. He slipped onto the seat after unlocking his bike from the rack and adjusted his messenger bag before kicking off and riding off towards his road.

She answered the door almost immediately after the first set of knocks that he rapped against her front door. Her eyes were sunken in and had dark bags under them; he almost was too shocked by the sight to notice that they were bloodshot as well. She only looked at him briefly before stepping out of his way and allowing him to take a few cautious steps into the darkness that lay beyond her front door. Even her large flat screen t.v. was turned off causing the room to seem abandoned and ghastly, like a tomb would be for the ones who inhabited it if they were still conscious.

"You weren't at school today." He said as he turned to look at her. She was still standing there holding the door open with her head bent slightly forward and her face hidden by the veil of her hair.

"Sorry about that I just wasn't feeling up to It." she croaked out, her voice was broken and hoarse, she had clearly been crying at some point in the night or during the day while he was at school.

"Are you okay?" he asked as he slowly stepped up to her. She did not look up at him even as he rested his right hand on her left shoulder gently.

"Yeah." Her answer was short and heartbreaking for him to hear. His hand slid upwards to tuck her dark hair behind her ear and she looked up slowly as if she was hurt and scared by his presence.

"You don't look okay." He stated pointedly as he motioned to her large tee shirt that had a bronze U covering most of the front and baggy shorts that fell just below her knees.

"I'm fine, I'm just thinking over my life choices right now." She muttered as she let the door close slowly before moving past him to sit at the very edge of her couch. He followed her movements and sat down beside her at a polite distance before placing his hands on his knees to stop them from shaking.

"Do you want to talk about it?" he asked without looking away from her darkened t.v. screen.

"No." she stated as she hid her face in her hands. Her breathing hitched a few times as her shoulders shook. He clenched his fists on his knees and ground his teeth together as he listened to her crying softly beside her. After a few moments with him sitting there unable to be of any help to her, he suddenly felt her wrap her arms around his waist and her wet cheek press against his bare bicep harshly.

"Rosa?" he asked as he jumped slightly at her touch.

"Can I just, can I just sit like this for a minute please?" she asked between quiet sobs. He turned to look down at the top of her head before turning to face straight ahead once again.

"Um, y-yeah it's okay you can sit like that." He stuttered softly as he felt his cheeks begin to burn.

"Thanks." She stated softly as he felt another warm tear slip between where their skin connected. They sat like that for a long time in the darkness as she forced herself to calm down until she was simply sitting there with her forehead leaning against his arm while her arms were simply draped behind his back and across his lap. He flicked his eyes to the side of her face before letting them settle on her t.v. once again. Slowly, he lifted his arm and draped it across her shoulders, pulling her against his side in the process. She did not fight against him as he did this, which surprised him to no end because before then they had no physical contact between them other than occasionally brushing against each other's hands when reaching for a paper or pencil.

He felt a jolt run down his spine as her hand slid up his stomach and chest to rest her hand on his shoulder. Her cheek slid against the side of his chest as she turned her head to look off to the side of where they sat. He could feel the heat of her cheek against his chest as she performed these small motions, which did nothing to help the ever warming burn of his own cheeks.

"Thank you." She said softly as she closed her eyes and sighed softly. He smelled nice, like coconuts and almonds, and his shirt held the slight hint of the smell from his detergent. He was warm also, a gentle heat that made her feel better just by being nearby. She squeezed him lightly before pulling back and hearing a soft discontent sound escape him.

"Are you feeling any better?" he asked after she adjusted herself back into an upright sitting position.

"Yeah, much." She smiled as she wiped her cheeks clean of her tears. He reached between them and grasped her free hand in his own before squeezing it tightly but not painfully so.

"That's good to hear." He stated as he looked pointedly at his feet without moving his hand, "I was worried about you since yesterday, I thought that you may have gotten yourself into a, what do you call it, a gamer daze?" he looked up at the ceiling as he spoke and smiled slightly as he felt her fingers lightly grip his in return.

"It's called a game coma and no, I broke my Gamebox." She let out a soft sigh as she sank down further in the couch cushion. He turned to look at her as his eyebrows rushed towards his hairline in his confusion. She turned her face towards his and gave him a small shrug, "I told you that I was rethinking myself." She stated flatly.

"That is a big change; I think you may be moving a bit fast on the whole new outlook on life thing." He stuttered over the words, trying to find the right way to say it. She shook her head slowly and looked down at her feet as her cheeks burned a light pink.

"Yeah, it was more of an accident during me thinking over some things. I kicked it a bit too hard." She mumbled to her toes which she was busily rubbing together. He chuckled lightly and looked towards her just as she pressed the button on her remote that caused the t.v. to turn on and cast a bright blue light over the room.

"Remind me to never make you have to kick me." He chuckled once again as he studied her features in the cool glow of blue light coming from the screen. Her cheeks were flushed but she was smiling which was a big step from how she was when he first saw her after she opened the door that afternoon. She had not moved her hand from his and he was just starting to ponder what the reason behind that was when she slid herself down to lean the side of her face against his arm once again.

"I think I was just scared of being alone, that's why I acted the way I did towards people. When that girl threw out the name Miss Goth to me it just sort of shocked me out of my way of thinking because I never thought that I had a label before." She sighed as she spoke.

"What do you mean?" he chuckled as he turned to look down at what he could see of her face, "You labeled yourself Sora right?" she smiled and lightly yet awkwardly smacking him with her free hand.

"That's a name, that's different." She stuck her nose in the air as she spoke. He smirked as he leaned over to poke the tip of it lightly; she was just about to giggle when it occurred to her just how casual they were acting towards one another. She jumped up quickly then and rushed towards the door leading to the hallway.

"Rosa?"

"I HAVE TO GO TO THE BATHROOM EXCUSE ME!" she shouted as she rushed through the halls doorway and turned into the first door on her right. The cold tile of the bathroom floor bit into her feet as she stumbled towards the sink after slamming the bathroom door. She took in a deep breath and turned on the cool water, watching as it drained from the mouth of the faucet straight into the pipes under the sink. It was freezing to her hands as she pushed them under the stream and even colder on her face as she splashed it across her face. The cold water running down her cheeks felt good as she continuously splashed it over them, the calming effect that it had over her was short lived however, when the sound of her front door opening and shutting from just one room over reached her ears. She turned and rested her bottom against her bathroom sink as she looked through her tightly shut bathroom door. She couldn't get close to him like that again, couldn't let herself think of herself as a normal person.

Her fingers gripped the edge of the sinks basin as she scowled down at the floor. No, she couldn't act normal at all, because she would never be able to be accepted by any normal person. After the many years she spent acting a part depending on the situation she feared that she would never be able to find out who she really was.

"Maxwell." She whispered as she grimaced at her own thoughts, "I'm so sorry." She pushed herself off of the sink and stood there limply from the waist up as she forced herself to promise not to let him get close to her again. Her lip quivered as she closed her blue eyes to hold back her tears. She wasn't someone who deserved anyone's affection or attention. Her own parent's did not care enough for her to stick around when they were off work. She was used to being lonely by this point; she could easily slip back into the same routine that she had carried out before. It was true that it hurt her at some level that she could not yet fathom, but it was a hurt she was accustom to and one that she could pretend wasn't there when she needed to. A knock on her bathroom door caused her to jump and look towards the sound. Her heart pounded loudly in her chest as the knock came again, a light precise thing that could only belong to one person.

"Rosa, there was a pizza delivery boy at the door. I paid him for the pizzas so I thought you might let me stay for a bit?" She gasped at the sound of his worried questioning voice and jumped back to lean against the wall by the sink.

"I don't know." She bit her bottom lip after mumbling the words.

"To be honest, I don't want to go home." She looked up at the closed door once again as his voice drifted through it. he sounded so sad at that moment that her heart broke for him and she moved to open the door, revealing him standing there holding the pizza boxes with his head bent forward.

"You, don't want to go home?" she asked softly. He shook his head and clutched the carboard boxes in his hands tighter.

"I, I have a complicated family life, you wouldn't understand." He stated softly. Her mind took her back to that stormy night and how terrified he had been of just knocking over a cup of silverware. She couldn't begin to hazard a guess as to what had scared him so terribly, but the look she saw in his eyes at that moment told her that the same fear still resided within him.

"You could stay here." She stated as she leaned against the doorframe and stared at the laughable cartoon mascot on the top pizza box, "I mean, if you wanted you could stay here, until you decide you want to go home." She added and reached out to flip open the lid of the box before grabbing a small slice of pizza. She gave him a friendly smile as she took a small bite off of the tip of the slice, "Of course it would be like two people who happen to live in the same place." She added as an afterthought.

"Are you serious?" he asked as his eyebrows raised in the middle to grant a hopeful expression to his features. She nodded to him before looking down at her pizza slice. He shifted on his feet as she seemed to be particularly intrigued by a lone peperoni on her thin slice of pizza in her hand.

"I should put these down eventually." He chuckled and turned on his heel before heading out of the hall and to her open concept kitchen. She followed and watched as he placed the boxes down on her sliding island before reaching into the top box and pulling his own slice from inside of it and turning to her as he took a bite.

"You are much cooler when you aren't playing the role of Mr. Perfect Student Council Prez." She smirked as she stepped up beside him to grab another slice.

"You think I'm cool?" he tilted his head as he took another small bite of his pizza. She chuckled as she gave him a shrug and leaned against the counter beside her stove.

"Not so much when you have to ask." She shrugged as she took another bite of her slice of pizza, pulling a pepperoni off and popping it in her mouth as well before she chewed the lump of food that had formed in her cheek. He watched her quietly through his bangs for a moment as she continued to savor her food happily and felt a soft smile dance across his lips. She seemed particularly curious about a certain green pepper at one point, which she peeled off the slice and nibbled on slowly as if to savor the flavor further than the rest. He watched her eyes close as she chewed slowly against the skin of the pepper in her mouth, a small line of light green tinted juice ran down her chin as he watched, and she cleaned it with a quick swipe of a thumb which was then shoved into her mouth to suck the juice clean.

"You really like green peppers." He teased as he placed his slice on the top of the closed pizza box and looked at the small lamp on the wall above her head rather than directly at her face.

"It's just food." She shrugged as she finished off her slice and toyed with the breading that was always left behind when she ate pizza. She ran it back and forth between her fingers before tossing it in a trashcan nearby her foot. She hopped down to the tiled floor and ran her bare toes over the smooth cool surface before striding over to look through the pizza boxes once again.

"Clearly with you actions speak louder than words." She looked up at him as he spoke and gave a small shrug.

"Do you want to shower first?" she asked as she sat down on a nearby barstool and kicked her feet like a child.

"Huh?" His eyes widened as he turned to look at her quickly.

"Personally I like to shower right before bed so I can go second." She continued. His stiff shoulders went slack as her words sank in and a soft smile played upon his lips.

"I could go first but I waste hot water." He shrugged and moved to dump the now empty pizza box in the trash can after pulling the flat pie out of it and lining the pieces up on a large plate.

"I don't mind." He watched in wonder as she simply seemed to bounce forward without any real effort, and as she landed easily in front of the stool she had been sitting on. She tossed what was left of her pizza slice in the trash can from across the room and turned to face the doorway leading into the hall, "I should at least call and tell my parents I have a friend staying over." She stated over her shoulder as she stepped towards the hallway, "I left my phone in my room." With that she was gone, leaving him standing alone in the kitchen that he imagined smelled like any college dorm room at any given time.