You might not be a vampire. But what about your friends? Your family? Someone you know is a vampire, and could even now be desperate for knowledge to hone, control, and ultimately cure the condition. Where can they turn to for advice? Too many of my friends have stories that are frighteningly similar to my own. Perhaps sharing my story will help. Follow along my journey, learning as I did. This is my struggle to master Psychic Vampirism, instead of allowing it to master myself.
It was a natural thing for me, that moment when I realized I was a vampire. I had already been living and practicing as an energy vampire for years before I put a name to what I was. It felt comfortable and normal for me to be called vampire more than any other label I had been granted by the mundane humans around me. Being different, the fledgling state of my childhood was too predictable to need repeating. It was worse than some and better than most. Those stories are common enough. This story, however, is magic. This is the book I needed then. Perhaps it is the book you need now.
By the age of 11, I became aware that other children did not feel the energy I felt from all things. There was life in everything, even lifeless stones and silverware. No matter how common or precious, everything held a vibration. I felt worlds inside a crystal, experienced the wind in my branches if I touched a tree, and glimpsed other realms of vast space inside meteorites. My father taught me about psychometry and awakened my mind to the wonder of the metaphysical point of view. I explored the physical and invisible world with hands, eyes, and an open mind.
Magic is wonder and horror in equal measure. I opened my psychic senses for the first time in a wild and dangerous cauldron of energetic interactions. In a large city, in a large family, where could my budding senses find any peace? I was drawn to plants and trees, fascinated by the way they spoke when I touched them. Touch was only the first sense to blossom. I found new reasons to fear the dark as my sight developed. I started seeing things. Spirits, entities, aliens, I didn't know. To me, they looked like small animals that shone with inner light. These gathered and followed me. They whispered and played with me. My invisible friends rapidly out numbered my physical friends. As for the other side of that coin, who would not recoil in fear at such a thing? I knew the world defined life in distinct groups of predator and prey. Light and dark. As a child vampire, a baby dragon, I was prey. A small lion cub can be killed by a gazelle and eaten by jackals. Bones bleached in the sun remember both life and death. The valley I lived in, a dry dessert blasted by summer heat, remembered a time in the ancient past as the shadowy floor of an oppressive sea.
On rainy days I saw them, dim and lurking hulks of voracious undersea creatures floating over the city. They swam lazily, vast mouths filled with teeth, reaching down with tentacles and cords and horns and hunger. I felt those cords, long and dangling like the many arms of a jelly fish, draining life force from the humans in the city below as the rain fed the earth. These behemoths without name, neither fully dead nor alive, sustained themselves on the ethereal soup that millions of mortals produced. They harvested energy like a farmer milked the cows. They were also immortal. Were they demons or gods? Undying, unthinking sea monsters? I only felt they were undefined, unknowable, and to attempt to know them courted madness. When I dared feel them, the horrid creature touched me. I felt the tendrils ooze along the perimeter of my aura, and I went still and quiet like a mouse hiding from a tiger.
I had no shields or allies yet to protect me from the nightmares that followed. I saw clearly every dark and evil thing from the tiniest of black orbs to the biting imps that haunt malls and hospitals, to the largest of things floating in the sky. They sucked hungrily at my life source, my energy. The hunters lurked in shadow, in my closet, even under the bed. They constantly stole from me, sometimes leaving me still exhausted in the morning. The black dreams were not easy to sleep through, and terror made me wake with a pounding heart. My family tells me I had a problem with sleep walking and talking. This was no good way to spend a childhood, but it was the perfect way to forge a psychic warrior.
Those who are not afraid of the dark are higher up on the food chain than a young, unshielded psychic sensitive. I had so many things to fear, and so few I could share my fears with. My father proudly stepped into the role of mentor, surprising me greatly. I had not realized my gift was hereditary, and he had spent years waiting for one of his daughters to ask about it. He pointed me towards the old, cloth covered books in the family library with the pages yellowed with age, and passed down wisdom verbally that few humans possessed. I was absolutely convinced that immortality of the soul in this world was not only possible,but proven by the primordial vampires. Those old books became my light, and every now and then he bought me a new one to add to my collection. I remember him paging through each book carefully before he purchased them, but who knows what he was looking for?
I started fighting back by placing salt at the window, door, and all around my bed. This classic protection ritual involved a cup, some water, a pinch of salt, and some talent at sneaking. I blessed the entire house, each window, and each door, and every bed without being caught by the rest of the family. An upright pentagram drawn in salt water on the glass outside and inside engaged the house's newest shield. I felt that power cover the house like a soap bubble inside my Father's orange shield. Blue water, with white shimmers floating in it, surrounding the house. I extended it under and over the house for a full globe of protective energy and tethered it lightly to a large crystal from my rock collection. Not bad for a first try.
Every little bit helped, but I wasn't after little. I wanted protection in a big way, so that salt shield was only the first of many layers on my complex protections built over years. That weave of layers would be made over every house I lived in, until a bubble of light became a matrix of woven threads like a welcoming nest of peace and quiet.
At first I used small stones for wards, but when my parents noticed how fascinated I was with stones and crystals they started to buy larger ones for me. A rock collection is a great excuse for building a store of minerals useful in stone magic. This collection formed the base of my defensive measures, along a large book about the properties of stones. I'd warded the house. Now I needed to ward my dreams.
What stones should I use? In what configuration? How could I make a dream shield over my bed to keep things from influencing me as I slept? I thought about this for days until I created the design that now, in larger scale, surrounds my entire home. In a small wooden bowl I placed two cups of clean beach sand, because the ocean to me represented my subconscious mind. I buried clear crystals in the sand to power it, all pointed toward the center and focused on a small lapis lazuli pyramid. This I blessed with salt water and placed under my bed. As it charged, a dome of blue light formed around my bed to promote sleep and well being. I added an amethyst and rose quartz. That worked so well I made a portable shield to wear to school. If I'd known about resin casting magical pendants that would have made things easier. Instead, I wrapped a blessed crystal in copper wire and carried a bag filled with talismanic powder. The cotton bag of powder, one part sand, one part sulfur, and one part salt, may not be glamorous, but the difference I felt was incredible. It was worth pounding a sulfur crystal to powder and carrying a slight smell of brimstone in my pocket. My energy rose, my mood lightened, and I felt safer. The physical focus for my psychic shield gave me a tremendous boost of power. Instead of a soap bubble, it was more like jelly, and didn't fall apart under attack.
I worked on shields and talismans for nearly a year. Every morning, every night, and several times a day, I reset, rebuilt, and maintained my shield. I researched shield meditations through trial and error. Books helped, but some of the best shield tutorials came from fantasy novels that father made certain I read. He handed me book after book with hidden gems in them until my protections were as perfect as I could make them.
On my twelfth birthday I suddenly realized I'd been hiding from the astral plane like a turtle in a shell for several months. Protection is fine, but a whole universe existed beyond my bubble and I was deliberately blocking it out. I was ready to see more, but I did not want to be alone when I dropped my shield. I had no friends. Just as a person who runs often needs more food, constant psychic exercise spread a hunger through my being. I needed, in fact thirsted, for energy deep in my center. I hungered so violently that it caused my hands to shake. I felt it in my veins, until small vines extended from me in imitation of those horrors, and wrapped around any convenient target. I grasped clumsily, using my crude tentacles to force energy from my victim and into myself. It was inefficient and inelegant. I chose my donors from people I had no love for, mostly other children at school. In my mind they deserved no less. I hated touching the other children because they disgusted me. They were prey. I knew martial arts and self defense but I never used it. I bore the teasing, pokes, bruises, and even permanent scars. In return I took their energy as payment. What I took was only what they owed me for the senseless bullying.
I took so often I began to notice the tastes of each one's energy. Some where better than others, but I had the non-discerning palette of childhood. Energy was energy. It all filled me with a sense of bubbling euphoria and powered my shields, as well as expanded my narrow view into the astral realm. More energy gave me more control. I blossomed into a powerful being in my dreams, and nightmares were a trouble of the past. I didn't become a picky eater until much later, but I am looking at a scar on my arm as I write this, and I can't find regret in my heart. I paid for that energy in blood by refusing to physically defend myself, though I could have done so. The thought of striking a person in anger is alien to me. I wish normal children felt the same way. There I was, just twelve, suffering from a horrific induction into the twilight realm at far too tender an age, dealing with petty bullies, monsters, and vampiric hunger. It was too much for any child, and I can only imagine the potential mentors that could have helped me so would have laughed at me for needing to learn the finer points of being a vampire. I wasn't of age. A hint, a clue, and a pat of the head to go away and be a good girl was the best I could expect.
I began to study spirituality. I compared philosophies and learned about magic, paganism, yoga, anything that might help define my experience. I found dream walking, astral projection, and energy healing. Many hours were spent in the library searching for answers that were just the first step of long road to self mastery. Practice improved my feeding method, allowing me to replace thick tentacles with graceful, golden tendrils. I reached towards my prey daintily and merely brushed the tips across their auras, pulling in energy with each breath. Dainty feeding led to finicky tastes. My tormentors were sour and polluted; small minds with low energy fields. There were better targets that bubbled with life and joy. I could take less and gain more from my targets if I chose carefully, so I joined choir at church. Public performance allowed the energy of watching humans to pour down upon me like sun shining on forest, freely given and easy to absorb.
I felt somewhat guilty, feeding from those who had not harmed me first, before I discovered that energy transfer went both ways. Performance, song, poetry, art, all of that became little ways that I paid for my feeding. Vampires are generally talented people. We lap up praise and admiration, luring our donors close with myriad glamors. I started with song, poetry writing, then learned dance, and the penny whistle, sewing, crafts and arts of all kinds. My father also had talents ranging from metal work to computer programming, and still people marveled at his paintings. My sisters are all similarly blessed, gifted in things from sword fighting to embroidery. Glamor is all about doing things that lead potential donors to send energy toward the Vampire. It is up to the Vampire to learn to absorb it correctly. Vampires are attention seekers for that reason. Like birds with fancy plumage, they often dress one or two levels above the dress code of a club or event. If you know a person who claims to be a Vampire but also claims not to enjoy attention, look closely at how they are dressed. You might find them standing out in a crowd without meaning to do so. The instinct to glamor is and feed is powerful. There are many who do this without knowing they are doing such a thing. I blossomed into a driven young woman who practiced many arts, crafts, and music. I joined a writing group and started my first novel at age 13, when I determined that one day I would be a published author. I knew the lure of prey would be a standard chore for the rest of my life and decided that a little fame couldn't hurt.
Today I am loved by my admirers, and I love them. Age certainly expanded and mellowed my energetic field, so I rarely need to absorb energy. Now my glamor and performances are done for the enjoyment of myself and my audience, but this story is about my time as a very hungry fledgling. Glamor is hard work. It is the talent and means by which a vampire gains attention. I didn't get on stage by standing around picking my nose. At age twelve I picked up my first penny whistle and learned a few songs. Shortly after that, I was invited to perform at a dinner meeting for a club of historians. They found me adorable. Many people use glamor for everything from performance to cosplay. The vampire clings to glamor for survival.
One kind of glamor is destructive. Like a child throwing a tantrum, the vampire makes a scene to attract anger or sympathy. Screaming, hurting people's feelings, and acting out are all ways to make people focus attention and energy on yourself. The result is the continued cycle of stunted chakra growth and alienation of friends and family.
Constructive glamor involves arts, skills, attractive dress, and cultivating the mind. The vampire uses every opportunity to learn things that are praiseworthy and uplifting. Constructive glamor is not uses only for feeding, but also to build a balanced core of friends. The damaged template of the vampire's energy field then mimics the healthy templates of his or her friends and begins to heal, using the healthy auras to learn how to pull energy from non-human sources. The irony is that in order to truly mature, the vampire needs an entire community of support. This is why loneliness is another classic symptom the young vampire suffers. They know they crave friends and companions. The trouble is, lack of control over feeding behavior drives friends away. All friends who stay through thick and thin are highly valued, gaining the vampire's true loyalty for life.
What kind of family raises a Vampire? You might guess I was raised in a purely pagan household, where my father encouraged my use of crystals and ritual magic, but that was only half the story. My parents were also church goers. Every Sunday, with extra meetings for choir and Bible school, I learned about Jesus and God and all sorts of things. I became ever more fervent in prayer, even as I turned to esoteric works and foreign philosophies. I cried and shook as I prayed for strength to endure the increasingly dark night of my soul. I spent much time in prayer and meditations, astral body control, and psychic development. My faith ran deep and sure until grain by grain my faith washed away. I felt a vast emptiness in my heart. I know what you are thinking. What kind of thirteen year old has a religious crisis of belief? I became a seeker of truth. It crashed down on me, how little I knew, how little power I held. I began to explore in earnest. At the same time, I threw myself into being the best little church girl I could be. If I failed in the church, it would not be for lack of trying. I thought perhaps that my lack of faith was an internal problem. I obeyed all the rules, studied the Holy Books, and prayed several times a day so that in the end I could say I gave religion my best shot. I kept myself pure in body, speech, and mind, refusing all illicit drugs and activities. I did not want excuses. That is to say, I didn't want to be able to blame my failure to be a Christian on substance abuse or sex. I sought only the truth, and forged my path with sober determination. My purpose is not to sway anyone's belief, I only wish to explain my circumstance. I do not hesitate now to say that every religion has truth in it, and every religion can help a human through hard times. My experience may not be yours.
By age thirteen I'd had enough of school yard bullies to do something about it. Perhaps manipulation is a bad thing, but so was the need to walk a mile out of my way every day to avoid physical harm. I dare not take the bus. They knew my stop. Sometimes they missed me because they tired of waiting for my path to carry me to the ambush site. Sometimes I varied my route even further, going behind bushes along a path instead of using the sidewalk, or ducking down an alley rather than using the front street. I hid, or out ran them, and twice a month they caught me. The problem with my legs that has plagued much of my life began around that time. I remember my muscles twitching and spasming for up to twenty minutes after I sat down from the walk home. The walk I should have had a bus for. I used my budding allure, my glamor, to make some large, dangerous friends. Growing girls on the wrestling team plus home made cinnamon rolls made a recipe for instant success. Then I faked an attack at the school. I rubbed Bermuda grass in my eyes to make them swell, then ran around until I was red and gasping for air, scratched up my own arms and walked into the class I shared with my new friends. I named names. I can't be sure what happened to my tormentors, but they became an annoying sort of fan club. They even came to my dance recital and cheered my name. I was off limits, dangerous, and very happy. Revenge, indeed, was sweet.
In one of my favorite fantasy novels, the main character used a ritual to summon a familiar. It seemed easy enough, involved a short ceremony, visualization, focus, and some candles. I had all that. I lit a few candles, cast a circle in salt, and cast my plea into the universe. I had written a poem that described what I wanted, what I needed, and why. I don't remember the exact words, but I asked for wisdom, strength, and friendship. I wanted a companion of the light, a protector, who wished no harm to my family or myself. The answer was immediate. I met Wisp on the night before I turned fourteen. He glowed softly blue, stood as high at the shoulder as my head, and his wolf paws were as large as dinner plates. I loved him at first sight. He spoke to me tenderly, as if I were his own cub. My new best friend, my familiar, partner until the day I die. He followed me everywhere. The weeks of preparation were nothing to me at that moment.
The ritual required several things that would be strange in a normal girl's room. First, I needed to purchase some white cloth and sew a plain robe by hand. While I worked I made sure to focus on my goal of a perfect friend. It was the opposite of fancy, being a folded piece of cloth sewn down each side, with a short belt made from braided strips of white cloth. My father bought me a new knife to use with a bowl of salt water to bless my casting circle, and a single beeswax candle. For the good smelling herbs to attract nice spirits, I used rosemary, rose petals, and mint all grown in my own garden. If I were doing this ritual today I think sweet grass and sage would be used instead. I used much thought on the qualities I needed in a familiar and wrote my plea out by hand in red ink on white paper, to be read by the light of a single candle. For the week heading up to the ceremony night I ate no sweets or meat. On the night of the full moon, I opened the blinds on my window and turned off my light. I took a special bath, brushed my teeth, and knelt barefooted on my floor. I watched the moon, that sacred pearl on the throat of the lady of night, brilliantly drowning the city in her silver wealth. The full moon makes a noise all her own so maintaining focus is vital. The waxing moon might have been easier on me. I blessed the salt, mixed salt with water, cast the circle and lit my candle, then read my poem aloud three times. I think it went something like this:
"Attend me, Guardians of the north, south, east, and west,
Guardians of the heavens and the earth,
Hear my solemn plea, and judge its worth.
Let my call reach far and near.
Let my sought companion hear.
Bring my friend in from the light,
not by force but through invite.
Protect, and love, and guide, and teach,
come now, friend, within my reach.
Let all beings come forth be of the light,
and mean no harm to myself or my family."
In very short order, I felt several beings draw near. They felt my energy and I sensed they made an agreement among themselves. All but Wisp decided to leave. Within a few years, two of the four guides who left came back to me when I was ready for their teachings.
If you try this, remember that the choice remains with the beings that are summoned. Respect them. The fact is, I wanted a mentor, teacher, and protector. That means whomever answered my call would be strong and worthy of respect. The first thing I noticed was his territoriality. He didn't tolerate any of the small predators around me. He chased off the floating black trash bag shaped things with teeth, the tiny dark orbs, and all manner of things that lurked in the dark that I shielded myself from daily. He kept the house clear of infestations. They feared him.
Wisp taught me many things, but the first was all about the duties of a familiar. I was his friend, student. Wisp could be called a professional familiar. Immortal, perhaps, I wasn't his first student. Nor would I be his last. Wisp was a good teacher for the young and foolish, such as children who perform rituals they find in fantasy novels. He was armor, training wheels, and a giant ball of pure furry love. We communicated telepathically every moment of every day for the next year. He even joined me in my dreams. He supported me unflinchingly. Together we perfected my personal shields to use less energy. He taught me to sense energy and see auras in more detail. To many animal guides, aura sight is dependent on senses other than sight. Don't be surprised if you find it easier to smell or feel auras than to see them at first. Not every guide has eagle eyes. Wolves are creatures of intuition and instinct. I learned to feel energy in my gut, reaching out with my solar plexus. With practice I drew a connection up to my third eye so that I could at last see the colors with my eyes. The link between the two centers created a focus that added color and depth to my sight. Even dreams were clearer. Many people who tell me they can't see auras learn in a matter of minutes using this method. I take no credit for it. That is a gift from my familiar.
Armed with a better way of sensing energy and a clearer aura sight, I used this to be ever more selective of my donors. At school I fed strictly from other young adults who suffered from hyperactivity. A few minutes of feeding and they relaxed, acted like people with normal energy levels, and even sat through class better. Some of my 'victims' figured it out and asked for 'treatments' from me before class. They were sweet as candy inside and out. This was the first, vital step in the journey from predator to healer. Such a positive and voluntary energy transfer raised my vibrational level until I was ready for my next familiar. Since then I have met two more of my guides, even though I never performed the summoning again. For first timers I highly recommend the ritual. Intent is nice, but the guides appreciate the effort put into a real summoning and reward those who take the time. You may be tempted to skip parts, but I warn against it. As vampire magic goes this is one of the most simplistic rituals. Shortening it any further could cause the guides to feel like you just didn't care.
Wisp was not exactly pro vampire. Being a light spirit, he did everything in his power to correct my condition. This can take many years, and the first step to the cure is all about energy efficiency. Waste less, use less, make the most out of what you already have, and feed less. Rather than waiting until I was feeling the hunger through my entire body and falling upon whomever was nearby, he taught me to plan ahead. I fed whenever conditions were right. First, I scanned the room visually, sorting targets from non-targets. I looked for others who might be like myself. It was rude to over draw a room by feeding in another's territory. Worse yet, drawing from another vampire who was older, or more experienced than myself. I did not want to be attacked. I was a child playing a grown up game, with a scary amount of power and control. I looked out for adults putting out glamor. Usually the eye-catching or well dressed dominant vampires surrounded by supporting donors were easy to avoid. I wasn't old enough to join their circles. Next, I tasted the mood of the room by sending a small tendril of my outer aura around the room. I ghosted it along the auras of people, just making sure I wasn't stepping on any toes. If I felt a pull on that tendril trying to take some of my energy, I backed off from that direction. A strong vampire might react to a probe by pulling all the energy from it into themselves, collapsing the tendril like a thin straw. This always caused a flare of power in the room that alerted me to competition. If my probe found no opposition, I pulled in a bit of energy from the crowd to see if I wanted what the humans were putting out. Generally, funerals are terrible feeding grounds and festivals are ideal. You are what you eat, after all. I liked happy, healthy, dancing teenagers best of all, so I went to every young adult dance night I could.
Energy is constantly on the move from person to person, the earth, the air, and anything you interact with. You can gain energy from a fire and leave energy on a table. As a vampire your instincts tend toward feeding whenever you feel "hungry". The best way to avoid randomly taking energy from everyone you know is to take the time to plan a good feeding. Chances are, if you aren't feeding at set times, you are a constant drain on every person around you. The low energy and inefficient draw of instinctual feeding is inferior in every way to properly fulfilling your needs.
Watch yourself for childish behavior, overly dramatic reactions to events, even surprise bouts of neediness and crying. The more annoying and pathetic you become, the more vital it is to get yourself back under control. Provoking negative feelings in people around you and soaking it in passively is not good fo anyone. Step back, take some deep breaths, ground, center, shield, and cord cut. Once you come to your senses, find a trusted friend for an energy exchange. Take a walk, go to your favorite feeding spot, or get a Reiki treatment. Reiki Masters are virtually immune to energy draining attacks and they can be very understanding.
Do a status check often. Ask yourself, "How do I feel?" Are you relaxed? Jittery, tired, angry, or depressed? Do you feel ignored, or betrayed?
Is there a reason for you feeling this way? Be honest. If there is no reason, don't try to invent one. Don't blame people in your life for your hunger pangs. Admit to yourself that you are hungry, have a good cry if you need one, and let it pass. If anyone asks, tell them you are tired, or emotional. Do not use your tears for feeding.
To prevent the empty, angry feeling of wanting to lash out in a tantrum, learn to accept your needs. It is better to relax and have a glass of wine, and let the anger go than to start a fight with your family. Eat something. Then if you still feel hungry, that is the vampire need surfacing. Food won't solve your emptiness. Underfed vampires are unhappy vampires. It might seem selfish, but taking care of yourself first prevents everyone in your life from suffering through the blame and illness spreading outward from your own discomfort. The goal is to master the impulses you were born with and tame the metaphorical beast.
Practice folding your tendrils gently away when you don't want to be using them. You will catch yourself reaching out. Just fold them back in firmly and connect to the earth until you can clear your head. Close your eyes and fold your hands together if that helps.
Just as you should watch yourself for warning signs, please watch those around you. Vampires often prey on their own kind, there is no professional courtesy. If you notice a friendship becoming a needy, dramatic, pit of despair that tries to take up all your time, pull away. Don't take it personally if they say you aren't a good friend. Don't react in a way that feeds them negative energy. This may be the hardest thing to learn. After things settle, you can approach your friend and let them know you sympathize with how they feel. You may share with them how you are handling this challenging time in your life, and perhaps work together. Use good judgment. Some people will never admit they are stealing energy and will react badly to discovery. It could be best to let the friendship drop, and move on.
Primitive feeders are not good company for active vampires. You would do better to encourage the company of givers, and seekers. Givers are those who enjoy donating energy. They are high energy, fun, physical people. Givers can't sit still for long. They love to dance and socialize. Each giver is a unique treasure that should be respected and made welcome. Seekers are those who seek mastery over psychic abilities. They may or may not be vampires, but they are intelligent practitioners of the esoteric arts. They are less physical than givers. They add inspiration and the energy of mental focus to your circle of friends.
There are three ways a vampire should practice feeding. Targeted, vortex, and web. Targeted feeding is the most basic. You pick a target, put out a few chords, and start pulling in energy. I learned to connect the cord gently, very slowly, in the outer portion of my donor's aura, never closer in over the energy centers of the body. That is not needed and can hurt your target. Allow the energy to flow as slowly as you can. A natural pace is better than lightning speed. If this exchange is voluntary, it is pleasurable for both you and the donor. When you are done, unhook your tendrils and pull away with gentleness, thankfulness, and love. Gripping too hard, hooking into the aura too deeply, or siphoning too fast will damage your donor's aura, leaving holes and scars that, at worst, are permanent. Some damage heals on it's own depending on the person, and that is why the health and energy state of your donor must be considered. Never do this without permission. Unless invited, this method of feeding is rude and wrong. Targeted feeding may be the most common, but it is dangerous and irresponsible to do so without guidance. Sadly, this is the method that all unacknowledged vampires use. People who do not know they are doing it cause the most damage.
Do not be a law breaker. The control required to learn these techniques is only damaged by the use of drugs, smoking, or too much coffee. Smoking is an off putting habit that will damage your health and your allure. You wouldn't want the smell on your clothes and hair giving people a bad impression of you. Drugs damage your mind and your reputation, while too much caffeine and sugar makes a sensitive person irritable. Drinking blood is a health risk and not allowed by almost every coven, conclave, and collective. Do not do it. In short, vampires should obey all local and federal laws of the land in order to avoid damaging the reputation of many by the actions of the few. Criminal behavior is beneath a true Master Vampire.
Also named the Heavenly Spin, the vortex method is very much like targeted feeding, but both partners give and receive. Energy spins clockwise from one person into another. At the same time, energy is also moving counter clockwise from one to the other. The vortex funnels in more energy from the surrounding air and the earth, which makes this a great way for two vampires to feed each other. Energy starts off slowly and then speeds up, enveloping the two or more in a cascade of light. This is always enjoyable, but again caution must be taken to connect slowly and start slowly. I find that having everyone involved extend a few tendrils from the back side of the aura like wings, then gently fold them inwards until the wing tips are tickling each other is the ideal way to begin. Always do this from a seated position.
This exercise tricks your system into absorbing universal healing energy almost directly from the source, because it has been filtered through the aura of another person. The best part is, everyone in the circle gets a huge recharge.
Sit in a circle. Have every person slowly extend gold tendrils from their backs, and from the hands. The tendrils gently overlapping on the outside of the circle as wings, send energy counter clockwise. The joined hands, send energy clockwise. Wait for the energy to build, pulling in energy from earth and sky. The healing filters through everyone, equally, and the excess is grounded when you slowly spin to a stop and fold back all the tendrils. Use gold or white tendrils only for the Heavenly Spin. You must try this with Reiki Masters and light workers, because they love it.
Web feeding is an intermediate level skill that uses the vampire's wings extensively. First, I needed to develop my wings. Too many psychics focus on the front of the body, but wing exercises ensure the back side of the aura is just as strong. Focus on your spine first. On both sides of each vertebra, a nerve bundle rests. Imagine these nerves growing golden tendrils along your ribs, until the vines pop out of your back. They grow out like wings or roots, expanding into a golden cage. This loose net can fold around to encase your entire aura or spread out behind like wings, or make a web that spreads, leaving you as the spider in the center of the web. You wings will be small at first, and grow larger with practice. Feel the breeze, the carpet, the ceiling, feel other people with your wings. At a party, for example, packets of pastel energy travel from person to person as humans interact. If you could see activity on a game website, and the energy exchanges that happen in parties, they would look very similar. I was deeply involved in hacking the system. While packets of energy float all around, some fast, slow, bright, or dull, a small fraction of this energy falls onto my web. The surface of my wings absorbs the energy and directs it into my body. With some practice I learned to shape my wings into a net that floated daintily through space, defining my sphere of influence up to thirty feet away. Drops of energy and the motion of people moving through my web sent shivers of pleasure through my physical body. Webbing a room of happy people my be difficult to learn, but very rewarding. It is important to keep the web passive. Accept the energy that falls upon it like dew upon the grass, do not pull in any energy from specific people. The net is too large for target hunting and will cause a jolting drop out of the blissful, meditative state that forming a web induces in most vampires. Do not try this technique if your ability to focus on the proper mental state is impaired.
The entire construct of the web is made of and extends from the high energy spiritual and emotional body. Immersion in this state of being calls for careful meditation and work but gives the greatest reward in terms of energy and health. I have reached this state while sitting, dancing, playing music, or even walking slowly through a garden. Passive energy transfer happens among all living beings every day. If you talk with your spouse, pet your dog, or call your mother, energy is transferred. The vampire doesn't want or need to devour all these like a starving dog. Shielding out depressing vibrations and activating higher energy perceptions are keys to enjoyable feeding. Even better, web feeding absorbs what donors have already put into the human energy exchange. Drinking this in is no more harmful to them than picking up discarded pennies or choosing a good dance partner. I fold in my net gently, retract and settle my wings and bring myself back to normal awareness as soon as the energy of the room changes or my focus is disturbed. Wisp taught me to fold my wings away like those of a bird, each strand overlapping without any tangles, until they shrank down into my back.
The ideal method of feeding is exactly like web feeding except that the vampire is using glamor to gain attention. Having gained center stage, the vampire engages glamor to attract energy. Any stage performer who has ever felt charged by the great energy of the audience has done a primitive form of this. All the energy gained is willingly sent directly toward the feeder. Skill and practice turns this almost random absorption into an organized dance of great beauty.
The wings have several other uses. Once I learned to energize them I popped them out at will to gain more space in crowds, communicate with my guides, and navigate the dream scape via flight. Flight in dreams requires attention to detail, unless you enjoy the sensation of free fall. I can't count the number of times I slammed back into my body from a terrifying fall before I mastered wings. Visualizing a set of wings doesn't make anyone a master of flight. Even baby birds practice. Attention to detail is an astral traveler's best friend. Legends are full of shape shifters who take the form of birds. Crows, bats, and hawks are common bird forms. I woke from a sound sleep, panting in fear, as if I'd fallen straight out of the sky. I am so afraid of heights that I can't sit in the top rows of a stadium without feeling sick. This does not stop me from sitting in high places, or climbing trees and enjoying lovely valleys. I could eradicate that fear if I wished, but I do not. It reminds me of my flaws. I see the fear as logical. If one has no fear of a drop, one might stray too close to the edge. Most of the people who die at the Grand Canyon every year didn't mean to fall in, they just refused to fear the fearsome. Bravery is to look into the canyon despite the fear. Wisdom reminds you not to lean over the rail.
I've wondered why my astral form is a cactus wren, out of all the forms I could take. I began watching birds on my long walks home. They have speed, caution, and amazing reflexes. Each wing sports hundreds of feathers, carefully shingled one over the other in one of nature's finest works of geometry. I learned the wings and body shape of the cactus wren. The black and white bars, the facial markings, the soft feathers and dark chocolate spots on the front of the bird, right down to the scales on her tiny claws. I studied how she flew, hunted, and sang until I truly transformed in my dreams. My jaunty tail bobbed behind me as I hopped and flared out when I flew. Never forget the tail. I know, it seems like a lot of effort just to turn into a bird. Why didn't I try something more glamorous? The cactus wren is the bird that took my fancy.
Now I'm sure you have an image in your mind of how I looked growing up. Black clothes, black hair, and goth makeup every day. A love of gloomy music and dripping in silver jewelry? You wouldn't be further from the truth. I was an adorable child with blue eyes and dimples. My pale but healthy skin was often decorated with the pink blush of youth. My blond hair shone like gold in the slightest sunlight. I favored dresses rather than pants, the more frills the better. Pale blue and yellow were my favorite colors. My hobbies included baking cookies, braiding my hair, and petting my cats. I collected shiny stickers and played with dolls. I loved glitter, pretty dresses, and unicorns. I should have been drowning in popularity. I looked normal enough, but children have a special sense for ferreting out those who are different and hating them for it. I found acceptance with my invisible friends but no mercy from the vile beasts surrounding me in school. I was lonely, and alone, and even Wisp and Share were not enough to keep one little girl from descending into a very dark place of depression and anxiety. Children aren't built to survive such unreasonable hatred for long. A born vampire without a mentor has little chance of growing up sane. Luckily, my mentor was close by When I met Share for the first time, she wore the form of a red tailed hawk. Around my fourteenth birthday, she revealed to me her divine form. Share was about 7 feet tall, with long silver blond hair. A crescent moon rode on her brow, and six gorgeous white gold wings surrounded her like a glittering cloud.
Guides rarely give their real names. When I met Share, she made it clear that her name was my new motto. I had to learn to share. Vampires can be jealous and hoarding types, more so if they don't work to correct the bad habits of youth. Share first taught me how to ground, center, and shield more effectively. My guides stress the importance of the basics, if you think a skill is mastered that is the ideal time to go learn it again. I suggest reading up on the basics once a year, through different authors and points of view if you can. Here is one method of grounding, centering, and shielding that should be done at least once a week. Use this or find another method that works for you. Don't be too rigid to try many different styles.
Here I describe some of my favorite methods of grounding. The technique that works best for each person is based on a variety of factors, including personality, elemental affinity, and spiritual belief. What really matters is results. If you reach the correct state of mind and a feeling of peace in your energy, this is the measure of success.
The most common technique for grounding is called "the Tree of Life." You should stand or sit in one place, with the soles of your feet touching the ground. Close your eyes and imagine your feet as the roots of a tree, spreading deep into the soil beneath you. Breathe in. As you do, visualize clean, pure water feeding your roods and filling your body, washing all the unbalanced energy down toward your feet. As this energy reaches your feet, imagine it being pushed out, through your roots, into the ground, where it is dispersed by the minerals of the Earth. Up from your shoulders sprout thick branches with leaves, spreading into the sky above you. The cleansing light of the powerful sun filters down through your body and mixes with the water in your center, balancing energy from above and below. After some time, pull your roots up and your branches back into your body. Gently release the connection from the earth and sky, but keep the sense of balance and peace.
I often use a technique known as "Washing Away." For water and air element types, this is the easiest method. It can require less time and visualization than the other, or you can take your time with this flexible grounding method.
"Washing Away" works best done in a shower, though it can be performed in a bathtub.
While you are in the shower, soaping up, visualize the soap pulling not just the normal dirt and oils from your body, but also the all excessive energy (both negative and positive), from deep inside, up through your pores, leaving your energy levels balanced. Imagine the soap on your skin absorbing the excess energy. Then step under the water, and see that energy wash away along with the soap. Feel the chaos clear away as the water carries it down the drain.
For fire and earth element types, there is also flame grounding. In this technique, you sit before a candle or other flame source, such as a lit fireplace. Stare into the flames, allowing your vision to go soft and blurry at the edges. As you stare into the flames, focus all your tension, fear, anger or excessive energy into the flame, visualizing them being burned away in the heat of the fire.
Once you complete grounding, sit in a comfortable position for the next step, Centering.
If you chose the "Tree of Life" grounding method, you already centered when you reached out to Above and Below and mixed the energy of the sun and water in the core of your body. Many grounding techniques lead to being centered as a natural progression because that is how energy moves. You ground with intent, then centering is automatic because you are at peace.
When I need to center beyond the natural feeling of control and peace after grounding, I visualize a ball of light descending to the top of my head. I focus on my brow chakra and intone, "om". The ball moves down to my throat and changes to blue, I intone, "ah". The light travels to my heart and turns green, with a pink center, and I intone, "hum". Repeat the action three times.
For the most simple shield, see the light and sound from "om, ah, hum," expand and meld into a filmy egg shaped barrier around your body. This is the shielding boundary, so it should be set so that it stretches to protect you when your arms are fully extended, and from a hand's width beneath the soles of your feet to a hand's width above the crown of your head, when standing upright. If you find this constricting, visualize the barrier starting about two feet above your head and two feet below the ground.
Draw energy, usually blue with silver sparkles, down through your head and into the barrier, filling up the space like a starry twilight sky, driving away any remaining unbalanced thoughts or emotions, until the energy reaches the barrier you already established. This energy is your shield, made to keep negative energies from the world out. It protects you, but make sure it is also permeable for balanced and healing energies.
As a vampire, shielding without cord cutting first is like putting your diamonds in a safe, but never locking it. We use our cords to form attachments with people that are energetic in nature, and therefore invisible to the naked eye. These cords are a two way street, and you don't want to let these cords go unchecked. Your behavior may be influenced or controlled by the person you are corded to. You may be manipulated, depressed, stuck, suffer from low energy levels or simply feel awkward. Energetic cords are not restricted by distance or time, so you could be affected by a connection with a person who is far away, someone from years ago, or a person who has passed away. Regardless of whether or not it is a healthy loving connection or a draining connection, it is important to cleanse the energy field of all types of cords at least once a month. Those you love and welcome will regrow with no trouble.
1) Ground and center, then relax in a safe place. It may help to have soft music playing, and to smudge the room with burning sage. Your cord-cutting ritual may be as short or elaborate as you like. Leave a door or window partially open to allow energies to depart.
2) Picture your clean, vibrant energy field in an egg shape around you, paying note to the surface of the blue or white aura template where cords connect to you. You can feel or see them. Some may attach at ankle level, others straight into the heart or head. Take note of the size, color, thickness or substance that make up the many cords you will find. Are they delicate or tough? Gold, white, or brown, or any other colors?
3) Identifying what the cord looks like will offer information about the type of connection that exists between you and other people. Energetic cords can appear like an umbilical cord, or even a rope with a grappling hook at the end. Is the cord glowing, or dark and sticky?
4) Hold your hands about a foot apart in front of your heart or solar plexus and form a ball of your own personal energy. Pat it down and give it a sticky, or magnetic feeling. The smaller cords should start moving from yourself to the ball.
5) For the stubborn cords, I visualize one of my guides coming down with a flaming sword and severing each from my form. I take care not to pull, tear, or rip out connections by the root. The roots or hooks will naturally absorb into your own energy. The detached cords then fly up to the ball of sticky energy and begin feeding from it. You can imagine using a knife and cutting the cords yourself if you prefer.
6) Now in gentle respect and love, hand the ball and all the cords over to your guide. The key to the success of the separation will be in tricking people on the other end of the cords into thinking they are still attached to you. Then you can ask your familiar or guide to take the ball into the universal energy field where all the attachments will continually feed on healing energy and love for a few days until the sticky ball fades away with all the cords. You can hand the ball to an angel, stick it into a lit forge, or just picture it floating away into the core of the earth.
7) It is not uncommon that shortly after an energetic cord-cutting experience and separation that the person on the other end senses a sudden feeling of "loss" and may reach out to you. You may get a phone call, text message, or even see this person. The sticky ball trick will minimize the potential for a reconnection, because by the time the sticky capture ball disintegrates the reason for the cord's existence may be healed.
8) Every spot that once held a cord leaves a scar in the aura that needs to be sealed. There are several ways to do this. Your guide can come back and seal over each nick with loving touch and white light, for example. Go through the centering exercise of light coming down and intoning "Om, Ah, Hum" and finally completing the shield exercise will leave you feeling light as a feather, possibly dizzy. You may wish to sit quietly for a few minutes.
Bad dreams go hand in hand with being a young psychic sensitive. We see too much during the day to process it all, and our minds run away with it in our sleep. With Share's techniques, my energy began to stabilize. It was a long way from a mature aura and a steady mind, but I was firmly on my way. I was fairly advanced in protection constructs. My house was under one shield while my room was under another shield within the first. Each of these was powered by generator crystals that were placed strategically through the house, thanks to my growing rock collection. I used salt water blessings on every door and window. Around my bed I placed a third layer of shields powered by a lapis lazuli pyramid and a cluster of crystal points that I harvested from a mine by my own hand. Every night I used focused meditation to prepare myself to control and direct any bad dreams that were able to penetrate the shields. This nightly ritual and prayer, perfected over many times repetition, allowed me to fall to sleep without fear. I could go weeks between bad dreams. If one started, I could redirect the dream back to a harmless meadow of flowers. I practiced how to stop the dream by force, turn into a bird and fly away, or destroy the monsters with my bare hands. I became a deity in my dream world. Most incidents no longer disturbed my rest. I could summon weapons, fly, use force, sleep through chase scenes that would make movie directors green with envy, and turn alligators into ponies. I am still in control today, but I have dispensed with the elaborate nightly ritual after my guides advised me that I was beyond the need for such things. A quick check of my grounding and shield and I'm off to sleep.
The amount of control you have over your own dreams is directly related to three things. Self awareness, preparation, and focus. Self awareness is natural once you study my basic technique. You know how to feel the world with your tendrils. Extend that awareness to your hands and feet. Once you are aware of your body, you are in control of the dream. You can stop attackers or leave the area of conflict. Imagination can make bad dreams into good entertainment. Are monsters chasing you? Set them on fire with a wave of your hand. If you find a gun, turn it into a party cannon. If you need to leave, grow wings to fly away.
While awake, prepare. Use your mind to create defense and offense. Make a safe place to relax in your mind, a meadow filled with butterflies and unicorns, or a peaceful stream hidden where only you can find it. Imagine you are a wizard or fighter of great talent. Spend some time on this, make weapons and robes, armor and a magic staff, and give yourself amazing powers. I can transform into my prepared avatar in the blink of an eye, changing from my normal harmless self into a confident warrior.
Focus on your protections. Bring them to mind as you fall asleep. Let the last thing you see in your mind before you drift off be your place of safety and power. You are comfortable in a shady meadow, but your altar ego the flame throwing wizard is only a thought away. You can feel the worn and polished wood of your magical staff mere inches from your fingertips, ready to be called into your hand at the first sign of trouble. Perhaps you will spend all night in the meadow. If a bad dream strikes you are ready to beat it down. Be calm and confident as you fall asleep, letting go the worries of the day.
The key is to listen, not just to what your guides said in the past, but to how the advice might change as you advance in your studies and abilities. Around the time of my 18th birthday, Share came forward with a very clear message. "Beloved, you are stronger than you once were. This constant shielding is beneath you and a waste of your time. You dream walk without even thinking about it. Don't check your protection every night. Do not pray for sweet dreams. The only way to improve control now is to start letting things through. Feel things again. Then you can choose to block what harms you without cutting yourself off from the entire world."
I went from focusing on my defense twice a day to only twice a week, and allowed the bubble to thin enough so that I could feel subtle vibrations when I wasn't actively absorbing energy. It was invigorating. A layer of awareness that I'd been blocking for years came back slowly, overwhelming me with the surprising pleasure of it. I heard trees whisper and felt astral thought forms that surrounded all life. Freedom from shields gave me the sweetest discovery yet. Age and maturity, as well as practice with my tendrils, developed my heart and throat chakra so the astral world I saw was on a higher frequency than the one I saw as a child. Many light workers will tell you that an untrained vampire's chakras spin listlessly backwards, causing a fog in the brain, difficulty making decisions, weakness to physical cravings such as food and lust. A person with still or backwards motion can mainly see the evil, the harmful, and frightening things reflecting back at them from the beyond. My energy reversed polarity, and everything changed.
Instead of nightmares, I saw beauty all around me. My heart opened to the natural world where I made friends. Flowers spoke to me, rocks comforted and embraced me. Bees would land on my fingers and lick sugar water from my skin. I spent hours just feeling the grass grow, reaching towards the sky, being green. I pressed against trees to feel the wind in my branches and my roots in the soil. I stood in the rain and celebrated the drops of water cleansing my aura, grounding and washing me. Share led me in this until I could sense and absorb energy from things in my environment. After some effort I could feed from grass, trees, and clouds but I still craved human energy. It seemed more freely available to me than any other type. Nature energy filtered around my system before fully absorbing and had some side effects. Trees were soothing, fire raised my temperature, and too much wind made me giddy. Human energy is a rush followed by pleasure and warmth, but I did not just take any energy that was flying around. I learned to filter what energy I took in with great care.
In a safe park or stretch of grass and trees, practice walking slowly with your eyes closed. Spread out your net, or wings, to sense the trees and bushes so you do not run into things. Use sound and energy and clues such as smell to guide you. Do you smell roses? Don't step into the rose bush. The point of the blind exercise is to enhance the vampire sense to the next level. Using the filter, I could submerge my senses in a sea of people without activating the feeding net. I knew on an instinctive level who was happy, sad, or sick, who had a lot of energy and who to avoid. I could spread my net around a room and only absorb free floating positive energy, refusing depression, fear, and anger. I think of it as watching sand fall in an hourglass and picking out the brightest bits of sand for myself to keep, grain by grain, an allowing only these bits to flow back to me on the net.
Share called the unfiltered energy stream I used to accept, "A vile refuse pit that did nothing to enhance my talents at energy manipulation" and did her best to refine my palate to a more "caviar and truffle" level. "Garbage in, garbage out" is a universal truth. I felt lighter. Happier. Filtering has the side effect of moving my entire system up on the vibrational evolutionary scale that every Vampire must climb. I suffered less depression and gained more energy from nature. It was easier to turn aside thoughts of hurting myself. Pure joy flooded my whole body at random times during the day or night. I bubbled with laughter, danced, sang, and listened to the joyous world around me. If you reach this stage, you may want to take the next step and become a healer that can give energy instead of taking it.
I met the woman who would become my Reiki Master Teacher at a Unity Church. She was vibrantly alive, yet calm, a huge aura in a small body. She fascinated me, and her unique energy could not be ignored. Healing by laying on hands is practiced by gifted persons all over this world, but many experience sickness after using this gift. A master Vampire need not fear taking on symptoms of non-communicable illness from people they are healing because shielding and filtering has become second nature. A few safety measures go a long way. If you are ever urged by your familiars to refuse healing to a potential patient, refer that person to an experienced professional.
First, it is possible to do almost all energy work without actually touching the patient. Since the human field is so large, physical touching is not required. Keep hands about two to six inches away from the subject at all times. After, always wash hands and run some water over the back of your neck to close the energetic gates. If you do plan to learn any psychic healing, please consider a Reiki Mastery and become certified in counseling or massage therapy through a reputable school.
I mention healing here because there are times that light workers exhibit vampiric feeding behavior. If a person becomes tired, sick, or drained of energy, their normally strong chakras can reverse spin. They sprout dark blue tentacles that wrap around the closest person and take energy. Neither the healer nor the victim are aware of this most of the time. Psychologists, angel channelers and even massage therapists can suffer from this problem. The difference is in how they solve it. Healers should have fully developed auras and only feed human to human when they are exhausted and running on instinct. They do not need human energy. Instead of webbing a crowd, there are several appropriate ways for a healer to recharge.
Sky energy. Send an energy web to collect universal healing energy from the sky. Light from the sun, moon, and stars is sky energy, as is lightning, storm, and cloud energy. All of this is very refreshing.
Nature energy. Send your web into the grass, trees, and flowers to collect the life bounty of the plants around you.
Divine energy. While visualizing your spiritual guide, angel connection, or Deity, send healing energy directly towards them. If you are near a sacred shrine such as a temple or grove, send energy to the sacred site and objects. You will feel the flow come back to you greater than what you sent out, filling and recharging every part of your aura.
Psychologists define a disorder or disease as a condition that harms the person who has it, or causes them to harm others. It can also be defined as a condition that the person who has it, wishes they did not have. This means that psychic vampirism can be classified as a disease or disorder much the same as obsessive compulsive disorder or alcohol addiction. The problem, as I've covered, starts in childhood. Some physical or mental trauma damages the roots of the child's under developed chakra system. As the centers mature, they need more energy. They try and fail to connect to the universal energy field. Then they turn to nurturers. Parents. They draw "predigested" energy because it is more accessible to their stunted roots. Children are supposed to do this. Adult vampires were never able to transition away from human to universal energy. If they stop drawing they feel always hungry, deep inside like starvation. They become sick and weak. Telling them to stop isn't a cure. Growing those roots requires careful training and practice. They need love, knowledge, and guidance in order to turn a disadvantage into a new life.
I practiced for ten years all the mental and energy techniques that I felt fit my needs. By the time I was 21, I was finally in control of the energy flows instead of them controlling me. I never feed on random victims when I am low, I don't accept lesser vampires in my life, and I continued to focus on my ability to heal myself and those around me.
I did not instantly become a saint, or learn to walk on water. Human existence is a work in progress. I learned to feel the subtle signals of the universe to manifest things in the physical plane. This can seem like good fortune. For example, a sudden urge to visit the second hand store could lead to a find of expensive pearls. A walk along a riverbed reveals a carved stone of powerful significance. Life became a magical journey of discovery and awareness instead of a dark well of misery. This is mastery, the state of being in balance and command of yourself and your life. Mastery has many levels, and is never complete. It is, I've come to understand, the new "Level Zero" of the journey to your next Mastery.
It is a mistake to think we all live in one world together and experience the same things. The universe is made from vibrations. Like switching the radio frequency changes the music you hear, changing your spiritual character will change the level of the world you perceive, and the level of beings that perceive you. I started as a child, full of fear, only able to see beings of hate and darkness. Advancing my studies, changing my energy, changed my psychic surroundings into sacred space. A Vampire who wishes to ascend to a cohesive spiritual form of eternal existence must be a true master, capable of filtering the energy of an entire room, feeding, and leaving everyone more energized instead of tired and depressed. The true goal is to reach a stage of energy manipulation where the presence of the Master Vampire is a benefit to the community instead of a drain.