(A/N) I guess this story shall prove I am in fact not racist to gingers (is that an offensive word to gingers?) Also, today I'm just feeling happy, so it definitely will shine through in this story.

I don't like fantasy. I never liked fantasy. I never will like fantasy.

I also don't like magic. I'm a 'regretful prodigy', whatever that means...

When I was approached by Jacky, the magic alicorn, I was prepared to jet. I think I got used to it when I woke up with a mara on my side, whispering nightmares into my mind and braiding my hair. I was riddled with anger as the thing that looked like a small ape with midnight black fur and beady red eyes was going through my refrigerator. He put up a fight, until about 3:00 A.M. Then he said, "I gotta go", and drove off on his horse.

It wasn't always strange. For a while, I had a normal life, normal parents, and normal siblings that would pester me to no extent. Being the youngest of four, I would always get taunted for something I had no control of. But hey, karma is also a force we can not control. I would always get my revenge when I did something bad and they got in trouble for it.

It was always Dayton, Gavin, Diana, and Jace. Oldest to youngest, respectively.

If I'm going to tell this story, I must go back to the beginning. No, we aren't going to the womb; I don't have an eidetic memory. I'm talking about when things got weird.

Ring! Ring! Ring!

My alarm went off.

Wait a second... I didn't have a standard 'Ring! Ring! Ring!' alarm. It was a radio/clock thing and I woke up to Taylor Swift's Ours blaring on my bedside table.

Oh yeah, this was 2011, when Tay-Tay was still considered a country singer. I used to live on a farm (more or less). We had chickens named Betty, Franks, Beans, Carlton III, and Caspian. Beans and Franks were twins, but I bet you could infer that...

I got up after turning down the volume a bit. I was wearing my vertically striped (too specific?) baby blue and white pajamas. I slid from my bed and into my frog slippers with fine precision and immeasurable grace. No, that was not sarcasm, believe it or not. I was feeling confident as usual.

I'm going to destroy today.

Time to go to the mirror for my daily routine of talking to myself. I stared into the mirror, my green eyes sparkling from across the divide. I didn't know why I was brushing my hair before showering, probably just so I could smile at my beautiful face [Insert smiley face here].

I was prepared for life.

I reached for the handle to the blurred glass shower door. It slid through a crevice in the wall with ease. I twisted the handle to the left, closing the door directly after.

Steam wafted around the room, the vapor moisturizing my pores. I must have turned it too far, seeing as the mirror started fogging up.

I wasn't paying attention, and stuck my hand in. It was numb for a second, and then reached it's peak of pain. Have you ever felt that something was so hot that it was cold for a split second? Yeah, I did not feel that.

If this were now, I would have just said 'Devinctionibus perfici: Frigidum facere' and shrug it off. But this was four years ago. I was fourteen, I couldn't do magic...

I ran it under cold water, the pain seeping off slowly.

I got in and ran my hands through my curly, red hair. When it comes to hair, I stand out quite a bit, but my scrawny physique doesn't help in the ferocity of my appearance. Being pale may help or denote, depending on your outlook.

I washed up and got out, my hair draped on my face.

I donned my school uniform, khakis and a red collared polo.

When I opened the door, I was greeted by the smell of bacon. I stepped from the blue and white tiles on to the long brown carpet. I moved my toes, catching the little strings between them. It felt like I was standing on an anemone. Now that I think about it, aren't anemones electric? I feel like Nemo trying to say that...

Amema? Nomemn? Emnamen? Manenimema? I don't care.

I floated toward the smell, ready to eat.

I always wake up before everybody else so I can get the food right after Mom makes it.

She made scrambled eggs, pancakes, and bacon. My favorite.

My dad, a brunet with a spray of freckles across his cheeks and nose, sat at the head of the table reading the weekly paper. It always came in the mail, since we lived in the middle of nowhere.

My mother sat across from him, her strawberry blonde locks glinting in the sunlight. I sat on the right, closest to mom.

The others started filing in, Gavin tripping over the cat's litter box like always. Soon, all the food was gone.

I heard yelling through out the house. I was instructed by my father to go and fill up the horses trough.

He was probably grazing in the field out back.

I didn't like the horses. D likes them, but only because none of the boys wanted to ride them, as they look too girly...

I nearly dropped my bucket when our Arabian was chattering in collective whinnies to a large pure Spanish stallion. I don't know which was more surprising: the fact that the stallion got over a seven foot tall fence, or it had a pointed growth on it's forehead and... wings?

I dropped the buckets, water falling on my feet.

The horse started shuffling towards me. It was about 15 meters away, so I thought, If I run, will it catch me?

First, I was an idiot. Second, why would a horse catch me? Third, why?

It broke into a gallop and spread the wings. The thing soared as I stood there froze with amazement. As the equid. It landed in front of me with a thud.

As if telepathy, I heard his voice in my head. He spoke with an English accent and it made his iridescent blue-to-green-to-purple horn glow with a bright tint.

Hello, he said the words without opening it's mouth, I am Jackson Equus Modi Corndas III. A mouthful, but you can call me Jacky.

While he chattered, I probably was staring blankly with my jaw dropped.

I know this may be a wee bit of an overload, but I have been sent by a superior power to collect you.

He waited for about thirty seconds until I began to comprehend what he was saying. "You are a... unicorn?"

The corners of his elongated mouth went slightly askew. No, he said, I am an alicorn, a powerful creature that can bend magic and flight to their will.

I was still a bit miffed from talking with a horse. "So, are you going to kidnap me? If so, I have to get my clothes." I pointed behind my back with thumb.

Oh no, his eyes got slightly more open, like he was surprised, pretty much the other way around. You're kidnapping me. Or horsenapping, but the same property. Go get your belongings. If anyone interrupts you, wave your hand and say "Devinctionibus perfici: Obliviosus intentiones".

"Wizadah wawas?"

I forgot, you can't do magic yet. It means Incantation: Oblivious intentions. It makes people unaware of what you're doing. You could leave your home and nobody would notice for a few hours, depending on your ability and the clarity of your spell.

"And that is,"

If your spell is "make good", that would not be clear. If your specific, as in "make superior", that wouldn't be confused with "make beautiful", but both of those could be confused with "make good".

"I get it but-"

He cut me off. It was okay, though, because he answered my question.

Devinctionibus perfici: Convertuntur metaphysicam libro. Cheers.

A holographic book fell out of the air. It said "English to Latin".

"A translator?"

Yes, it didn't come out how I wanted, but it still works...

The blue book defied logic. It was transparent until you opened the cover. When it was opened, the pages were written on blue paper in ultramarine ink. It had a pronunciation guide also.

If you study, you'll pick up the language.

"And if I don't?"

What happens when you don't study? You fail. If you fail, then you'll have to carry a 2 pound translation guide with you everywhere you go.

"Devinctionib perfici: Claudere os tuum,"

The horse didn't speak and I was happy with the thought that my spell worked.

I communicate telepathically. Be clearer.

"Well, now that's over with, what am I going to use to fight with?"

A sword.

"A sword? No gun, or even a bayonet?"

Would you rather fight with your words? I heard dwarves really like being talked down to.

"You're very sarcastic. I like that about you."

You'll get your sword after your magic training.

"Before we go any further, can you tell me why this "superior force" wants me in the first place? I can't go riding off into the sunset with a unicorn."

Alicorn! Anyway, the reason we want you is because you wield magic. Only the rarest wield it. Have you ever noticed things about you? What color are your eyes?

"Brown,"

Hair?

"Deep red,"

And your complexion?

I put my arms up to my face, studying my skin. "Um, I guess you could say I'm pretty tan. What does this have to do with anything?"

Have you ever heard of anybody with those characteristics? I think not. Magic is only granted to the rarest.

"If only the rarest of people get magic, how do you have it?"

I'm an alicorn by birth. The horse seemingly winked. When a pegasus and unicorn mate, their child is always the species of the father. Well, almost always. You see, both of my parents were impure alicorns. If two alicorns mate, it makes a pure alicorn, one born of impure alicorns, the product of inter-genus breeding. I'm a pure alicorn, a rare subset of an already rare species.

"Jace, are you ready? Were leaving for school in seven minutes."

"Hey Gav, guess what," My brother was about to reply until I shouted, "Devinctionibus perfici: Obliviosus intentiones!"

You said it right. You're catching on. You know you don't have to be as rare as you are to wield magic, in some cases it's hereditary. You are the spawn of kings, the last surviving member of your family. You are, by right, the new king. If you don't save the bloodline, the spot will be filled by a competing family.

"And why should I care?"

Uh... They'll destroy the barrier of magic and reality, throw the world into chaos, claim the Dagger of Energy, and become the dictator of the twelve realms.

"Twelve realms?"

Yes. Now let me finish. You are the last of the Katalayawos, Divian for "of all magic". I am a Divaic wizard, very rare. You though, you are the last wielder of all forms. Magic doesn't always require words. Anyone can wield pseudo-magic. You, though, you have access to not just one, but all of the elder magics.

"And how do I use these elder magics? I want to blow stuff up."

You don't. That is why we need to train, if you haven't been listening.

"What is Nithanteo? Also, what are the other words I've never heard?"

Nithanteo means soul. Essence magic, having access to your mind and body and them working together in unison, ultimately bending the universe to draw things from Jakatilonikataiokalosintikatayodithironivakatithiravatimonotakilicas.

Dumbfounded, I stuttered a measly "Huh?"

The land of infinity. We call it Set.

"Why set? That seems strange."

Set has way too many definitions in the dictionary. Making it a good name for infinity; it's full of ambiguity.

"Well, so can we do this?"

Yes. Use a spell to get your clothes.

I flipped through the book. "Devinctionibus perfici: Accipant oleum gementa. Did I do it right?"

Well, if you want your enemies to cry oil, yes.

My eyes were blurred by black liquid dripping down my face. I held my eyelids shut.

I felt the cold hoof of the horse gently lay on my forehead. The stream cut off and my tears felt thinner.

"Can you teach me how to do that?" I was so shocked while I stared at the alicorn through watery eyes.

In time...

The words stuck in my mind. And no, not because I italicized.

Now go get your clothes, we need to get to It- Wait a second. Where are we? I just jumped from Equidorus.

"The last frontier. A glistening city in... Kansas."

Anticlimactic and sarcastic. You are good. Well, it'll take about eleven Niteo and three Dosinea. That is including an hour to rest my wings and get snacks.

"I don't get your terminology, but what time is it. I want to sound smart."

As of 11/14/2011 it is G12/C1/J16/JA1341/K12. It is the twelfth day of the first half-month, of the sixteenth month, of the one thousand three hundred forty-first year, of the twelfth era. The Danji is nikto. As for the time, it is... N1/DOS3/COR8. Or Dokur-Vik, Niteo-Vik, Dosinea-Keftor, Corduus-Pothri. For those of you who don't understand CTS, 1:38 A.M. But that could be translated to 6:42 A.M.

I must have lost track of time, because I bolted to get my stuff before my parents noticed what I was doing.

I used a spell to pack my bags, but instead of an invisible floating ball, I got a ballerina ball that could fly... I think I said decus instead of caecus. Sometimes clarity is very impolrtant. One time, I said "rose colored glasses", and instead of my friend reveling in optimism, he just got a new pair of magenta sunglasses.

I jumped out the window, as I landed on the floating horse directly below me. "Can we go? I'm getting anxious."

And with my words, the alicorn soared in the sky.

Hey Jace, where did that ballerina hamster ball with wings come from?

"A bit of a magic mishap, nothing much. Best forget about it." I waved it off.

Okay...

(First line break :D)

After we flew for around 7 hours, we were zooming over an island.

"What's this one? I looks a bit more empty than the others."

It's called Corvo. We're going to land and have a picnic.

Have you ever eaten a ham sandwich off of a unicorn's horn? Yes? Oh, I thought it was just me.

We sat on the uninhabited side of the island, on the beach.

"Ich's col oud hair. We shoult uv brot blayketz."

You mind translating?

I swallowed the last bite of chicken leg.

"It is cold out here. We should have brought blankets." I clarified, although I'm not sure why I should clarify stuff with the horse.

The tip of his horn glowed as a piece of meat levitated into his mouth.

"What are you doing? Aren't horses vegetarians?"

Horses, yes. Pegasi, no. You see boy, there is no grass in the sky, just birds, bats, and owls. We evolved to become carnivores. The unicorns still grazed in their infinite fields, with every edible plant thinkable. I am an omnivore, and enjoy the occasional gofi haunch.

"What are gofi? It sounds a bit tropical."

They are quadrupedal herbivores. Most are dark blue, but can range from baby blue to royal purple. They like leeks, cabbage, and carrots. The have short fur and live in Gaylos. They are fairly large, but not as big as the bulls up in Dialo. They also can climb trees. They look like cattle-bear-lion hybrids, having manes like lions, horns like cattle, and a physique of a bear.

"Whoa, I want to cuddle one."

A good idea. If a gofi likes you, he'll grant you a wish.

"Let's go pet these things. I want some money."

Hold your humans, you'll have to become a citizen of Dialo before we go to the tropics of Gaylos. It should take about two days.

"I want cuddle pandas now!" I fake sulked as I crossed my arms and started pouting.

I see through your facade.

Up until then, I didn't really notice how he was sitting. He sat with his front legs at his side and his back legs facing me. His stomach looked so fuzzy. The thin white fur coated his pink skin. He was fat, but in a cute, soft, wanna-touch-your-tummy kind of way. He had a belly button. It wasn't very noticeable, but I could see it right where his naval connected to the ground.

Why so quiet? Why are you staring at my stomach? Are you planning on eating me?

He was going through possibilities of why I was gazing at his stomach, until I spoke up and said, "No, it's just... you have a belly button."

Obviously, you dolt.

"I didn't know. I don't take biology yet, I'm only in eighth grade."

May I ask you a question?

"You just did. Now what is your question?"

There is the sarcasm again... Well, anyway, are you going to eat that Vinta'por shank?

"The what?"

Vinta'por. It means snow doe. Except, it's not like the ones you're used to. The snow does of Gofris have crystalline fur, silver eyes the size of the light dome thingies of Deistiros, and goat horns.

"Do you mean light bulbs?"

I don't know, but they're really weird. How do you make light without Dayno or Disti magic?

"Electricity. Ever heard of it. Also, you told me about Dayno, that's fire, but what's Disti?"

Disti is plasma. Super-hot things. It's the fourth state of matter on Deistiros.

"So, things like lightning?"

Yes, exactly.

"Lightning is electricity."

Lightning is plasma.

"Electricity is plasma."

So this electricity stuff is plasma magic?

"No, it's not magic. We make it. Well, not really. Energy can't be made or destroyed, only changed. Chemical energy in the food you eat becomes potential energy to do work. Potential energy becomes kinetic in order for motion to happen. Kinetic becomes chemical to make the batteries in a remote work. The chemical becomes electrical to send signals through UV, or electromagnetic, waves. That electromagnet becomes electric to turn on the TV. Soon the TV gets hot and creates thermal energy."

What's a TV?

"Nothing, you're hopeless. Now you know how I feel about all this strange magic stuff."

Sarcastic and pessimistic... Oh joy.

"You'd be pessimistic too if everything you knew turned out to be fake..."

I'm a horse. A smelly, ignorant, mass of meat. When your in my situation, hope is essential.

"I wish I could feel what you're going through..."

Maybe you can. You've discovered soul magic.

"I have?"

Remember that book?

I nodded in comprehension.

You summoned it. You had knowledge of the words metaphysicam and libro.

"A book beyond mental ability."

I taught you about magic, but my words did nothing. You thinking that I would make the book appear, caused you to create the book. A bit of a placebo, if you will.

"So how do I use soul magic? Is it like crying mysterious fluids? I'm good at that."

Believe that you can build and destroy. Expel and assimilate. Believe you can pull from infinity and send to the void. Conjoin your mind and body and become one unstoppable force, capable of bending the universe to your whims.

"I don't suppose you have a copy of "Soul Magic for Dummies" lying around..."

I love your sarcasm... Actually, I do. Devinctionibus perfici: Vos iustus feceruntque facite.

He phrased it as a question. He pulled a book out of thin air, his horn straight through the middle.

"Whoa, you were being serious?"

No, you did soul magic again.

"Touche. I'm going to get back a you."

In your nightmares.

I stuck my tongue out at the alicorn. He returned a much more unsettling version, making him look like a monster from a haunted house.

You think it's time we pack up and head out?

"Yeah, lunch break was over like... samdur Dosinea ago."

And in Deistiros that would be?

"Twenty minutes."

Good job.

I climbed on his back, and we rode into the 2:00 P.M. sunlight.

A little while after we started, I fell asleep. I couldn't tell you how, as I was getting horrible altitude sickness and we were going higher than most airplanes.

It might have helped that the flying ballerina ball was directly below us, and it would have caught me if I fell.

Sleep tight.