The voices in my head,

The dark void that inhabits my soul,

Forces that keep me from happiness in order not to be noticed,

Not to let the darkness I try so hard to contain and not to fall into seep out.

I know it can happen, it's happened before,

That feeling of having no control over what I'm feeling,

Losing the last strands of sanity I could latch onto if I was strong enough.

But I wasn't strong enough,

All the strength and energy I had left was just barely enough for a small attempt at a smile when someone mentioned my name,

When someone deigned to acknowledge my existence.

Maybe one day my past will be forgotten,

Maybe one day that one afternoon will be stored away in the back of my mind,

Forgotten like a bad dream is, a while after it's been dreamt.

But it's been years,

And it's still there,

A darkness within me threatening to swallow me whole this time.