In The Universe's Eye.

I've been stung and bitten many times,
retreated into my mind and a corner
no one could find, nothing could
touch - grazed the darkness with an
unprecedent tenderness.

Sometimes thoughts crawl, sometimes
they spiral into webs so tightly
knotted they're impossible to unravel
with tired hands, and all these thoughts
leave marks too visible to trained eyes.

I think of those minds, strained and
grey from birth, or those that stray
along the way, are they really here?
What makes them who they are? Is it the
love or hate that paints their bodies?

I'm trying hard, listen, I'm trying,
along the way I've realized, I'm always
trying, reaching for those moments when
pretending tastes sweeter than self awareness,
those moments when I hit pause and die inside.

When the blue covering my skin begins
to show I sigh, how many times do I have
to fall into a routine of checking every
corner for the sight? Was it scary when
you realized it never actually goes away?

You never finish understanding the cracks around
your own home, many moments to stare and
give stories to strangers not really interested
in knowing you at all, and yet you keep holding
hands with stars, only to let go with a smile.

That's part of life, I've been told, but
I'm stubborn, I refuse with a bite and
walk with thorns around my fists, I'm small
within an existence that's been heavy since
the beginning, I've known never to hold on.

Where was I going? I trace my thoughts
with clumsy fingers, sadly familiar with
the way my brain cries and my heart carves
a hole in my chest - oh, yes, I need to
remember how to be alive, human, to exist.

Laugh, if you want, I've been witness to this pathetic
sight constantly all my life, but I see you smirk, you
don't think that amounts to much, want to compare?
I clash brightly with the shape and shade of your scars,
we are a terrifying wound in the universe's eye.