The strange thing about senior year was that it had a tendency to pass by rather quickly. I could have sat in my window watching the passing of time-watching the tree shed leaves then watching the sun rise and fall again- anything to stop the incessant talk of college.

Antonia's late November birthday was more of a haze than it should have been. I was late to her party for the first time in years. When she greeted me at the door, we barely had time to embrace as she was having a heated discussion on the phone simultaneously. She grabbed my present, smiled quickly, and then turned on her heel to continue the conversation.

Her party outfit was nothing less than spectacular, not because it was overwhelmingly expensive, but because it was so simple, and still made her look phenomenal. All it took was a pair of ripped black skinny jeans, black faux leather t-strap pumps, and a white midriff halter-top. It looked like her hair had been in tight curls, but then she'd finger brushed them out to soft waves. Her cheeks, aflame due to the argument with whoever was on the other line, matched her red lips.

"Wow, really? But everybody knew! It was on Facebook, you have to be kidding me."
She stopped yelling brusquely, as if giving the person on the other line a chance to defend himself, or perhaps, just giving herself a second to breathe before she lashed out again.

"Yeah? Whatever." She hung up, and threw her phone on the kitchen counter.

"Is everything okay?" I asked, but I knew all too well that it wasn't, and it wouldn't be.

"He forgot my birthday." She trailed off.

"He?" I was hoping she'd say someone else, like her father or uncle, as horrible as it sounded.

"Ezra."

"Oh."

"I'm so done with his mess."

"His mess? Toni, stop. I don't think I've ever seen you as happy." I was so used to saying these words, as I'd said them to her in almost every relationship she'd had before. I'd probably say them at the conclusion of the next relationship too.

"Listen, Ari." Her eyes saddened, her mouth dropped its artful curve. " I think he's cheating on me."

My heart stopped. My face froze as if I'd been caught in a lie with no way of recovering.

"Why do you think that?" I mumbled.

"Why else would he stop calling? The spark from the beginning just isn't there anymore. He doesn't care like he used to. And he forgot my birthday!" she whined.

"Stop stressing yourself out over him, Antonia." I said reassuringly as I patted her back, "It's your birthday. It's your party. Don't go to that horrible place with all the self-doubt. Stay here, in this moment. Be here, at your party, surrounded by the people who love you. Don't waste the time thinking about someone who won't." I forced a smile onto my face. "Go enjoy your party and worry about this some other time!"

She wiped her eyes, hugged me and disappeared downstairs to the basement where the bulk of the party was happening.

I felt torn. I didn't want to face her. Some selfish part of me believed that the problem she was having in her relationship was in some part my fault. But then I decided the thought was stupid,thinking I was someone important enough to have some influence on Antonia or Ezra.
I sat in her empty living room, on the white suede couch where we'd practiced putting on makeup, and read our first young adult novel when we were younger, feeling as though we'd grown so far apart since those times. Maybe it was a good thing if she felt done with Ezra. If she gave him up, it would probably be easier for me to give him up.
I ran my hands through my hair, and let out a large and freeing sigh. My body was shaking so much that I almost didn't feel the buzz of my phone in my back pocket. One simple text message as always,
"Come outside, please?"

It never took long for my heart to win over my head. My body moved instantly out the side door of Antonia's house, each step magnifying the intensely loud beat of my heart.

He was there, leaning against the streetlight smoking a cigarette.

I steadied my breath, and crossed my arms. "I thought you quit smoking." I said meekly creeping up to the curb where he stood.

"I thought you'd be happy to see me." He replied distantly, still looking straight again. It seemed as if he'd been talking to a stranger. Gone was the comfort and warmth of our friendlier days. Perhaps it was better that way. It must have been easier for him to forgive and forget than it was for me. I could never forget anything.

"I am." I said quietly. I couldn't stop my face from lighting up at the sight of him. My smile was automatic.

He took one long drag. I watched the smoke puff out his nostrils. He wasn't Ezra anymore.

"As soon as she called, I rushed over but I'm not sure what I'm even doing here ." He said, pulling the cigarette slowly from his lips. He flicked off ashes.

"You forgot her birthday, Ezra. To a girl like Antonia, shit like that won't fly. It's basically unforgivable."

He laughed darkly and finished his cigarette. " How could I forget her birthday if she never told me when it was!" he exclaimed angrily.

He pulled another cigarette from the pack with a frustrated shake of the head, but I couldn't help but let out a laugh, then covered my mouth. He looked up at me like he was confused, but his face softened when my laugh continued.

"Really, Ezra? Then this whole thing is ridiculous." I continued to laugh. "Like the horrible plot line of some sitcom on ABC. Really? She never told you when her birthday was? She would be the one to do something like that." I doubled over in laughter. "Oh please, Ezra. You were all doom and gloom over something stupid like that? Stop it." I hid my face in my hands, and when I looked up Ezra was smiling along with me.

"Poor baby, all stressed out!" I came to stand in front of him and snatched the cigarette out of his hand and placed it between my lips. I called him stupid and shook his shoulders as he got out his lighter.

"Don't I look cool smoking, Ezra?" I joked, batting my eyelashes furiously feigning mystery. "They were not joking when they told us all that peer pressure crap in second grade. I look downright dangerous, huh?" He lit my cigarette, and as I inhaled, I instantly began to cough up what felt like my lung.

Ezra erupted with laughter.
"Oh God, this is horrible!" I said between coughs. "My mouth tastes like barbeque charcoal. What the hell?" I kept coughing, and his laughter made me want to laugh.

"But you looked super cool that one minute that you weren't coughing. It was crazy sexy" He said with a sardonic wave of the hand. I punched his shoulder. I tried not to cough up blood. My whole chest felt like it was on fire, but it didn't matter because for the moment, I'd had my good friend back. I made a mental note never to smoke again.

Amidst our laughs, Ezra found time to pull me in for a bear hug. It was as if nothing had happened, and nothing at all had gone awry. He rested his chin on my head, and I coughed out a laugh as my hands went up to his arms, then up to his shoulders.

"I missed this" I confessed with a content sigh, basking in his hold still.

"I missed you." he said, equally as sincere.
I buried my face into his chest to hide the full flush in my cheeks I knew would be developing. He caught on quickly and raised my face to his with his slender fingers. His eyes searched mine, with the question on his mind, no doubt. I pushed away from him.

"So, will you come inside? Make up?" I asked crossing my arms again. It seemed to bring him back to reality. He put both his hands back in his pockets and looked down.

"Oh. . .No. I shouldn't. Regardless of what she didn't tell me, what she did tell me over the phone just now was loud and clear. She doesn't want to see me right now. I'll give her some time. " He looked off to the side and scratched the back of his head.

"Yeah, sounds cool. Good. "I said nervously.
We lingered in the glow of the streetlight for a minute as crickets sounded off all around us, singing the Night's song. Sure, I was a romantic, but I'd almost forgotten the feeling of. . .actual feeling. My stomach was doing summersaults as if I'd just gotten off of a rollercoaster. I felt lightheaded, and I wanted nothing more than to have him touch me again. I felt sick.

"But give her this for me." He said pulling out a dark blue envelope from his back pocket with Toni's name written on it in a nice cursive. He nodded his head as if he'd said something significant, then started towards the train station abruptly.