"Excuse me, Professor,
I'm sorry to disturb, but this
Grade that you have given me
Has me a bit perturbed.

Just listen to me kindly,
Let me give some explanation
Why this grade is quite unfair
And you will change it, no hesitation.

I try, I do try,
But, woe is me;
It's all this dumb
Homework, you see.

I have psychology, biology
And zoology, too,
Philosophy, anatomy
And sociology, to boot.

English and Western Civ
Make it doubly troubling
To get to your fine homework;
And don't forget computing.

On top of homework onslaught,
I do hold a social life,
I have so many friends,
(P.S. I'm looking for a wife).

There's Melanie, Valerie
And Kimberly, too
Cynthia, Monica
And Helena...who?

With all these dates,
I just don't have the time
For inconsequential derivatives
And elemental lines!

In between denominators and numerators
I have some quite essentials.
They're things I can't do without,
They're innate and naturals.

There's bathing, breathing
And definitely sleeping,
Brushing, dressing
And a great need for eating.

Washing and combing
Make it very difficult
To keep my mind on anything,
Especially the postulate.

And so you see, dear Professor,
By these things presented,
That my poor grade has earned
The right to be resented.

And so I ask you plainly
To change it as you may;
I'm sure you've seen my troubles
And will change it right away."

Here I stop and take a sigh
And wonder in my head,
What would he say, would I live
Or be quite dead?

I pick up my report
And drop it in the trash;
The thought was nice,
But I'm just not that rash.

Bargaining for a grade
Is great contemplation,
But I'll never have the
Courage for implementation!


This is a poem I wrote in my busy college days. I actually never took a math class in college, but math has always been my most difficult subject :-)