Girl Hater

It was dark. I hated the dark.

I was alone. I didn't like being alone.

I wanted my Mama. But she wasn't here.

No one was here. No one could hear me.

I got that now.

I could keep crying for them… but nobody was going to come for me.

No one.

No one except him, that is. That man, the horrible horrible man. I don't like him. I don't think he likes me either really. I think that's why he did what he did; why he took me and brought me here, away from my family.

I was just playing happily on the grass in front of the house. A blanket was laid out and my pretty tea set was all nicely arranged so we could have a tea party.

Cora was getting the tea – apple juice – as we weren't allowed to carry hot stuff out to the front. Mama said we could hurt ourselves if we did. And Cara was getting the rest of our guests from the living room. Shaun the Sheep, Baby Annabelle, Rosie the Ragdoll and Mr. Tedsworth.

I could see her from the window, gathering everybody together in her arms. It was going to be great.

Then I was hugged from behind. I thought it was Cora being silly, she was always being silly. Cora's arms were small though, kind of like mine, but this person had huge arms and they were rough too. They pulled me up from the blanket roughly which made me scared. I didn't want to get up and I didn't want to be pulled by anyone like this so I wriggled and tried to get away.

Cora looked at me from the window and she dropped everything. She screamed, even I heard it from out here, and she yelled. She ran from the room, still screaming and yelling. The person squeezed me tighter like they were trying to crush me. I squirmed more and more.

I had to get away.

This was bad.

Bad Bad Bad Bad Bad.

I thought I was almost there, almost away from whoever this was but then a hand came to my face and everything faded. The light, the sounds, everything disappeared.

I awoke and I didn't feel well at all. I felt so tired like I hadn't slept in days. I felt sick in my tummy and in my throat. I felt dizzy like I had been on a roundabout for too long. It was terrible. Worst of all, I was in a dark place.

I never liked the dark and, for some reason, this dark seemed to be the scariest dark of all. It was heavy and clinging, like it was squeezing me. Like that person was in my awful dream.

No. Maybe it wasn't a dream…

I wasn't in my bed. I was somewhere else. I couldn't have been with Mama or Papa because they would not made as dark this, even if it was a new place. And I didn't go to new places without mama or papa.

Where was I? Where was everyone I knew?

I cried. I called. I hoped someone would come and find me.

Now I don't. Because all my crying and calling brings only one person. That man.

The first time, after I woke up, he stormed in, like Papa does when I've been really really bad. The light from the door was so bright and so sudden it blinded me. I covered my wet, stinging eyes. I didn't see the hand before it thwacked my cheek.

I went to howl in pain but the same hand slapped against my mouth and my nose. I couldn't breathe. I couldn't breathe.

He spoke, slow and low, as I tried to move his hand from me.
"Bad behaviour leads to punishment."

He let me go and went.

The next time, he came again. He hit me, harder, but left straight away. No words. Just silence apart from the jangle of a key bashing against metal.

I don't shout anymore. Shouting isn't good.

But the dark isn't so dark no more. Somehow it's gotten lighter. I can't see much more than before as there's nothing much to see.

There's walls. There's floor. There's a bed and there's a door.

I feel so sleepy, sitting quietly in this lightening dark. I don't want to go to sleep though. I'm scared of what may happen if I do. Will I move? Will I stay? Which one would be worse?

I rub my soggy sleeve at my eyes again.

I want to go home.