I thought I had love. I thought I had a family- I thought had someone to comfort me. However this is in past tense, considering I lost everything I thought I had. I had had an almost perfect life. I had never left the comforting embrace of my home, but what did that matter, I had been happy there. But one day, a stranger lured me outdoors, and when I return my home is just ashes. Ashes with nobody inside. Where had my family gone? Where had the people I loved so dearly gone? They were gone to the wind, to the sea, and to the twinkling stars. Never to be seen again.
I discovered that love is not a necessity. I don't need love to live. I have a good job, a car and an apartment. I laugh and cry with myself. I don't need friends either. It all just seems like a lot of work to me. All the disagreements you can have. All the time and effort you have to put in to it. All the sacrifice. And then that person will be cruelly ripped away from you, by death or by some other predicament. You will never see them again.
But I am full of regret. I am not whole. I am not the same person I was before all this happened. I knew it was my fault that they have died. I knew I was to blame for this tragedy. I will never get over this heart wrenching guilt.
Life without love. Is it even worth it? How can I rebuild my pitiful sorrowful state after such a tragedy? Do I even want to? Do I even care anymore? Some parts of me are screaming in pain, telling me daily that I can't do it anymore. But some resilient part of me still exists. The same part that longs for a comforter. The same part that wants a friend. The same part that has me crying today.
When I was younger, I was taught that the Greeks loved a good story which consisted of tragedy and injustice, including heartbreak. The thing is, my story would have appealed to them. I don't allow myself to love or anyone to love me. This isn't a story of a girl that falls in love with a handsome prince. So I may never give myself a happy ending with people and a family I love, but I did not choose this ending, this ending chose me.
A/N This was something that I wrote in English class, liked, and wanted to share