When do you stop including your sister

When asked about your siblings

When do you stop thinking 'what if'

In the middle of the night

When does the guilt stop

Even though you did nothing wrong

When does that heavy feeling stop

When you were happy just a second ago

When does the sorrow stop silencing a sentence

When you are half-way of saying it

It hits me,

In the middle of a class,

When I'm laughing with my friends,

Or when I lay my head down to sleep

When does the sudden panic attacks stop

When you lock yourself in the bathroom

When does the memory of a sister

Stop hurting this much