This is A Very Interesting Title Designed to Catch Your Attention
Your voice is dancing to a familiar melody in the insides of my eyelids. I can feel you beside me, resting peacefully. Your breath is singing to my heart and tearing me apart. Not in a bad way. Never in a bad way.
I used to wonder how touching a star would feel like, as a kid. I never expected that I would ever be in love with one. It is the kind of love that encompasses everything else. It is beautiful. The sheets stick to my skin and I am reminded of your left elbow and how one time you spilled soda on it and did not have any means of wiping it off so you had to pretend it was fine and keep people away from your elbow. I wouldn't have said I didn't enjoy your elbow sticking to my nape, if you asked me.
I can hear the curtains brush against your skin. It pleases me. Your presence alone is enough to get my skin to tingle. Your smile brings a twinkle to my soul. Your laugh shoots a star into my body.
I can smell your beauty. I can smell it everywhere, in my closet, on my sofa, in that spot between the wall and the cabinet you like to hide in. My lungs stroke my heartstrings and I forget how to breathe for a moment. The feeling reminds me of daydreams in the early morning while you're still asleep beside me, daydreams of white veils and church pews. The image lodges itself in my throat and takes the breath away from me, but it is a pleasant kind of temporary suffocation.
I begin to remember. I can picture your mother crying and the bandages around my heart slowly peel off. I am bleeding tears when I open my eyes. I can't seem to stop it. I turn to my side and clutch the space you used to take up. I wish I could stay in that state of dillusionment forever.
I think it is futile, however. It won't do the only thing I have ever wished for for thirteen months, five days and seven hours. It won't return me to the blissful feeling of being in your presence, much like thirteen months, five days and seven hours ago, when you smiled at me like I had all the sunshine in my eyes. It won't.
It won't bring you back.