"You're chicken shit,"



"I'm chicken shit? Because I don't waste my Saturday night hanging out in some old dilapidated building?"

"Its a house,"

"that...is a building"

"whatever, don't change the subject, you're chicken shit."

"pay me,"


"Yeah, make it a bet and your on,"

"fine, but how will we know you spent the whole night there?"

"please, its just some old building, I'll go in, set up a tape recorder, text you guys a pic every hour or so, do the whole...*finger quotes* ghost hunter thing."

Step 1: Look up online ghost hunting gear

Step 2: Try to back out of bet because gear costs a shit ton.

Step 3: Be forced to "nut up" and buy gear, consisting of a camera with infrared, (subset: convince friends you don't need to spend the even bigger shit ton on the full spectrum and night visions and the extra full infrared is insane enough), also buy some radiation detector, a glorified thermometer, and a tape recorder for EVPs.

Step 4: Postpone "this week end" till a month later to get all that shit in the mail as the local superstore doesn't have it all.

Step 5: The night of the bet, try to convince friends to go with you so you aren't talking to yourself all night...without sounding like a chicken shit.

Step 6: fail at step 5

Step 7: Try to sneak group of friends onto large abandoned property without being caught. Just so they know you went in.

Step 8: go in, and hope friends aren't caught leaving, wandering if you'll get your first real scare by a cop telling you to get the Hell out of what is likely someone's private property.

Step 9: explore and find a place to set all this shit up.

"Okay," says Jeff slumping down on an old bed in what he now assumes was an old Bed & Breakfast or small fancy hotel or something as he sets the camera up on a stand he found, "So...captain's log or whatever, I am settled in now, have this camera set up. I'm not one of those fancy ghost hunting show guys I don't have a dozen cameras to set up all over the place, just this one right here and one another I'm going to carry around. They say this place is haunted, and yeah I can see it. I think its an old bed and breakfast or something, going to carry the camera with me, went past a dining room and pretty nice entry way. Its all moth balled and decaying but still pretty nice."


"Second camera, first camera is being left running in the room, should have like twelve hours according to the memory card so, the rest of tonight until dawn easy. As you can see we have some nice wood paneling, places where there clearly used to be pictures on the wall, none of the lights work of course...the presence of light switches tells me this place is younger than I thought...but I honestly don't know when light switches were invented so...whatever. Oh is that a ghost? Nope...looks like tattered rags and; oh shit!"

The camera shakes about as he enters a room, a large black eyed doll sitting on a rocking chair, "Okay, what the fuck...who takes all the other shit and leaves shit like that behind? Fucking heart attack man."

He aims his camcorder at it, "Tonight on Jeff's ghost hunting we have...this spooky ass child sized...black eyed devil doll. Guess when they abandoned this place and took everything but the beds, chairs, a few rugs and other random junk...someone decided to leave behind a giant spooky doll...god damn."

He looks about the dilapidated room, nothing else but a dresser and some random rags on the floor. He opens up the creaking dresser finding some doll clothes.


Jeff stops, "windy outside"


The sound is coming from the floorboards behind.

"Oh please don't tell me..." he turns around and...the doll is still in the chair.

A darkness jolts past his legs making him *shriek* and jump.

"Oh fuck!" he screams as he leaps about.

He takes the camera and plays it back, "what the fuck was that?"

and he sees, a cat.

"What the fuck was a cat doing in here..."

He looks around, the window is closed, the door was closed when he came in, and it had to have been next to the dresser when he came in. He plays back the camcorder from when he came in...its not there.

"Okay," says Jeff, "a ghost cat maybe? Or it was hiding somewhere else when I came in."

Jeff takes a breath and walks out of the room, as he closes the door and aims the camcorder at himself there is a loud *bang* from inside the room. He just stands there a few minutes before opening the door. There is a huge hole in the floor going down to the room under it, no sign of the doll, which he imagines was buried in the rubble.

"Oh shit," says Jeff, "this fucking building really is condemned, shit."

He aims the camcorder at the hole, "Well...as you guys can see the fucking floor just collapsed in the room I was in. I am packing up my shit from the room down the hall and...well...I think if I stay down stairs I...ow!"

Something has hit him in the side of the head, he looks down and sees a paper airplane.

He aims the camcorder at it, "Uh...a paper airplane just attacked me..."

He sets the camcorder down behind him on the floor by the door and picks up the paper airplane, seeing that there is something written on it, but the light from outside is too far away across the hole so he is forced to use the camcorder.

He reads the blood like red letters, [Go to the parlor and take off your pants]

"Seriously," says Jeff, "did you guys set some shit up in here before I got here?"

He aims the camcorder at the hole, "Because either you guys are fucking psycho, or nearly got your asses killed messing around in here."

As Jeff returns to the room the lights flicker.

"What the fuck?" says Jeff as the lights flick on, oddly however his mind is focused more on the spectacle alerting the houses down the hill that someone is up here and calling the cops, utterly convinced his friends took the time to set this up to prank him given how long it took him to get the equipment and get here.

"What the hell," says Jeff as he finds the camcorder he left behind sitting on the floor and the recorder for EVPs is missing, with a folded note in its place.

[Not needed, I can talk to you]

"Very funny," says Jeff as he tosses the note aside, "okay guys you have to still be here so where...are you?"

It dawns on him that this room is down a straight hallway over very creaky wooden beams from the room he was exploring. There is no possible way anyone snuck in here while he was out and something else has his attention. He can still see outside despite the lights being on. He shouldn't be able to do that. Looking out the window there is no lights from the windows on the trees. The room is clearly lit up, but it doesn't go...

He stops and looks at his hands on the windowsill, they are in shadow, he can plainly see a wall, a barrier where the light just stops a few inches from the wall and window. As he peers out the window he can hear a soft feminine *giggling* sound; which disappears as he pulls his head back into the light. He blinks and the lights are gone, back to the inside being illuminated by the moon outside and without his eyes needing to adjust.

He stands there confused, "Okay...I'm breathing in something wacky. Have to be."

He grabs the first camcorder and feels around for the recorder, "Okay...so that really is gone."

He sees the blinking light on the camcorder and decides to play back the footage, if nothing else he'll know when someone snuck in and turned it off and back on to prank him. What he sees however is a woman, a Japanese woman with fairly large breasts and long black hair wearing a long flowing, seethrough white gown. The gown flutters about as though in a wind and even seems to only sparingly interact with the surfaces in the room. As she sits on the bed where Jeff had been only an hour and half before she smiles at the camera. She reminds Jeff of the ghosts in some remakes of Japanese horror movies he had seen. She sits there silent, the only sounds Jeff can make out are clearly from himself down the hall at this time only maybe thirty feet away. In the night vision scope of this camera the figure sits there, legs spread on the edge of the bed. She leans her head down and with a tongue that easily snakes out two feet from her mouth she laps at her own tits through the billowing gown. She turns as though listening to Jeff in the other room, before smiling and leaning down further, snaking out her tongue again and lapping at her own pussy lips. She is clearly physical, not seethrough other than her gown. She licks her lips as she leans over, giving the camera a full upclose view of her tits, and picks up the EVP recorder. Jeff watches wide eyed as her eyes glow bright, the nightvision already makes people look like they have glowing eyes and without color so its hard to make out any other detail on that; however its her mouth opening impossibly wide as she swallows the tape recorder, wrapping her tongue around it and pulling it in as though her tongue were attached deeper inside her than her mouth. Her throat doesn't distort as she apparently swallows it. He watches as the figure spits out two pieces of paper, a folded note which it leans over and sets on the stand, and another which it folds into a paper airplane. It smiles, and vanishes into a dark shadow as it floats up out of frame into the ceiling.

Jeff just sits there watching the recording, watches as that black cat comes into the room and knocks the camcorder off the stand before it runs off somewhere out of sight. As the recording ends he just sits there, with a very confusing for him boner. He doesn't know how to react, he sits there looking at the camcorders, one off, the one he was carrying still on and sets it down next the other one.

"Maybe," he says after a moment, "this was a brothel...horny ghosts...it ate my recorder...well shit...if I posted this on Youtube I'd get a million Fake comments and be accused of hoaxing it no matter where I posted it...damn. Also...when did I close the door?"

He leaves the camcorder sitting there facing the bed as he gets up and walks out of frame. As he reaches the door there is a *knock*

"Oh shit," thinks Jeff as he reaches for the knob, "come on dick...how can I be scared and horny at the same time...don't..."

He stops, staring in horror as a large black fuzzy panther is sitting right there. It pounces knocking him on his back, banging his head against the hard floor board. He barely has time to worry about that however as the large creature is standing over him. Its big yellow eyes looking him right in the eyes before it leans down and bites his shirt. It cuts his shirt like a pair of scissors all the way down.

"Woah...what...the...fuck," he says as it licks his chest, trailing its very not cat like tongue, but soft like a human's across his nipples. He can only lie there and watch as the creature is somehow licking his chest and abdominal hair off, he does trim it as he likes to show off the abs he has worked on. He can't get up, in fact he can't even move, even his arms are paralyzed, he doesn't know if its out of fear or something paranormal.

After licking his torso the large cat just sits on his lap, an intense warmth radiating from it through his pants, despite everything he has an erection straining at his jeans. The creature lays down on him, its weight, warmth, and fuzziness oddly soothing to Jeff, and even more oddly for him arousing. However it doesn't seem to have any more inclinations for that as it seems to be looking around as if guarding him, or making sure nothing else is coming for its prey. Just as Jeff can start to feel his legs and arms again and starts to wiggle under it, the creature looks down at him and exhales a hot breath in his face. He is out cold.


Jeff awakens to the sun streaming in through the window and a pain in the back of his head, "God damn it," he says, "did I seriously knock myself out and dream that weird shit?"

He feels for a bump as he stands up, his cleanly cut shirt hanging off of him, "Uh..."

One of the recorders is still going, he is quick to play them both back, the one still shows the mystery Japanese woman in her lewd display; the other however, he can hear the knock and see himself thrown back out of frame on the floor, but there is no sign of the panther, just a vague darkness that was looming over him. He fast forwards, stopping as something went by. Rewinding it looks like rocks were being thrown into the room at the shadow, only to vanish when they hit it. He can hear growling, like two cats, cats mixed with birds and some other horrible beasts. It goes on for a little while before changing to something like whispers that he can't make out. Then nothing, the shadow fades away and the sun comes out.

He sets the camcorders down and feels his head, "shit...funny...guarded by a cat, and I've always been more of a dog person and...why the fuck and I calm about this shit?!"

He looks around, "A ghost fucking roofied me...probably sucked out my life...essence or whatever...shit...its a fucking...well shit I don't want to say fairy...inhuman or whatever...shit."

He grabs up the equipment and looks around, "Ah fuck...that recorder..."


He stops, "Oh please tell me that's not a K9 unit."

He peeks out the window trying not to be seen looking out for police cars, none to be seen. He walks out the open door and looks into the now well lit and of course still collapsed room. He heads down the stairs towards the front door.

"Well damn," he says, "places looks alot better in daylight, should record this place during the day time and get a real good look at it."

He looks at his equipment, contemplating if he should record over the night, aside from the very going to be believed by even the most hardcore believers ghost stuff as it is way beyond spooky mists and apparitions, its also his proof he was here all night...or...as he imagines his friend Steve claiming that he left a recorder there a few hours and spent the rest messing with the footage on his computer like their little youtube project from a few months earlier...just another reason no one would believe it.


Jeff looks up the sound is coming from outside, "neighbor dog," he says.

He trips on air at the bottom of the steps dropping both camcorders, exclaiming, "shit"

And once more exclaiming "SHIT!" as an invisible force, or forces drag the cameras off across the floor in opposite directions and into holes in the wall.

"What the fuck?!" exclaims Jeff.

The front door opens and a large black German Shepard strolls in.

"Uh...nice dog," says Jeff crawling backwards towards the stairs.

The dog wags its tail and *barks* excitedly.

"okay," says Jeff slowly standing up, "nice dog then...okay..."

The dog turns away from him, front down, rear up, and sets its tail to the side, it looks back and barks at him.

Jeff is stone face, "what the fuck?"

He starts to back up and the dog whimpers.

He looks at the door, "maybe..."

He starts to walk to his right trying to go around it to the open door. The dog *growls* and the door slams shut.

He takes a few steps to his left back behind the animal and it stops growling.

Jeff looks around and the dog *whimpers* again.

"Dog person," says Jeff, "hey...uh...hell hound or whatever...I'm not...into dogs...or cats...so...I'm..."

It *whimpers* louder and wiggles its butt.

"Look," says Jeff, "I'm not into bestiality,"

He unbuckles his pants, sits back on the steps taking his shoes off, his pants, underwear, then putting his shoes back on (it is an old dirty building).

"See," he says standing up, his throbbing erection aimed like a sword straight forward.

The dog smiles panting and *barks*

"Oh no..." says Jeff, who freezes as he feels a cold wind, followed by what feels like a scolding hot tongue roll across his ass cheek.

He jumps forward and looks back, there is a door open he didn't see before, a large bed inside, nicely made. He feels his ass, there is a red mark like a sun burn. He gets down on his knees.

"What the fuck," he says watching the mark fade away, and the sudden realization his cock has slipped into something warm and tight, and gripping him, and his hips are thrusting on their own.

He watches himself in animalistic lust, panting like a beast as he is rapidly fucking this dog's pussy. The sounds it makes however are not those of a bitch but a woman getting her brains fucked out; no words, just the moans and pants of a human woman. Even its eyes seem somewhat human. This pussy however is far from human, its warmer than his girlfriend's ever was, and is massaging his cock shaft as he fucks, like its trying to milk him. It isn't long before he cums. His cock however doesn't go soft, instead it is gripped and he is harder than ever. The dog looks back with pleading eyes and he is back at it, thrusting like a piston into that tight, hot, pussy.

This continues on for some time, his body is covered in sweat, at some point he removed what remained of his shirt. His ass crack feels like a rain forest, he has no idea how long they've been at it. He briefly recalls a warning on Viagra about four hour erections. He is spent, exhausted, more spent than he has ever been, there are shadows creeping across the floor as the sun is low. He collapses on the back of this unnatural beast.

"No more," he whispers, begging his own body which has been acted on its own all day.

He feels the dog's tail elongate and wrap around his waist like a monkey's tail as he hears foot steps behind him.

"Oh shit!" he exclaims imagining his friends coming looking for him and finding him here fucking some stray dog.

He doesn't see anything however, but he does feel something large and furry climb onto his back, wrapping her strong paws around his waist and jabbing at his buttocks with spear like cock. He is too exhausted to resist, and thankfully so drenched in sweat that its like a lube as the monster cock stabs into his anus without mercy, as the beast pounds away at his virgin ass, it hurts a bit, but mostly when he tries to resist. The pounding however does move him inside the female dog distracting him. Before long the invisible beast becomes visible a large black dog, not a breed he recognizes though, like a wolf with a lion's mane.


"Where the fuck is he?" says a blond young woman down the street from the drive to the old building as she tries once again to reach Jeff on his cellphone, "its getting late."

As she walks with red headed girl and another boy they stop at the locked gate.

"Was that there last night?" asks the boy pointing out a sign [Danger Renovations, No Trespassing]

"Shit," says the blond girl, "he could be hurt."

"I am not getting busted for trespassing," says the boy.

"Whatever," says the blond girl climbing the gate and heading up the over grown walk leaving them behind.


The blond girl, known as Sheila opens the double doors to the mansion like house and stops and stares at the spectacle before her. A large black German Shepard lying on the floor, and nearby another, sandy blond German Shepard is being fucked by a large black wolf like dog with a mane. She just stands there a moment, noticing the sandy blond dog has a full erection and is cumming all over the floor from being fucked in the ass.

"Can I help you?" comes a woman's voice from behind Sheila.

She turns to see a very pale Japanese woman with long black hair tied up in a braided ponytail, wearing a very tight business suit, clearly showing off her barely contained ample bust.

"I..." starts Shiela.

The woman looks past her and scowls, "Well...I had to have the floor cleaned off anyway. Looks like a have a new dog."

"S...sorry," says Sheila, "I didn't mean to trespass...we thought this was like...abandoned."

"No," says the woman stepping inside past her, standing between her and the dogs, "It was, I'm new in this town, came by last night to inspect my new property."

"Sorry," says Shiela, "I'll just...wait...this is going to sound odd but...my friend...boyfriend...sort of...was doing this ghost hunting..stay in a haunted house thing...sorry again...last night here and we haven't seen him all day."

"Hmm," says the woman, "sorry...last night when I came by all I saw was this bitch right here...looks like Oscar there claimed him. Sat on the poor thing all night, fucked the bitch's brains out real good today."

The woman has a wicked smile that is creeping Shiela out, "O...kay...well I guess...he chickened out...or ran when he saw your car...if..."

"If I see any man lurking about the property," says the woman oddly emphasizing the word (man), "I'll let him know his girlfriend was looking for him."

"th...thanks," says Shiela backing out of the building as the door closes behind her, not noticing the woman was too far away to have closed it.

She walks off the path a few steps and takes out her phone, she can see through the window the woman patting the female dog's stomach and crossing her arms watching the big dog (knot) and drag off by the ass the poor smaller dog into another room, but it seemed to be panting in pure pleasure rather than whimpering, creeping Sheila out.

She shakes her head and calls Jeff's phone, stopping wide eyed as she can hear it, coming from a window in the basement. She is quick to call the police. However when they arrive, they allowed to search the property, they find the recorder crushed under the collapsed floor, the camcorders and Jeff's phone are all found in a hole in the wall just near the door. The police deduce he stashed them there and ran off when the home owner showed up with her dogs. There are no signs of any violence other than damages to the property they attribute to Jeff.

As the police pack up one officer looks into the field watching the large black dog fucking the smaller sandy blond German Shepard, "god damn," says the officer, "is that a boy dog he's fucking?"

"Yes," says the woman showing them out, "Just some little bitch that came sniffing around last night, guess I have another dog now; can't deny Oscar his little playmates."

As they leave with Shiela the woman says, "I am truly sorry, if I see *your* boyfriend around I'll let the police know."