FIVE YEARS EARLIER
"Hang on, Sam, just a little longer, we're almost there."
Samantha clung onto Tristan's neck, their heads bobbing up and down from each pull of his breaststroke. How he had convinced her to do this was beyond her. She'd never even touched Tristen before, and now only the thin wet fabric of her bathing suit separated them from being skin to skin as he swam them to shore. Maybe it was guilt that had made her agree. Guilt over believing every bad thing she'd ever heard about him since middle school. Or maybe it was because the thought of making it back by means of the tree branch made her bottom ache… but if she was being honest with herself, being this close to Tristan Montgomery made her feel alive. He did something to her, something exciting and nerve wracking. But it wasn't just that, he made her think, he challenged her every thought, and she loved it.
As they approached the small rocky landing she set her feet on the ground, making the rest of the ten or so feet to shore on her own. Tristan was right beside her, his tan back glistening from the faint light of the moon. When they'd made it a few yards from the water, Tristan sat down hard on the rocky beach. Long wisps of his hair clung to his forehead and he pushed them back with one hand. He then leaned back, using a large rock as a pillow and looked up at the stars.
But he said nothing, just laid back, looking into the sky. Samantha stood beside him, her arms wrapped around her middle even though the night was so warm she wasn't cold at all. She thought about going back to the cabin, back to her best friend where dry clothes waited, but for for some reason, she didn't want it to. She didn't want this night to end- not yet anyway.
She glanced down at the spot beside him, knowing it was a bad idea, but finally picked an area to sit anyway. She looked up in the sky, taking in the millions of stars that were normally invisible.
"This is my favorite," he finally said.
She turned to look at him, puzzled by this new side of him she'd been too blind to see. "What is?"
"This. The seclusion. The quiet… I can actually hear myself think."
"And what are you thinking about?" She laid her head beside his. Too close. Not touching, but close enough that the pounding in her heart increase just a little bit.
"Not much." But the way he said it, with the heaviness in his voice, she knew it was the opposite. Tristan Montgomery was thinking about a lot, she only wished she knew what it was.
She turned back to the sky, where the night was so dark it offered a narrow patch of seclusion, but she said nothing at all for a good ten minutes. It wasn't awkward though, even though you'd think it would be, laying next to the boy she'd hated for the past five years. She couldn't figure it out, because sometimes she felt uncomfortable with Steven, and they'd been friends for nearly four years. She played with a rock with her fingers. Rubbing the soft edges against her palm. Maybe Tristan was affecting her more than she cared to admit, maybe for the first time in her life, she was enjoying herself without the worry of tomorrow.
Tristan finally turned to her, adjusting himself sideways on the rock until he faced her. As if they laid on a bed, instead of the beach of the lake they'd just crawled out of. "You have a good vibe about you, Sammie Smiles. You relax me, and that doesn't happen very often."
Her stomach tightened. "I relax you?" She reluctantly turned her head, both hating and loving the affect he had on her. "Really?"
"Yeah." The corner of his mouth lifted, but he didn't say anything else, he just laid there, so close she could feel his breath on her face.
She turned back to the sky, needing to put some distance between her and the boy she wasn't sure if she still hated anymore. She needed more than that though, she needed to get up, to go back to the cabin, and put herself to bed. But she couldn't, she couldn't convince her body to move no matter how hard she tried. No matter how loud her internal voice yelled, she couldn't do move. Even though she knew she should, even though no good ever came of girls who sat too close to Tristen Montgomery. Because she knew that If she did, if she got up and walked back to the cabin, this moment would never come again.
"I have the same problem as you," She finally uttered, her voice uneven and quiet. "Well, with a boy..."
She hesitated for a moment, her fingers playing a little more franticly with the rocks. She wasn't even sure why she felt the need to talk about Steven, but she did. "He wants to date me, I just don't know what to tell him. All of our friends expect for us to get together, I mean, he's so persuasive- even I expect us to end up together some days..." She turned to Tristan, too curious about his reaction to keep the distance any longer. "But at the same time, I don't know what to say."
His brows furrowed, and he reached out to brush a strand of hair back behind her ear. Like it was something he did all the time, like it wasn't the most intimate thing she'd ever felt in her life. "Do you like him?"
She swallowed, because a tight ball of something was suddenly clogging her throat. "Sometimes I do, and sometimes I don't."
"Why's that?"
"Because," she shook her head, suddenly unsure why she was confessing all this. "Because he's my best friend. He's been there through everything. I just…"
"You don't like him like that."
She bit her lip, wondering how he knew what she was going to say before she did. "Yeah... I guess that's it."
"Don't sell yourself short, Sammie Smiles. Don't settle for anything less than what you want." He ran his thumb across her chin, touching her in such a comfortable way you'd think they were friends for years. "Tell him the truth."
She shook her head. "I can't. I don't want to ruin our relationship."
"So you'd rather give up on what you want to make him happy?"
"No, that's not what I'm saying."
"Than what are you saying?"
"I just don't know what to say."
"Tell him..." His eyes trailed down her face, stopping at her lips. "That you met another guy. A guy who's trying damn hard to be a gentleman right now."
He met her eyes then, as though trying to read her thoughts. . "Have you ever been kissed before, Samantha?"
She turned away, to shocked by the turn in conversation to get her mind to focus. "Why does that matter?"
"Because, I need to know."
"Why?"
"Because." He touched her face gently with his fingertips, easing her face toward him again. "If this is your first time, I want to make it memorable."
Her chest rose and and fell with each breath. She was sure it was visible, but there was no point in trying to hide it.
He smiled. "You have no idea, do you?"
"No idea about what?"
He pushed himself to his elbow. "How God damned pretty you are?"
She covered her face, wanting to hide away with embarrassment, but he reached out softly and brushed her hands aside. "You're beautiful, Samantha, but I think what amazes me most is the fact that you don't know it."
He leaned over, his forearm baring all his weight. "I normally don't ask, I normally don't have to, but I'm trying damned hard to keep my promise. I want to kiss you Samantha." His mouth moved slowly toward hers. "Now's your chance to say no."
She looked up into his eyes, her heart pounding, but no matter what she did, no matter how hard she tried to make her lips form the words, she couldn't do it. She couldn't say no. She wanted Tristan to kiss her, even though an hour earlier she would've been horrified by the thought. But in this moment, right now, it seemed like she couldn't live without it.
His lips moved closer, her silence inviting him in, telling him it was okay, that he could take the thing she'd built up to fairytale proportions, because this moment was perfect.
His mouth settled upon hers, his lips warm, soft, and full. But he didn't move at all after that, he stayed there, perfectly still, and so did she. Their breaths mingled together, both hard and soft breathes. Breaths that were full of excitement and tension, and that made every nerve in her body abundantly aware of his every move.
It was erotic, invigorating, and made her whole stomach come alive with tiny flutters. Just the simple act of breathing the same air as someone else. When she breathed out, he seemed to suck it in, and shen he breathed out, she did the same.
When his lips finally moved, her body melted slightly, like she'd been frozen, too afraid to do anything but breathe for fear she'd wake up, but his lips were like a warm fire, slowly warming her from the inside out. He kissed her bottom lip, pulling it into his mouth slightly before letting it go. "Are you okay?" he whispered.
Because God damn it he was being a gentleman. He was being everything she never thought he could be. He was being everything she always wanted but never knew it until now. She nodded, her grip on the rocks at her side loosening.
He smiled against her mouth and took both her hands, relaxing them with his own. "Relax," he whispered, then he slowly moved her hands until he laced them up around his neck. "Hold on to me."
She felt so silly, not knowing at all what to do, but he didn't seem bothered at all. He kissed her bottom lip again, pulling a little bit harder until she opened her mouth. His lips were soft, full, and not anything like she thought they would be. His tongue entered her mouth, touching hers gently with the tip, as though he coaxed her to do the same. He felt so wonderful, tasted like warmth and wintermint gum, and she couldn't resist kissing him back.
He gripped her head on both sides when her tongue touched his, growling in the back of his throat as his body shifted on top of hers. She may have been inexperienced, but she knew the reaction was a good one, she also knew his reaction was caused by her, and that made her feel more powerful than she'd ever felt in her life. His weight sank into her, anchoring her body to this very spot. His kiss grew deeper, more urgent, as his tongue pushing farther into her mouth, pulling out feelings she never even knew existed.
She couldn't think anymore, his mouth was all encompassing: his lips, soft and firm at the same time, his teeth, occasional clashing against hers, and his tongue, softer than any material she'd ever felt in her life.
She was kissing her best friends brother, really kissing him without holding anything back and the thought never entered her mind until the sounds of laughter and crunching leaves sounded behind them.
She pushed at his chest, scrabbling to sit as fast as she could then whipping around. The girls from across the lake were making their way through the trees, and weren't hiding the fact that they'd seen them. Samantha pulled in a breath, and squeezed her eyes shut. The girls muffled their giggles, but the crunch of the ground at their feet indicated they were continuing on their way.
What would have happened if that hadden't come along? How far would things have gone if no one was there to stop them? Samant sat forward, wrapping her arms around her thighs to rest her chin on her knees.
She felt Tristan move beside her. His arm brushing her leg as he pulled himself to sit.
He cleared his throat. "You okay?"
She nodded, but her mind kept rolling with thankfulness that it hadn't been Renee who'd come to find them. What would she have said had her best friend found her kissing her brother?. "Yeah. You?"
"Yeah." he said. His voice low and textured.
She took a deep breath, trying to come up with an answer for what their kiss meant. She was too inexperienced to know what was expected after a kiss like that. Too inexperienced to know if it always felt like that. If it was always so mind consuming and passionate. All she knew was that she'd kissed her bestfriends brother, something she never would have expected to happen in a million years. But that wasn't the worst of it. What bothered her most, was that she didn't want it to be the last.
Tristan stood then, offering his hand and pulling her up beside him. She wobbled slightly, and he steadied her at the small of her back. "We should get going," he said softly, exerting the slightest amount of pressure at her back. As though he inadvertently pulled her toward him. As though he didn't want to leave as much as she didn't. "Before I get you into trouble."
She looked up, knowing he was right but wishing he wasn't. If she stayed out her much longer she knew something else would happen. Though what scared her most was that she wanted it to. She reluctantly moved away from him, taking all her concentration to walk toward the dock. She fetched her towel from the edge, where she'd dropped it before jumping into the water, and Tristan waited. But when she turned around, the red striped towel clutched at her chest, she didn't see the boy she hated. She saw Tristan. A guy who everyone wanted, and who was misunderstood by the masses. And the first boy who ever said she was beautiful.
They walked back to the cabin in silence, but it was a difference this time. Because under the surface of silence was something else. A shared secret, and a kiss she would remember for all eternity.
The porch light was glowing bright as they approached the cabin, exactly the way it had been an hour ago when they'd left, but so much had changed since then, and there was no going back.
Tristen walked up the steps to the porch, pausing at the back door before he opened it. As though waiting for something to happen, for her to stop him and tell him she wasn't ready to go back, but she didn't. He turned around then, his mouth lifted in the smile she'd seen a thousand times and pulled the door open. "Thanks for coming out with me tonight, Sammie Smiles."
She nodded, not knowing what else to say, and walked into the great room.
He followed in behind her, taking a little longer than necessary to lock the door. He then leaned against it, as though waiting for something.
She chewed on her inner cheek, suddenly intimidated and uncomfortable. For whatever his body had thawed inside her out there by the lake was frozen solid again the minute they walked through that door. He finally pushed himself away from the wall, dragging his feet slightly made his way to his room in the basement. "Night, Sammie," he said then, pulling the door shut quietly behind him.
Samantha climbed the stairs to the loft five minutes later, not allowing herself to think about what just transpired between them She took extra efforts to be quiet as she grabbed her things, then went to the bathroom to change from her wet suit and get ready for bed. But when she climbed onto the mattress beside her best friend, Renee promptly turned around to face her. Her expression groggy and tired. "What time is it?" she asked, her voice full of gravel from sleep.
"Almost ten," Samantha whispered.
Renee kept her eyes closed, but her lips transformed in a smile that didn't quite look happy. "Those girls from the lake came over tonight."
Samatha's throat went dry, and the beating of her heart could be felt in her ears.
Renee rolled over to the nightstand to grab a red and white soup can from the table. " They brought me soup." She nodded, the motion shaking the mattress slightly. "Chicken noodle." She studied the label, tracing the words with her fingertip. "Do you want to guess how long it took them to ask about Tristan?"
Samantha's heart squeezed and tears sprung to her eyes. A thousand excuses for what she'd done rushed to her head, but she knew none of them were good enough. She'd kissed him willingly, and the only reason she'd stopped was because those girls had interrupted them.
"Do you think they don't know?" Renee asked. "That they think I'm so stupid I don't realize they're trying to get to my brother?" She placed the can back on the end table, the frustration and emotions oozing out of her skin. Her voice was harsh and broken from being sick all week, but there was something else there too. She was defeated.
She closed her eyes, sandwiching her hands together under her pillow. "At least I have you. The only person I can trust. The one person who hates my brother as much as I do that I don't have to worry."
Renee turned on her hip and switched off the light before laying back down. She pulled the covers up to her chin and yawned. "Night, Sam."
"Night." Samantha whispered, her heart hammering her her chest with the secret she held. She flipped over, facing the stairs that would take her back to Tristan, her back to the best friend she'd just betrayed, and a tear slipped down her cheek.
"I love you," Renee said sleepily beside her.
Samantha swallowed, heart broken tears choking her throat. "I love you too."