Through the haze of disapproval
I starve myself

Waking around,
Stuffing my face in stealth

Not possessing the courage
to throw it all up

A never-ending cycle
In which I am stuck

Scrambling around
Fasting for days

A desperate measure
To feel somewhat okay

I want to lose more weight
what else should I not state?

I should go and get help
I don't want to deal with myself

So young and so set in my ways
Recovery pops in but never stays

I may be at a higher weight
More fuel for my self-hate

I will never be small enough
"Boo-hoo, your life is so tough!"

I feel like an attention-seeking bitch
"Haha, see her fat jiggle and twitch!"

I am not worthy of getting better
"Starving herself? Psh, let her!"

"She could stand to lose a few pounds,"
Yes, until I stop looking like a clown

This is nobody's fault but mine,
Be patient; I am running out of time

Sooner or later I will be dead
Nothing else for me to dread