She sat there wondering not believing in anything and everything.
She finds herself getting upset over everything around her. Others might blame her teenage hormones for her growing restlessness. But she won't agree with that. Deep down in her heart she knows that her problems are bigger. The only thing is she can't make anyone around her to understand them.
She tried. She tried very hard to make others understand her. But both the parties never did. The worst thing is they though they understood her, her feelings and emotions. But they are wrong.
She lost hope in people. She was easily angered nowadays. She often gives different arguments at different places. So she is definitely not to expect others to understand her.
"Tell me, what is wrong if I decide to end up my school days without boyfriend?" She questioned her classmates who often bullied her for not having boyfriend.
"Tell me, what is wrong if I want to have boyfriend?" She shouted to her mom.
"What is wrong if I don't want to drink wine or beer or anything in those matters in parties" She argued with her bullies in school.
"What is wrong if I drink few times in parties?" She fought with her parents.
She tried to explain her bullies that why she considers herself as Indian. Whilst she tried to explain her parents the reasons she considered herself American.
Of course she has dual citizenship but at times she thought she had zero citizenship.
Her mom often claims that she could share how she feels about anything with her. But when she tries to share the things it always becomes more complicated.
Though she wanted to be the one who will be kissing her boyfriend (though she doesn't have any) in the corridor of the schools she was mesmerized at her mom's narration of her friendly childhood and school friends. Her father was her mom's first love. She secretly hopes for such a committed love in her later years. But she also wanted not to be the one who will be outcast in her class.
She wonders what and who she is.
Her mom cries often nowadays. She knows she is giving her mom tough times. She knows, the small happening she shares with her mom makes her uneasy. She could remember, once she told how near locker her classmate kissed her boyfriend unexpectedly. And her mom ended up telling her how in her village boys and girls never ever dared to shake hands in her school days. And how they have to carry all her books and notebooks all the way home as there were no lockers.
Each time she shares something, her mom gives counter.
Eventually she stopped sharing information with her parents. She didn't tell them when she was forced to take drugs by her bullies.
"Taking drugs is fun" Her bullies told. But she can't agree with them. As an Indian girl, her parents would never be happy if they find out she simply tried drugs, she argued. Forgetting no parents would be happy if their children take illegal drugs irrespective of their citizenship.
She doesn't know what she needs to do. Deep down in her heart she knows not everyone is same, she has to move from the group who bully her for not having boyfriend, and not drinking, and not becoming addict to drugs. Whenever she tried to pull the topic of change of school, her father would start to tell how good that school to her to build a great career.
Weeks passed; months passed she tried to shut herself in her room. She was considered a sociopath in unison by her parents and her bullies.
She never trusted horoscopes. She even laughed when she heard that her parents were married after seeing horoscope match. She too has one of her own.
Till today she didn't trust how someone could be able to predict one's future by seeing horoscope.
But hear, she reads the solution for her problem disbelievingly. When her parents decided to change her school, she was surprised. She didn't know what to make out of it. Changing her parents mind is tough task. Who did that? She wanted to know. The answer was horoscope.
Her mom gave the online link and credentials of particular reputed horoscope magazine and asked her to check out the answer herself. There in one column; there her mom's question about her daughter's worrisome behavior appeared. Her mom asked what is wrong with her daughter.
The answer stated: "There is nothing wrong with your daughter. There are some happenings in her current school, which she can't agree with nor can escape from. Change the school. She will become normal. "
Her eyes filled with tear. Whether due to angry of relief she doesn't know. Her mom thought something was wrong with her. She was angered due to that but she felt relief as she somehow got the solution in action which she herself found long time back.
She browsed for the details of the answerer. He seems to be an older person. Though he is in India he seems to be having relatives all over U.S. He didn't charge for the horoscope calculations.
She gave a thought, maybe he got the idea from his U.S relatives whose kids might be having the same kind of issues or maybe he is really very good in horoscope calculations. But what surprised her was that wise astrologer seems to cope up with generation gaps, and distance. He doesn't seem to think that he would be not aware of her problems.
If one person who sits thousands and thousand miles away, who has generations and generations of gap can claim that he can find the solution for her problems, Then why can't she? Why can't she cop with her duality. She is young enough to cope. She felt energized to face her new school and new friends.
"Befriending the Bad Boy" by LovelyFizz
Katherine(Katy) Colton has always been in love with her childhood best-only-friend Mason James but when she finally finds the courage to confess he rejects and humiliates her in front of the whole school leaving her doomed to be an outcast. Although Katy now believes is time for a new start and the moment she sets eyes on Ryder Jacob, she is determined to befriend this bad boy