There I was, standing in front of my little brother's apartment door, with everything I owned cramped into my duffel bag, which wasn't even that big. I rather would've been anywhere else, but I was dead broke and had nowhere else to go.

I knew you were supposed to love your parents and your siblings, no matter what, but very simply put, my brother was a fucking douche bag. I had tried, I really did, but finding something lovable in him turned out to be a wild goose chase. I didn't feel guilty though, because there were no warm feelings on his side either. In fact, he resented me and let me know it every chance he got.
My guess was that he just couldn't handle the fact that in high school I was well known and liked, even admired by some, and he was just my little brother, who had to live in my shadow. At 16 I was already built like a brick wall and had very clear ambitions to become a professional mixed martial arts fighter and that's exactly what I did after I graduated. My brother started to go to the gym too and took boxing lessons, but if you enjoy eating fast food and smoking weed more than a good work out, you can't expect miracles and so it never amounted to anything. When he finally had to face reality and abandon his illusions of being an athlete, he ultimately decided to give into the demands of our father to follow in his footsteps and become an investment banker.

That was another reason why he hated me. I had told our father right after I had moved out to go fuck himself and hadn't talked to him since. My brother couldn't stand him either, but he wasn't smart enough for a scholarship and too lazy to work his way through college, so he had to suck up to him to get a free ride. Our father had more than enough money and was happy to groom my little brother, especially since his other son was such a disgrace. After my mom died, he buried himself in work and a few years later he started his own company. But with growing success he became more and more full of himself and it came as no surprise that he condemned all of my choices, they just didn't meet his pretentious standards. Maybe I should've thanked him, because his endless bullshit tirades made me work that much harder to finally be independent, but I didn't, I gave him a piece of my mind and never looked back. It was a proud day, I felt liberated, I was a man and I was living my dream.

But now, 7 years later, it had all gone to shit and I had to beg my little brother for a place to stay. A new low, even for me. I was at his mercy and he loved it. Probably the only reason why he had agreed to help me was to gloat, to shove my face into the fact that he was going on an expensive trip while I was practically homeless. But this wasn't the time for pride, I was desperate. Maybe in the next two weeks I could save some cash for a deposit, get my own place and then go from there.

I knocked on the door and after a minute my brother opened it and frowned deeply when he saw me.

"Oh, it's you." he said despisingly.

"Hi, can I come in?"

He just left the door open and went back to his room, so I followed him.

"I'm not ready yet, go wait in the living room." he ordered.


After maybe 45 minutes he finally came out, with a suitcase in his hand and a bag strapped around his shoulder.

"Here are the rules," he said. "Don't fucking touch any of my shit. You just go in there to sleep, that's it. And when I come back in two weeks, around 6 pm, I want you to be fucking gone, like you've never been here. You got that?"

Fuck you little brother, I thought to myself.


"That'll be 200 bucks."

I frowned.

"I thought you're letting me stay here for free."

"I'm not running a fucking charity and you're lucky I'm not charging you more. So take it or leave it."

Thanks a lot, you piece of shit.

"I'm completely tapped out right now, can I pay you when you get back ?"

"God damn it, you're so worthless, literally. Fine, leave it on my desk, but it better all be there."

Yeah, right, I'll take a dump on your desk, asshole.

"Of course."

He shook his head and started to head out.

"Hey, what about your roommate? How does he feel about me staying here?" I asked.

"I don't give a shit how that fucking faggot feels."

I clenched my fists.

"But you've told him, right ?"

"Yeah, but he probably didn't hear me, cause he was too busy staring at my crotch. Fucking pervert. Hey, if you rough him up for me I'll knock off 20 bucks of your rent. How about it?"

Suddenly I felt a longing to hear the sound of his teeth breaking.

"No thanks."

"Fuck you. You really are worthless. I should kick you out right now. You're lucky I don't have time to deal with your sorry ass."

No, you're the lucky one, cause I would've broken you in half and thrown you out of the window.

He just shook his head again, groaned dismissively and left. I felt the need to go to the gym, to let off some steam.

When I was still a fighter I mentioned "Doug's gym" a couple of times and got him a lot of new members, so he owed me, which is why he let me work out for free. I was really grateful for that, because it kept me sane.

I went to Nate's room, put down my bag and started to change the linen. I was almost done when I heard someone coming through the front door. Nate's roommate was my guess, so I hurried out to greet him.

I wanted to get along with him and I figured he was gay and he probably hated my brother too, so we had two things in common already. I was hoping that we could even become friends, because I was kind of lonely and could really use one.

I went looking for him, but it seemed that he had already disappeared into his room, so I knocked. When he opened the door I was taken aback a little. He was small, maybe 5'7", very skinny, short brown hair, green eyes and a delicate face. Really cute, but he also looked kind of young and fragile. Compared to him I was a giant. Probably more than twice his weight, 8" taller and my arms were bigger than his upper thighs. For some reason he was glaring at me.

"What the fuck do you want?" he asked angrily.

"Hi, I'm Dom. I'm gonna stay here for the next two weeks."

"I don't give a shit. Now get the fuck out of my way."

I took a step back and he stormed past me into the kitchen, got a soda from the fridge, hurried back to his room, without even looking up at me, and slammed the door in my face.

Damn, that went well. He must think I'm like my brother. No wonder he doesn't want anything to do with me, I thought to myself.

I packed my backpack and went to the gym. When I came back, three hours later, he was in the kitchen, cooking something very greasy, judging from the smell of it. I had picked up some groceries on the way, mostly fruits and vegetables. I stopped in front of the counter and contemplated for a second if I should put them away now or wait till he was done. He noticed and glared at me.

"What the fuck are you looking at? You're not getting any of my food!" he said.

"I don't want that greasy shit. It would probably give me heartburn. You shouldn't eat that either."

"Fuck you!"

I almost laughed. He was so over the top rude and aggressive it was kind of comical.

"Anyway, I just wanted to put away my groceries, if that's alright with you?" I said.

"No, I'm in here now, so fuck off."


I went to Nate's room and lay down on the bed. After a while I dozed off. When I woke up it was dark outside and my stomach growled, so I got up, took my groceries and went to the kitchen. He was sitting on the couch, watching TV. I washed and cut some fruits, put them on a plate and went over to the living room.

"Hey, do you mind if I watch some TV with you?" I asked.

"I'm watching CSI in 10 minutes, so fuck off."

"That's fine. Can I sit down ?"


I took a seat.

This is my chance, I thought. I'll be damned if I don't get this guy to like me, I mean, your enemy's enemy is your friend, right? So we should be best buds in no time. He just has to realize that I'm more or less the opposite of my brother.

I really needed someone to talk to, it had been a while since I had a friend and I was a little starved from some company. But he was a challenge that was for sure.

"What's your name?" I asked casually.

"It's none of your fucking business."

"I'm gay too, you know?"

"I have a Taser. I'll use it." he said, stormed off to his room and came back with a fucking Taser in his hand. He sat down and put it next to him, so I could see it. I couldn't help it, I had to smile. This was just too much. I had every intention to make nice with him, but now he was just asking for it. I had to fuck with him, just a little bit.

"A guy tasered me once. It stung, but it didn't stop me for a second," I said.

True story.

He hugged his legs to his chest and started to cry. I was stunned and it suddenly hit me. Shit, he was scared, he was really fucking scared and he had been the whole time. That's why he was so aggressive, he was trying to appear tough. He probably thought I was here to make him move out, which wasn't even that far off the truth. The poor guy, he looked so vulnerable, it was heartbreaking.

"This guy probably didn't get me right or the thing wasn't fully loaded. I bet you could knock me on my ass with yours," I said.

I should've just said that I had lied, but my ego didn't let me. The fact that I was unstoppable was one of a few things that made me feel good about myself.

He didn't react, he just kept crying.

"I would never hurt you... or touch you, in any way, I swear," I said.

Still no reaction.

"My brother is a fucking asshole."

That got his attention. He seemed to calm down a bit and for a second he looked in my direction. And then I realized that even if he now was convinced that I wasn't a threat, he was still embarrassed.

"I'll leave you alone now. I'm sorry. Good night."

I left and I didn't see him again that night. When I went to the bathroom, to get ready for bed, he was already gone.

The next day I had a great idea. I went to one of those stores, where they sell all kinds of cheap shit for under a dollar, bought a makeup-kit, lipstick, a hair barrette with a flower on it and some really tacky earring-clips, all for less than 5 bucks. When I came back to the apartment I knocked on his door and after a few seconds he opened it. He looked really uncomfortable and avoided my eyes.

"Hi. I was thinking, we should even things out a little. I bought this stuff, make-up mostly, so you can make me look like a transvestite and then take some pictures. That way, I'd be embarrassed as fuck and you'd have something to hold over my head. What do you think?" I said and smiled proudly.

"No thanks." he answered softly and closed his door.

I figured my idea was way too good to let it go to waste, so I went to the bathroom and started to paint my face. Half an hour later I looked like a fucking insane, beat up transvestite hooker, so I went back to his door and knocked again. When he saw me his eyes widened. I pursed my lips and put on a surprised expression. He started to laugh. His whole face suddenly changed, he looked different, vibrant, happy. It was a beautiful thing to watch.

"I'll get my camera," he said.

I made some faces for him, like putting my finger in my mouth and looking seductive or coy or blowing him a kiss. He couldn't stop cracking up and took a lot of pictures. When we were done he smiled at me.

"How do you know I won't post these on Facebook or something?" he asked.

"I have no idea what you just said."

Technology was a mystery to me.

"You know, put them on the internet?"

"I guess one of us has to start trusting the other, so I just pray that I didn't just make a horrible fucking mistake. But my brother doesn't seem to like you, so you're probably a really cool guy."

"What if I do post them, will you beat me up?"

"No, I won't, but please don't, alright?"

"Ok. Why are you so nice to me?"

"Why wouldn't I be? Besides, you're putting up with me staying here, so it's the least I can do."

"Are you really gay?"

"Yes, but I'm not out and I'd like to keep it that way."

"Does your brother know?"

"Hell no. He wouldn't let me stay here if he did."

"I see."

"I have to go wash this shit off my face."

"Ok, see you later. I'm Jesse by the way."

"Nice to meet you Jesse. See you later."

"And Dom?"


"Thanks," he said sincerely.

I had to work, so I didn't see him again that day, but when I got up around 11 the next morning and went to the bathroom he was sitting in the living room, reading.

"Good morning. Do you want some breakfast? I made porridge, do you want me to heat it up for you?" he asked.

"No thanks."

"I could put some bananas or something in it."

"I'm not hungry."

"Oh, ok, I'll just throw it out then," he said sadly and looked down. I felt bad instantly. He was just trying to do something nice for me.

"On second thought, I'd like some please. Plain is fine"

He looked up at me and smiled.

He is fucking adorable, I thought to myself.

"Coming right up," he said cheerfully.

When I came out of the bathroom there was a bowl waiting for me at the living room table, so I sat down and started eating. Jesse was watching me expectantly.

"It's really good, thanks," I said and he smiled.

"Do you have any plans for dinner yet? I could make whatever you like."

"That's really not necessary."

"But it's more fun to cook for two anyway, so it's no problem."

"What would you normally have?"

"Probably burgers or something. But I could make a salad. How about that?"

"Sure. If it's no trouble."

"Of course not. Do you wanna watch a movie with me later? You can choose and I'll pick it up at the video store."

This is getting strange, I thought. Two days ago he seemed to hate my guts and now he wants to be my best friend? Maybe he feels guilty. That's probably it.

"You know, it's not that I don't appreciate it, but you don't have to try so hard. I mean, I don't blame you for treating me like shit. So just relax, alright?"

He frowned very deeply.

"Try so hard?! Fuck you!" he said angrily and stormed off to his room.

I guess that was the wrong thing to say.

I knocked on his door and he opened it, but avoided my eyes.

"I'm sorry," I said, "I'm not used to being treated nicely. It's been a while and I obviously can't handle it. Please don't take it personally, alright?"

"Fine. Dinner's at 4," he said grimly and slammed the door in my face.

At 4 pm he pounded on my door.

"Get the fuck out here!" he yelled from the other side and I complied.

He was waiting for me in the living room and there were two big plates on the table with salad piled on it, so I sat down.

"I don't think I can eat that much," I said.

"Shut the fuck up and eat, you rude asshole."

"Yes, sir," I answered, grinning a little.

I took my fork and tried the salad. I was surprised how good it tasted. He really knew what he was doing.

"This is great," I said.

"I know."

"What's in the dressing?"

"In mine, onions, vinegar, cream and a couple of spices. In yours, the same, and my piss."

I almost choked when I burst out laughing.

"Really? I can't tell. It doesn't taste like sulfur."

His eyes widened and I could tell that he was trying hard to suppress a laugh.

"Very funny. I get it, I'm a demon, but wouldn't I spit fire? So my saliva had to be sulfur, not my piss. You're a fucking moron."

"No, you don't spit fire, you spit acid."

He stayed serious.

"Keep it up and next time I actually will piss in your food."

"You're right, I'm sorry. So, what do you study?"



"What you do you do, except for attacking Tokyo every once in a while?"

"Nothing really, I have two part time jobs, both shitty."

"Why don't you learn a real job? Or do you like being a looser bum?"

"It's not that easy. I kind of had a drinking problem for a while and also, I lost everything I had. Now I'm still trying to piece my life back together."

"So you did have a real job once?"

"Yeah, I was a mixed martial arts fighter. But then I broke my back and it all went downhill from there."

"Oh my god, you broke your back?"

"I'm fine. It just ended my career as a fighter."

"Were you any good?"

"Yeah, I'd say so. Didn't help me though."

"What was your song, when you came in?"

"The theme from 'Terminator 2'."

He laughed.

"You're shitting me, aren't you?"

"No, why?"

"That's kind of deranged. Were you a villain, did they boo you?"

"You're thinking of wrestling and no, they didn't."

"Same difference. What color were your speedos?" he asked and giggled.

"Again, that's wrestling, I wore shorts, like a boxer."

"And you just attacked each other any way you knew how, without any rules?"

"No, there are quite a few rules actually."

"Like what?"

"You can't attack your opponents eyes, groin, throat, spine, the back of their heads or any orifices for example."

"Orifices..." he repeated and burst out laughing.

"Even insults are prohibited."

"That's so fucking lame. It must have been really hard for you not to 'attack' any orifices."

He couldn't stop laughing.

"Very mature."

"No, seriously, think about it, you could've just said mouth, cause really, what else is there to attack or did they set that rule cause fighters were constantly giving each other wet willies?"

"There's also the nose."

"Come on, you work out like a body builder and learn all kinds of different martial arts just to shove a finger up someone's nose? That's ridiculous."

"Apparently it happened, so now there's a rule against it."

"It's a stupid sport anyway. Who in his right mind would voluntarily let himself get beaten up on a regular basis? Normal people try to avoid fights, you know?"

"Well, it's exciting to compete with the world's best fighters and if you're good you usually don't get hurt that badly."

"I thought you were good and a broken back is pretty fucking bad, wouldn't you say so?" he said mockingly.

"It was an accident."

"I can't believe you even got health insurance as a fighter."

"I didn't."

"What? Are you joking?"

"No, how do you think I went broke?"

"I don't know, you said you were an alcoholic."

"How much do you think it's humanly possible to drink in a day? Like two bottles of vodka maybe? That's 10 bucks, 300 a month."

"Oh yeah, I'm the moron here."

"It was just bad luck."

"No, the word you're looking for is 'insanity'."

"Yeah, maybe it was," I said ruefully. Jesse studied me for a second and frowned.

"You know, I have to say, make-up seems to really be your thing. I mean, you can't tell that your skin is actually green."

"What, I'm an alien now?"

"No, the incredible Hulk? Well, more like the incredibly stupid Hulk."

"To you, Yoda must seem like the Hulk."

"You're such an asshole," he said, but had to grin a little.

I was about two-thirds done with my salad and started to get full, so I slowed down. Suddenly he ripped the plate out of my hand.

"That's enough," he said. "The way you look I'm afraid that if you eat too much you're gonna explode."

"Don't you eat it though, you've already eaten twice your body weight, so you might explode too."

"Fuck you. I'll put in in the fridge, in case you get hungry later."

"Thanks. So, seriously, what do you do, aside from voodoo?"

"I study architecture."

"Oh, so you wanna become an architect?"

"No, a belly dancer."

"Why architecture?"

"Cause it's amazing. You get to create things that will possibly last for centuries and which are not only functional, but beautiful and shape the lives of countless people, the way they live and what they see every day."

"I've never thought about it that way. But there must come a lot of responsibility and pressure with it, right? Cause if you miscalculate something and the house turns out unstable they'd have to tear it down. Or if the roof caves in and kills someone, who's gonna pay for all that?"

"The insurance company."

"But you'd be fucked, right? Your career would be over?"

"If someone gets killed, probably, yes."

"So it's a big investment and you're putting it all on the line with every new project."

"You're better not trying to compare architecture to fighting, cause that would be fucking offensive."

"Fine, I won't then. So, are you in a fraternity?"

"No, they're for assholes."

"But they sure seem like a lot of fun."

"I'm fine on my own."

"Wait, but you do have friends, right?"

"That's none of your business."

"It would kind of make sense. You don't really seem like the college type."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"You swear a lot."

"Are you saying I don't seem sophisticated enough? Well, I have to dumb it down for you, don't I?"

"I didn't mean to be condescending."

"Well, I did, so fuck you."

"You know what? Thanks for the salad. See you around."

"No, wait... I'm sorry, ok?"

"It's alright, but I have to go soon anyway. I wanna hit the gym before work."

"Yeah, that's what you need, more muscles, cause you're not enough of a grotesque monstrosity already. And what about watching a movie?"

"Maybe tomorrow?"


He looked disappointed.

"I'd rather stay here with you, but I have to stick to my routine. My body is the only good thing I have left."


I went to the gym and to work afterwards. I was a bouncer at a club and occasionally people liked to pick a fight with me, just to see if they can take me. That night I got punched in the face. Shit happens. The next morning, on my way to the bathroom, Jesse saw my bruised lip.

"Oh my god, did you get into a fight?" he asked.

"I guess. You should see the other guy though. But wait, you can't, he's dead."

"Very funny. So what happened?"

"Some drunk asshole caught me off guard. He went down after just one punch though. I think I broke his jaw."

"Poor guy."

"Poor guy? He attacked me, for no reason."

"Well, you bring that out in people. I mean, I wanna attack you right now."

"Oh, do you?" I said and charged at him, intending to tickle him or something. He turned serious instantly, quickly took a few steps back till he hit a wall and looked at me fearfully.

Shit, he is still scared of me.

I stopped and held up my hands.

"I'm sorry. I was just messing around, I wasn't gonna do anything," I said.

"I know," he replied sullenly and clearly embarrassed.

"I have an idea. Punch or kick me as hard as you can, where ever you want, anything goes. That'll show you how much self-control I have and that you have nothing to fear from me."


"Come on, really put your back into it."

I closed my eyes, clenched my fists and braced myself for the impact. Suddenly I felt Jesse wrapping himself around my body. I opened my eyes and hugged him back. After a couple of seconds he let go and started to walk to his room.

"Dinner's at 4. You're staying for a movie afterwards, won't you?" he said.

"Sure, I wouldn't miss it."

"You better not, or I'll draw dicks on all your clothes with permanent marker."

I laughed.

"See you later."

At 4 we had dinner again, pasta with spinach sauce.

"I'll have to work out an extra hour tomorrow at the gym, but it's worth it, this is amazing," I said.

"You're just not used to real food, that's all."

"Well, you don't have to watch your weight, but I'm trying to keep my body-fat down. And there's nothing wrong with healthy food."

"No, but I'm guessing you only eat those vegetables and fruits I saw in the fridge, don't you?"

"Yeah. So?"

"That's one-sided. It's fine for a while, but in the long run you need more variety."

"Who do you think someone would rather listen to when it comes to nutrition, you or me?"

"Who in his right mind would starve themselves like that? You're not even a fighter anymore, so why not indulge yourself every once in a while? When was the last time you had a burger or chocolate? And just for the record, if people see you, they're not wondering what you eat to get that muscular, but what kind of steroids you use, so I think they'd rather listen to me. "

"People see you and they look for bite marks on your index finger from making yourself throw up."

"You fucking asshole!" he said spitefully and got up.

"No, I'm sorry, that was a stupid thing to say. It's just that I don't know a lot, but I do know how to stay healthy, so I get a little defensive about it. I didn't mean to be an asshole, please sit down."

He gave me a sharp look, but sat back down.

"I guess you do know more about nutrition than me, but that doesn't mean I'm wrong either and I'm not fucking bulimic."

"Of course you're not and you're right, maybe I am overdoing it a little."


"So, have you finished my voodoo-doll yet?" I asked, trying to lighten up the mood.

"No, it's too much of a hassle. I'd need a huge potato sack, a whole lot of garbage to fill it with, a balloon for the head, something very tiny and limp for your dick and a pickax instead of needles. And for what? If you'd suddenly jerk your arm against a wall or fall down, the whole building might collapse."

"Yeah, I didn't even try to make one of you. I mean, I don't have a microscope."

"Very funny. You know, I could probably take you in a fight."

"Oh really?" I asked, grinning.

"Yeah, I'm a lot smarter than you and faster too."

"It would be like a mouse trying to fight a rhino. The only way the mouse could win is if the rhino would swallow it and then choke to death."

"You're gonna choke on my first, asshole," he said and raised his fists. I quickly took both of his arms and held them together at his wrists with my left hand.

"What the..."

He struggled and tried to pry open my hand, but couldn't.

"Oh my god, let me go right now!" he demanded.

"Just use your superior intellect and think yourself out of it."

"I'm not kidding, you're gonna be sorry."

"I can do this all day."

"You're hurting me."

I let go of him instantly.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to. Are you alright?"


He got up, climbed behind me on the couch and took me into a choke hold, which made me smile.

"Aw, you're hugging me. How sweet," I said.

"I'm just demonstrating that I could easily beat you. If I wanted to, you'd be dead already."

I pretended to pass out and collapsed backwards on top of him. He gasped.

"Oh my god, you weight a ton. Get the fuck off me, right now!"

He tried to free himself, but he was trapped under me.

"You're crushing me, get off, please," he said and I quickly got up.

He glared at me.

"Are you alright?"

He jumped at my legs and tried to push them together, to make me fall down, so I grabbed him around the waist and threw him over my shoulder.

"I think it's time to cool you off. A nice cold shower should do the trick," I said and started to walk to the bathroom with him.

"You wouldn't dare. Put me down or I'll murder you in your sleep."

"Keep talking and I'll shave off your eyebrows too."

We arrived in the bathroom and I pulled back the shower curtains.

"No, wait. I give up."

"You still think you could take me?"

"No, I can't. Now put me down."

I gently put him down. He looked at me angrily and we started to walk back to the living room.

"I fucking hate you," he mumbled.

"What did you just say?" I asked warningly.

"Nothing," he said defiantly.

"That's what I thought."

"I need to get me a gun."

"The recoil of a gun would probably launch you like a rocket."

"Fuck you."

We sat back down on the couch.

"You know, if you'd catch me off guard and be vicious enough, you probably could take me," I said.

"Don't fucking patronize me... and hell yeah I could."

"Have you ever been in a fight?"


"Well, good for you."

"How much do you work out?"

"Three times a week, for two hours."

"That little? That can't be right."

"It's not about how much you train, but how effectively and also, you need to give your muscles time to rest for them to grow."

"How long does it take to look like you?"

"Maybe eight months, if you're disciplined enough."

"You have washboard abs, don't you?"


"Lift up your shirt. I wanna touch them."

"What? Why?"

"Don't flatter yourself, I just wanna know what they feel like. We're not having sex."

"Yeah, right, sex with you? I can picture it now. 'Don't fucking look me in the eyes!... My grandmother gives better head than you!... Oh my god, that's the biggest dick I've ever seen!'" I said in a girly voice and Jesse giggled.

"Shut up and show me your abs already."

I lifted up my shirt and he started to curiously touch and poke my abs.

"Stop flexing them for a second," he said.

"I'm not."

"Get the fuck out. Flex them then."

I did. His eyes widened and his mouth opened a little.

"That's just unnatural," he said and started probing my abs again.

"Now it's your turn," I said after a minute.

"I don't have any abs."

"Sure you do."

He hesitantly lifted up his shirt. I quickly put my finger in his belly button and wiggled it around. He jerked back and giggled.

"Stop that, you might accidentally poke a hole in me."

"You're right, you're like a piece of paper."

"I am not. Hey, how come you don't smell like anything?"

"What do you mean?"

"You just smell like you, not like any products. Don't you at least use shampoo or deodorant?"

"No, too expensive, but I don't sweat easily, cause my resting heart rate is very low. Why? Does it bother you?"

"I guess not, it's just weird."

"Well, you smell like a drug store delivery truck crashed into another drug store delivery truck. I don't see how that's better."

"You know who else don't use any products? Animals."

I grunted loudly and we both laughed.

"You don't have a boyfriend, do you?" he asked.


"When was the last time you had one?"


"You've never had a boyfriend, ever?"


"So you were always by yourself? That's fucking sad."

"Well, I had a cat once, but I accidentally sat on her and the next day she was gone. My guess is that she squeezed herself through a tilted window."

He laughed.

"No way, you're making that up."

"Unfortunately no."

"You really are a menace, the poor thing probably died."

"Yeah, so you better not fall asleep on the couch while I'm around."

"Well, the ground will be trembling when you come stomping by, so I think I'll wake up. The cat must've been used to it already."

"So, what about your love life?"

"I had a boyfriend once, but I don't wanna talk about that piece of shit."

"That bad?"


"Maybe I was better off alone after all."

"Yeah, probably."

"Do you wanna watch a movie now?"

"Sure, let me make some popcorn. Do you want it salty or sweet?"

"I don't want any. I have some carrots though, we could eat those. Would be much healthier."

"Do I look like a fucking rabbit to you?"

"No, you look like an earthworm."

"Fuck you and don't be an asshole, I make it myself, it's awesome."

"Fine, sweet then."

We both went to the kitchen and while he made the popcorn I washed the dishes. When it was all done we got back on the couch.

"What are we watching?"

"The new 'Star Trek'-movie."

"I don't know, I usually avoid science fiction. I don't get present day technology, so I'll probably be lost and isn't 'Star Trek' kind of brainy?"

"To you the teletubbies are brainy. This is a cool movie, you'll like it and you can just ask if you don't get something."


He turned on the TV, put in the DVD and we started watching.

"Why aren't they floating around? I mean, there's no gravity in space, right?" I asked.

"Cause it's a fucking movie, dumbass."

I laughed.

During the movie my back started to hurt, so I leaned forward and sat on the edge of the couch.

"What's wrong?" Jesse asked.

"It's my back, it acts up sometimes."

"Do you want me to give you a massage?"

"Thanks, but it doesn't come from tense muscles. Besides, with your feeble, boney little hands it would probably feel like two spiders crawling around my back."

He laughed.

"You asshole. I have an iron grip."

"Like an iron paperclip maybe."

"Fine, I was grossed out by the thought of touching you anyway."

"You know I'm kidding, right? I do appreciate the offer."

"What about painkillers? I have some in the bathroom, would they help?"

"Yeah, but I don't wanna put you out like that, they're expensive."

"Don't be stupid."

He went to get the painkillers and when he came back he handed me two pills from the bottle and a glass of water.


"You can keep the rest."

"No, I can't"

"Don't fucking argue with me, it's no big deal and you need them more than me. Besides, I'm not a broke ass bum like you, I can just buy another bottle."

"Alright, thanks."

We continued watching the movie. To my surprise I did actually enjoy it.

On Saturday, late in the afternoon, I was sitting in the living room, watching TV, when Jesse came out of his room and positioned himself in front of me.

"Do I look flamboyant to you?" he asked.

"Yes," I answered without thinking.

"I do not!" he protested.

"I thought you were going for that."

"Fuck you!"

He kept standing there, looking down on himself.

"What is it about me?" he asked unsurely.

"Well, for starters, the scarf. What's up with that? It's like 70 degrees outside."

"It's a loop."

"It's fucking gay. And the rest of your clothes, why does everything has to match color-wise? No straight guy would ever dress like that, at least not on purpose."

"You don't even know what you're talking about."

"I know that no one has ever suspected me to be gay. A blind guy could guess your sexuality."

"Do I sound gay too?"

"No, you sound like you need an exorcism."

"Why am I even talking to you?"

"Hey, listen, you look great. You're gonna be the bell of the ball."

"You're such an asshole."

"What, I just gave you a compliment?"

"Belle of the ball? 'Belle' means beauty, female."

"Oh, I didn't know that. I thought it was 'bell', like the one you ring."

"But that doesn't make any sense."

"Well, a lot of old expressions don't."

"To you maybe, cause you're not the sharpest tool in the shed."

"I was just trying to me nice."

"Fine. Thanks for the stupid fucking compliment."

"You're welcome."

He rolled his eyes at me and disappeared into his room.

Later that day I went to work. I came back around 2 in the morning, showered and was lying in bed when I suddenly heard the front door open and then a thud. I got up and went looking what it was. I saw Jesse sitting on the floor, next to the door, leaning against the wall.

"Hey, are you alright?" I asked.

"I fell down and now I can't get up," he said sadly. He was crying and sounded drunk. I helped him up and walked him to his bed, where we both sat down.

"What's wrong?" I asked.

"Do you think I'm ugly?"

"No, I think you're beautiful."

He looked up at me in surprise.

"Really ?"


"I was in this bar and I sat there for hours, but no one was hitting on me the whole time. What's wrong with me?"

"Nothing, but you know what it might be? When you're insecure you get this defensive look, that's probably what scares a lot of guys off and they also think you're out of their league anyway, so they don't bother."

"Maybe. But you really think I'm good looking? You're not just saying that to make me feel better?"

"No, you're gorgeous."

"Do you wanna have sex with me?"

"I'd love to, but you're drunk and vulnerable, so I can't, I'm sorry."

He wrapped himself around me, so I closed my arms over him and stroked his back. After a while he let go, but kept holding my arm.

"Will you stay with me tonight, please?" he asked. He looked so sad, there wasn't much I would have said no to right then.

"Of course."

"Can you help me with my clothes?"

I helped him strip to his briefs and t-shirt and we both got under the covers. He cuddled himself against me and fell asleep.

The next morning I woke up first and watched Jesse till he opened his eyes.

"Good morning," I said.

"Morning. Wait, what the hell are you doing in my bed? Did you rape me?" he asked, alarmed.

"What? No, you asked me to stay with you."

"I'm just fucking with you," he said, giggling, which made me grin.

"You little shit."

He turned serious.

"Dom? About having sex, I don't wanna sleep with you, ok?"

"Yeah, I figured that much. I mean, I'm a 'grotesque monstrosity' after all."

"No, you're not, you're insanely hot and you know it. It's just that my first boyfriend was only interested in sex and I don't wanna feel used like that ever again. Do you understand?"

"Sure, but what about last night ?"

"I was desperate, I just wanted to feel desirable."

"Alright, I understand."

"Now, let's get back to sleep, my head's still spinning."

He laid his head on my chest and his hand on my stomach.

"So, I'm insanely hot?" I asked, grinning.

"Stop talking, you'll make me throw up."

The next two days I had to work most of the time, so I didn't see much of him. The hours dragged on worse than usual and I felt empty. Maybe it was because of Jesse. Whenever I was with him I really enjoyed myself and the night I had spent with him I had realized how much I missed being close to someone.

On the following Monday I came back from work around 1:30 am, took a quick shower and went to bed. But I couldn't fall asleep. The feeling of Jesse's warm body in my arms kept haunting me. So I got up and headed to his door. I just stood there for a few minutes, turned around and walked away, stopped, walked back, sighed and finally knocked softly.

What the fuck am I doing, I asked myself, and decided to return to my bed. After a few steps Jesse's door suddenly opened and he peaked out drowsily.

"I thought I heard a knock," he said.

"Yeah, sorry. Did I wake you?"

"No, I was belly dancing. What's up?"

"Oh, I was just wondering... You know what? Forget it. I'm sorry that I woke you, good night," I said, turned around and started to walk away again. Suddenly Jesse grabbed me by the hand and pulled me towards his room. I gave in and let him lead me to his bed. He got in and lifted up his blanket invitingly. I hesitated for a second, but then I lay down beside him. He cuddled up against me and I put my arm around him.

"Good night," he said contentedly. I smirked and closed my eyes. I was asleep in less than 5 minutes.

In the morning I woke up before Jesse again and watched him for maybe an hour. It was peaceful, but after a while a sense of dread crept up in me and I realized that I shouldn't get used to this kind of closeness, because it wasn't going to last.

Soon I'll have to move out and be on my own again and the more time I spend with Jesse now, the worst it will feel.

I was so lost in my thoughts that I didn't notice that he had already opened his eyes and was watching me curiously.

"Good morning. What's with the long face?" he asked.

"Morning. No, I was just thinking about something."

He lifted himself on top of me, so that his upper body was lying on mine and our heads were close together and then looked at me observantly.

"About what?"

"It's nothing, really."

"Well, then stop being a grouch and turn that frown upside down."

He touched me with both of his index fingers on the sides of my mouth and then forcefully pulled my skin upwards. I burst out laughing and he started to laugh too.

"There you go," he said.

He kept kneading my face and stretched it into all kinds of grimaces. It cracked him up, so I let him.

"See, now you're so happy that it's making you blush," he said and slapped both of my cheeks with a loud smack. We both laughed.

"Are you nuts? Do you think I'm some kind of toy? Well, I guess I have to tickle some sense into you," I said and his face dropped.

"Don't you fucking dare!" he said so sharply and overly threatening that he had to giggle, but quickly pulled himself together and glared at me.

"Watch me, bitch," I said dryly and before he could respond I grabbed him by the waist, threw him on his back and started to tickle him mercilessly. He squirmed and squealed, but after a few seconds he grabbed both of my wrists and wrestled me back, till he was on top of me again and pinned my arms behind my head. He smiled proudly, but then he suddenly turned serious, frowned a little and lay down beside me. I put my arms around him and he started to softly stroke my chest.

"Are you alright?" I asked, surprised by the sudden change in his mood. He just lifted his head and gave me a gentle kiss on the cheek, then he resumed his position. I was a little taken aback by this. We lay there for probably 10 minutes and neither of us said a word. I figured he might be embarrassed, so I tried to lighten things up a little.

"You know, you fart in your sleep. I mean, it's like having someone next to you who's punching a bagpipe all night long," I said.

"Oh my god!" he yelled and burst out laughing. "Well, compared to the way you smell my farts are like air freshener."

I laughed

"Do I really smell bad?" I asked.

"No. Shut up."

The following days we ate most of our meals together, watched TV and I slept almost every night in Jesse's bed.

On Saturday we both weren't in the best mood, because I had to move out soon.

"When are you leaving?" he asked.

"Can't wait to get rid of me?"

He frowned.

"That's right asshole."

"My brother will be here around 6 tomorrow evening and he wants me to be gone by then, so I guess I'll leave at 5."

"That's bullshit. You're my guest now. Just put your stuff in my room and you can stay for as long as you want."

"I don't wanna cause any trouble."

"Fuck that prick. I can handle him."

"I'm sure you can, but still, it's not worth it."

"You're probably relieved that you don't have to put up with me anymore, is that it? Were you only nice to me so I wouldn't throw you out or something? Well, fuck you then, you can leave right now for all I care."

"Don't be like that. You know that's not true. I'll stay if you want."

"Don't do me any favors, asshole."

"I do wanna leave early, cause if my brother comes home and talks shit about you I'm gonna put him through a fucking wall. I hate that I have to leave. I'm gonna miss the fuck out of you."

"Are you gonna cry now?" he asked sarcastically.

"You little shit, you'll probably have forgotten my name by next week."

"I can barely remember it now. I know it sounds like 'dong', which is fitting, since you're such a dick."

"Alright, I'll stay for another day, if that's ok with you. And can I come visit you every once in a while?"

"You better, at least once a week, you got that?"

"At least."

"Good. And I give you my permission to think about me while you're jerking off."

"Great, now I don't have to feel guilty anymore."

He laughed.

"That's kind of gross."

"Well, you know what they say, masturbation is the sincerest form of flattery."

He wrapped himself around me.

"I'll really miss you."

"I know."

"Hey, I have an idea. Can you handle being in a bar?"

"I guess, why?"

"How about we go out tonight?"

"I can't afford that."

"It's on me."

"No, I wouldn't be comfortable with that."

"Come on, we could get something to eat and then we go to a bar and I'll get hammered. You can repay me by carrying me back here."

"You mean literally carry you?"

"No, I'll just have a couple of cocktails, it should be fine. So, what do you say?"

"I don't know."


"But I don't wanna go to a gay bar."


"Alright then."

"Great, we'll have so much fun, you'll see."

We went out later that night, had dinner at an actual restaurant and then found a bar where I watched Jesse get drunk. But we had a lot of fun. I couldn't remember the last time I had laughed that much and he was a hilarious drunk. We stayed till almost 4 in the morning and I had to carry him back to the apartment, literally. He actually fell asleep in my arms, it was adorable.

"Wake up, we're here," I said.

"Shh, just keep walking, this is really nice."

"Come on, unlock the door or I'll have to drop you."

"Don't drop me!" he said, alarmed.

"I won't, just open the door."

He fumbled around in his pocket till he found his key and after a few tries he managed to let us in.

"Do you wanna go to bed right away and do you need to use the bathroom first?" I asked.

"You just wanna watch me pee," he answered and giggled.

"No, I'd let you go by yourself of course."

"But I can't go by myself, I'm too drunk."

He giggled again.

"Alright, then I'll go with you."

"But then you'll see me naked."

"I won't look, I promise."

"Or, we both pee, at the same time, then we'll be even."

"I don't have to pee."

"Well, then I don't have to either."

"Fine, let's go to bed."

I carried him to his bed, put him down and helped him strip, then I took off my clothes too and joined him. He cuddled himself against me and sighed contentedly.



"I have to pee."


"No, I'm just kidding."

"Good night then."


"Yes?" I asked, smiling.

"Do you wanna be my boyfriend?"

"You're drunk."

"No... I mean, yes, but I can still think straight... no, wait, that's gross," he said and burst out laughing. "What I meant to say is, I can still think very clearly, I'm just less insecure, which was the whole point of getting drunk. So, what do you say?"

"I don't know. My brother would find out. I'm not sure I could handle that."

"That's what you're concerned about? The opinion of your asshole brother, who you don't even like? Well, at least now I know how you feel about me. You know what, get the fuck out!" He yelled the last part, backed away from me and turned around.

"Come on, my brother would tell everyone I know. You're basically asking me to out myself. Don't you think that's kind of a big deal?"

"Yeah, I get it, I'm not worth it, now fuck off already."

"We could keep it a secret."

"We really fucking can't."

"Can I at least think about it for a while?"

"Go to hell."

"Alright. Fuck it then. I'm in."

"Well, too late, I'm over you."

"Come on, what can I do?"

"No, this was a bad idea. You're better off without me anyway."

"That's bullshit. I'm miserable without you."

"No, you were right, it's too much to ask, I'm not worth it. And you'd get frustrated with me real fast, believe me. Then we'd break up and never speak to each other again. That's the last thing I want. Let's just be friends."

"Is this about sex?"

There was a long pause.

"Maybe," he said quietly.

"Alright, that's easy. We'll just take it very slowly for the first couple of weeks or even months. And if we do something, we could have a rule that you have to cum at least twice as often as me and always before I do. How does that sound?"

He turned around and looked at me unsurely.

"That's actually very sweet. But what if you get impatient or frustrated and start resenting me?"

"I'm very fucking disciplined, so it wouldn't be a problem, trust me."

"So, you really like me?"

"No, I think I more than like you. I'm pretty sure I'm falling for you. How do you feel about me?"

"Meh... you're ok."

I laughed.

"Are we boyfriends now?"


"Great, I'm happy too."

"You know, your dick better not be too small... or too big, cause that's a deal breaker for me."

"You want me to show it to you right now?"

"No, I'm drunk, so it's more likely that I throw up when I see it."

"I haven't seen yours either and that's like 70% of the reasons why I wanna be with you."

"It's beautiful."

"Don't you wanna know what the other 30% are?"

"No, I don't asshole. And it better not be some fetish, like my feet or something."

"It isn't. Do you have any fetishes?"

"Well, I have an urge to punch you in the face all the time. It's not sexual though, just a natural reaction to your face."

"I guess I have to tickle that out of you."

"Don't even think about it. It's a good thing I have my Taser, I'm gonna train you like a dog."

"Lucky me."

"No, there's a upside too. If you behave I'll pet and feed you."

"Are you gonna neuter me too?"

"No, not literally anyway. Speaking of your balls, you shave them, don't you?"

"No, I don't."

"You really are like an animal. Well, start tomorrow, they always have to be smooth, in case I wanna fondle you."

"I'm not gonna do that."

"Come on, it feels really good and looks a lot better too. Please?" he said and looked at me puppy-dog-eyed, which made me laugh.


"You don't have to, it's ok," he said disappointedly and looked down.

"Fine, I'll do it."

He smiled brightly.

Damn, he is just too adorable to deny him anything. I'm fucked, but I couldn't care less, I thought to myself.

"Let's get some sleep."

"Good idea."

He kissed me on the cheek and cuddled himself against me. We both fell asleep in minutes.

Around 11 am I woke up and watched Jesse for a while. Half an hour later he opened his eyes.

"Good morning, how are you feeling?" I asked.

"Morning. Like I've been chewed up and spat out."

"Do you remember the conversation we had last night?"

"No, what was it about?"

"We decided to be boyfriends, does that ring a bell?"

"What? You, my boyfriend? Yikes, that's just wrong."

"That's not funny."

"You're damn right it's not, I must have been really out of it. Oh my god, you didn't molest me, did you?"

"I'm out of here."

He burst out laughing and wrapped himself around me.

"Wait, it's coming back to me now," he said.

"You're a dick."

"I'm charming. Now be a good boyfriend and get me some breakfast. And fucking hurry, if I don't have my coffee in less than 5 minutes I'm breaking up with you."

I sighed and started to get up, but he grabbed my arm.

"I'm kidding, I'll make breakfast. You can take a shower and wash off the grumpiness," he said.

"I am tired."

"It's ok, we'll do nothing all day but lie on the couch together and take naps between cuddling."

"Sound good."

"Let's go then."

"Hey, how about this? You set the coffee machine and go take a shower and I'll get us fresh rolls from the bakery?"

"I might not break up with you after all," he said, smiling, and kissed me on the cheek.

"Do you want anything else?"

"Donuts would be nice, with chocolate."

"How many?"


"You're gonna eat 4 donuts?"

"Well, 3 at least and if they're really good you have to eat one too."

"Alright, see you in a bit."


I came back 15 minutes later with a small bag in one hand and a newspaper in the other.

"Hey, why did you buy a newspaper? Ever heard of the internet?" he asked.

"I got it for the apartment ads. Do you wanna read it first?" I answered and offered him the newspaper, but he just looked at me sharply.

"Drop that shit!" he yelled and slapped it right out of my hand. We both laughed.

"What the hell?"

He picked it up and threw it in the trash.

"You don't need an apartment, you live here now."

"I can't just move in with you."

"Of course you can. And if you bring up your brother I'm gonna stab you in the groin."

"But if I have to work late I'll wake you and when the new semester starts you'll be tired in the morning or you'll oversleep and might even miss a lecture."

"I'd rather be tired than alone, now stop arguing."

"How can you be sure that I'm not just with you to save money or something?"

"Cause you wouldn't do that. But I get it, you don't wanna live with me, whatever... I'm going back to bed," he said sadly and started to walk to his room.

"I love living with you, I just wanted to make sure you're really ok with it. But you have to let me pay at least half the rent, I won't budge on that."

"Fine. That's 50 bucks."

"You pay 100$ for rent?" I asked, grinning.

"Yeah, you think I'm lying? Well, you can't call the landlord... cause you don't have his number. And he'd kick us both out anyway. So you can't prove me wrong, can you?"

"My brother wanted 200 for two weeks."

"Yeah, but he's a fucking prick. You're not paying him, are you?"


"Good. So it's decided then, you'll stay and you'll pay me 50 bucks a month."

"And for groceries."

"You can pay for fruits, cause I don't eat that shit, but that's it."

"That won't do."

"In case you haven't realized it yet, I'm wearing the pants in this relationship, so what I say goes, got it?"

"Oh really?"

"Please? If you say yes I'll let you kiss me on the mouth after breakfast," he said teasingly.

"Alright, but I'll take you out on the weekends."

"You're impossible. Fine. But we'll take turns."


"Let's eat."

We ate breakfast in the living room, mostly in silence, cause we were tired.

"So, ready for your kiss?" he asked when we were both finished.


"No tongue though, I still feel kind of sick and I want our first real kiss to be just right."


He got up and sat down on my lap, placed his right hand on the side of my head and leaned in. Our lips gently touched. After a second I felt him smile and then he broke the kiss.

"Your lips are really soft," I said.

"Yours are really firm."

"You mind?" we asked simultaneously.

"Yinks!" he yelled. "You can't talk till you've kissed me again."

I nodded and kissed him, longer and more intense this time. After a few seconds we reluctantly separated.

"No, I think your lips are amazing. What about you?" I said.

"Well, I haven't thrown up on you yet, have I?"


"No, they're great."


"Hey, you're poking me. Quick, think of something that turns you off. Like an old lady's vagina, all smelly and floppedy, queefing around."

"You're so crude sometimes," I said, laughing.

"You mean cute, don't you?" he asked and looked at me sharply.

"That too."

We both smiled.

"Hey, could you hold me for a while? Like you did when you were carrying me last night?"


I took him in my arms and he curled up and clung to me.

"Mmmh," he hummed happily.

"Sleep tight," I whispered.

"What? You think I wanna go to sleep? And you were willing to hold me like this for however long that would've taken?"

"Yeah, of course."

"Wow... that's so sweet. I mean, damn, I have to start being a lot nicer to you, so you won't leave me."

"I'm not planning to, don't worry."

"You want another kiss?"


We stayed on the couch for the next couple of hours and couldn't go longer than 10 minutes without kissing each other. Around 1 pm Jesse made us lunch and we got even more tired after that.

"Do you wanna take a nap? I'm fucking beat," he said.

"Good idea, let's go."

"No, let's sleep here, on the couch."

"There's not enough room for the both of us."

"Sure there is. Just lie down on your back."

I did and he carefully climbed on top of me and lay down, so I closed my arms over him. He was very light and seemed to fit perfectly where he was. When he raised his head to look at me we both smiled at each other.

"Are you comfortable?" he asked.

"Very. You?"

"Yeah, you're like a warm air mattress."

We fell asleep soon after. Hours later I woke up from the sound of the front door opening and closing.

"What the fuck is this?!" my brother yelled. Jesse woke up too and looked around.

"Oh, hi Nate," he said casually.

"You turned my brother into a faggot?"

"Yes, I did. And you're next."

"Like hell I am."

"We'll see. By the way, we've fucked pretty much everywhere in the apartment, your bed, your desk, the kitchen counter... well, you get the picture."

"You fucking freaks, I'm calling the cops."

"What are you gonna tell them, you homophobic prick? It's your word against both of ours and we'll say you threatened to kill us."

"I'm outta here."

He stormed out the door and we both laughed. Jesse got off of me and we sat down beside each other.

"Do you think he might move out?" he asked.

"If he does I could rent his room. Or we could look for another apartment, one we don't have to share. I know you'd have to give up this place, so in case we split up I'd move out."

"You think we'll split up?"

"I hope not, but living together is a big step most couples take a lot later in their relationship. Maybe it's too soon and we'll drive each other crazy after a while, who knows."

"Let's not let it come to that, ok? If living together doesn't work for some reason, we should get separate places right away, so we won't break up."

"Deal. Maybe it won't come to that though. Maybe we're meant to be together," I said and winked at him.

"Well, on the one hand we do look a little odd together, but we kind of complement each other too, don't you think?"

"Yeah, I do."

"Hey, will you hold my hand in public? I mean, not all the time, but sometimes, maybe?"

"It'll be weird for me, but I'll try not to freak out. That's all I can promise right now."

"Fair enough. What if someone calls me a name or threatens me, will you beat him up for me?"

"You mean defend your honor? I won't attack just anyone who looks at you funny, but no one will touch you without getting their heads kicked in, that's for damn sure. Do me a favor though, don't go around riling people up, so I have to fight them, alright?"

"No, don't worry, I won't abuse my 'power'. Unless someone's wearing the same outfit as me, then I can't guarantee anything."

"Fair enough."

"You are a 'top', aren't you?"

"You mean in bed... Well, yeah, I guess I am. It never really occurred to me to try it the other way around."

"And you'd never consider it, would you?"

"Why, wanna do me?" I asked, grinning. He looked very serious and kind of insecure.

"I don't know... but you wouldn't let me do it anyway, would you? It's ok, I don't care, whatever," he said and looked down.

"Of course I would. And if I don't hate it, not just once. And I don't expect the same from you by the way."

"Go to hell."

"What? Oh, you think I'm kidding? Well, I'm not."



"Is there something you haven't told me yet? Something really horrific about you? Are you a serial killer maybe, or a necrophiliac... or do you have some disease?"

"No, I've never killed anyone and I'm healthy as a horse. But come on, who doesn't like to defile a nice decomposing corpse every once in a while?"

"That's gross. And I mean it, there has to be something, cause why on earth wouldn't you have a boyfriend yet?"

"I am... was in the closet, remember? And I'm very picky."

"Yeah, sure, I bet if your brother had a different roommate you'd be with him right now."

"You're wrong and stop putting yourself down, it's not only unfair to you, but to me too. You're special and I'm lucky as hell to have met you. And that's that."

He hesitated and studied me with a frown for a few seconds.

"I'm falling for you too, you know?" he said softly.

"It's kind of scary, right?"

"Yeah, a little bit."

"You know, I have a feeling that everything will be just fine," I said and we smiled at each other.

Jesse made us dinner and after that I had to go to work.

The next morning I suddenly felt a hand over my mouth and nose and woke up with a start, gasping for air. Jesse was kneeling beside me and smiled at me innocently.

"Good morning sleepy head," he said.

"What the fuck was that?" I asked, a little agitated.

"Well, I wanted you to wake up."

"And you couldn't think of any other way to do that?"

"I thought about kissing you awake, but I figured it might be weird doing that while you're asleep."

"So you tried to suffocate me? That's less weird in your opinion?"

"Oh relax, if I wanted to suffocate you I would've tied you to the bed and then duct taped a plastic bag over your head."

"Sounds like you've given it some thought already."

"See what happens when you neglect me?"

"You mean when I'm not up before you, cause I worked half the night? What time is it anyway?"


"Why the hell would you wake me this early?"

"I just wanted to tell you not to get up before I call you, cause I'm making breakfast."

"You know how else you could've made sure I don't get up? By just letting me fucking sleep."

"No, that's crazy talk."

"Can I go back to sleep now please?"



Jesse frowned and looked at me guiltily.

"Dom? I know it was a stupid thing to do. I'm sorry. I won't do it again."

"It's alright."

"Are you mad at me?"

"No, of course not, how could I ever be mad at that adorable face of yours? You're like Medusa's counterpart, you just have to look at me and I'm getting soft like jello," I said, grinning.

"Great, that's what you wanna hear from your boyfriend, that if he looks at you he can't help getting soft."

I laughed.

"You know what I mean."

"Yeah, I understand, I put you off."

"Come on, stop it."

"It's fine, whatever," he said, pouting a little.

"Alright, let's set this straight. Whenever you're in my arms, my hearts beats a whole lot faster, cause it has to keep up with all the fucking endorphins. And every time I kiss you, I lose my mind a little bit, cause it's almost impossible to process how fucking sexy you are. There. Happy now?"

Jesse smiled brightly.

"That sounds much better. You can go back to sleep now. See you later."

"Hey, you forgot something."

"What?" he asked, confused. I sat up and kissed him on the mouth.

"There you go."

He just giggled and left.

A couple of hours later I was woken by the touch of Jesse's soft lips on my mouth.

"Wakey wakey, hands off snakey," he whispered and I laughed.

"Now that's a great way to wake up. And I wasn't touching myself by the way," I said, grinning.

"You better not, that's cheating."

"Seriously? I'm not allowed to jerk off?"

"Not by yourself you're not."


"Cause you have to save yourself for me."

I laughed.

"What? You're joking, right?"

"No. Have you ever not jerked off for more than two weeks?"

"I don't think so, no," I said hesitantly.

"The longer you wait the more sensitive you get. So if we wait like, let's say a month, and then I'll get my hands on you, you'll cum so fucking hard that you won't believe your senses. It's so fucking worth it. Just trust me."

"Alright, done, no more touching myself."

Jesse smiled and gave me a quick kiss.

"Come on now, breakfast is getting cold."

I got up and followed him into the living room. I raised my eyebrows in surprise and grinned when I saw the table. It was like a buffet, there were fruits, rolls, bagels, jam, peanut butter, bacon, eggs, cheese, coffee, orange juice, milk, even muffins.

"Wow, you've made all of this just for the two of us?"

"You're right, this was a stupid idea," he said sadly and looked down.

"No, it's amazing actually."

"Really? It's too much though, isn't it?"

"We'll just skip lunch and it'll be fine. Come on, let's dig in."

He smiled at me and we sat down beside each other and started eating.

"It's all fresh and I've made the muffins from scratch," he said.

"That's impressive. But what's the occasion?"

"You'd just make fun of me."

"I won't, I promise."

"It's our two day anniversary," he said shyly and blushed.

"That's really sweet."

"You think so?"

"Absolutely. Very romantic. And being with you is indeed worth celebrating, every day."

We both smiled.

Half an hour later we were stuffed.

"Oh my god, I'm gonna throw up," Jesse said and I laughed.

"Me too. But it was delicious, thank you."

"You're very welcome. But that was just the beginning."

"More food? I don't think it's anatomically possible to get any more into me, probably not for a couple of days."

"No, next you'll get a nice, long massage. I even got lotion. And I've picked up two movies for us to watch later, they're both about fighting," he said and smiled proudly.

"Damn, I'm starting to feel guilty. But it'll be my turn to pamper you tomorrow."

"No way, you already are a great boyfriend and this is just my way of thanking you."

"You really don't have to do this, trust me, I'm the lucky one here."

"No, you're not. But hush now. Let's go to our room."

He took me by the hand and lead me to our room.

"Take off your shirt."

I did and his eyes widened, his mouth opened a little and he just stared at me for a few seconds.

"Are you alright?" I asked, grinning.

"What? Yeah... I mean, holy shit!"

"Should I put my shirt back on?" I asked jokingly.

"Don't you dare. Just give me a second."

"You act like you've never seen a fit body before."

"Not for real. And you're my boyfriend, I'll get to touch this, I just need some time to wrap my head around that. You could be on the cover of a magazine, you know?"

"You're adorable."

He just ignored me.

"May I?" he asked.

"Of course."

He came closer and gently put his hand on my chest. He seemed mesmerized while he carefully stroked, poked and squeezed my upper body and my arms. After he had studied me sufficiently, he shook his head a little and then looked at me sharply, as if he had just woken up and realized where he was. I had to laugh.

"Sorry," he said sheepishly.

"It's alright, you can do that any time you want."

"Don't tempt me, you devil, I feel like I've just been drugged or something."

"That's very flattering... I guess."

"Lie down, quickly, before I get sucked in again."

I did. He disappeared and came back a couple of seconds later with a bottle of lotion in his hand.

"Just wait, in a minute you'll be so relaxed you're gonna shit yourself."

I burst out laughing.

"You're the 'cutest' person I've ever met."

"Thank you," he said, giggling, and then started massaging me.

"How's that?" he asked after a minute or 2.


It wasn't completely truthful, it was fine what he did, but I had gotten a lot of massages over the years, so his attempt just felt a little clumsy compared to a professional. I appreciated the gesture though and loved being touched by him.

After about 30 minutes he climbed off of me.

"And, are you crazy relaxed now or what?" he asked and I got up.

"Very much so, thanks again. Now it's your turn."

"What? No."

"I insist."

"Come on, today's about making you feel good, not me."

"But I really wanna do this. Now take off your shirt."

He sighed, hesitantly took off his shirt and then looked at me shyly.

"Are you very disappointed?" he asked sadly.

"I think you look incredible."

"No, I don't. Compared to you I'm a joke, it's embarrassing."

"Listen, muscular doesn't mean better, it's just a different look. I wouldn't change a thing about you. You're perfect the way you are and you don't even have to put any effort into it, that's special."

I stepped closer, stroked his chest with the back of my finger and smiled at him.

"I'm not special, you're just being sweet."

"You are to me, cross my heart and hope to die."

"Ok... you have really bad taste then," he said, grinning.

"No, I have exceptional taste."


"Come on, lie down, I'll make you shit yourself."

He did and I got on top of him, spread some lotion on his back and when I started to massage him he moaned happily.

"Oh my god, how the hell are you doing this?" he asked.

"Oh yeah, by the way, I'm awesome at giving massages."

"That's an understatement. I mean, I might cum."

"Just wait what I can do with my mouth."

Jesse giggled.

"No way, you're not that good with your mouth too, are you?"

"No, that was a joke. I think I'm actually pretty bad at blowjobs."

"Thank god."

I laughed.

"What? Why?"

"Well, cause you're making me feel kind of inadequate, so I'm glad there's at least one thing I'm better at than you."

"You're better than me in a lot of ways."

"Not where it counts."

"That's bullshit. We really have to work on your attitude. Cause as far as I'm concerned your self-confidence is the only area where you're slightly flawed. I guess I'll just have to constantly remind you that I'm crazy about you."

"You're amazing."

"Not as amazing as you."

"Stop that," he said and giggled.

I kept massaging him for another 20 minutes.

"That was unreal, thank you so much," he said.

"My pleasure. You can go take a shower first if you want."

"Or, we could take a shower together," he said, looked at me sheepishly and blushed.

"What about taking it slowly and 'saving' ourselves?"

"Well, what if we just don't touch each other, you know, down there?"

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah, you?"

"Hell yes," I said, smiled at him, and he smirked back at me.

We grabbed fresh clothes and went to the bathroom. I laid down a towel in front of the shower while Jesse was watching me expectantly.

"You want me to go first?" I asked and he nodded, so I opened my pants and pulled them and my briefs down at the same time. His eyebrows went up and he grinned.

"And, will it suffice?" I asked.

"Oh yeah, it'll do."

"Now let's see what you got."

He hesitantly pulled down his pants and briefs and looked at me shyly.

"You were right, it is very beautiful," I said and he smiled.

"Let's get in."

We got into the shower and I turned on the water. He handed me the shower gel and I started to lather him, just his upper body, arms and back though. After I had washed his hair with shampoo he started on me, but he insisted not to use any products or I wouldn't smell like me anymore, so he just gently rubbed me down. When we were clean we dried ourselves off and got dressed.

"That was really exciting. Did you like it too?" he asked.

"You bet. Best shower of my life."

He giggled.

"Hey, do you wanna make out for a while?"

"Boy, do I ever."

We went to the living room and sat down. Jesse laid his legs over my lap, put his arms around my neck and slowly leaned in. After a few seconds I felt his tongue softly brushing up again my lips, so I opened my mouth. Our tongues met and caressed each other carefully. His taste was intoxicating. When he broke the kiss 5 minutes later we both smiled.

"Wow," Jesse said.

"You can say that again."

We kept making out for about an hour and then decided to take a break. We lay down together and I was holding Jesse in my arms and was stroking his palm with my finger.

"I'm so happy right now," he said.

"Me too. I can't wait for our three day anniversary."

"Do you think it'll always be this amazing?"


He frowned.

"You don't?"

"No, I think we're just getting warmed up."

We both smiled.