Chapter One

Minnesota, 1832

The sky above the village was spotted with twinkling stars and it looked like a velvet cover adorned with diamonds. The forest in the distance was quiet and sleepy, and only the crickets and fireflies disturbed the perfect silence and peace of that summer night. However, the young woman who stood on the balcony of a villa, hidden behind a big flowery bush did not enjoy or even notice that beauty. Unrest and worries have been bothering her and usurping her thoughts in the past few months, ever since she became Mrs. Wilkinson

She will never forget that horrible day, that day of her humiliation and disappointment. She remembered how excited she was before her wedding, how much she liked her fiancé before he took her to wife, and she smiled sarcastically to herself. How stupid she was! She thought James was an attractive and charming young man, she even thanked her father for finding such a beautiful husband for her! Her heart was pounding like crazy of excitement as she was walking along the aisle toward the man who'd soon become her husband... Everything was beautiful, just like in a fairytale, she stood in the church as a princess, dressed in white, feeling butterflies in her stomach, believing that James was her prince charming. Until the first wedding night came and turned her life into hell.

She remembered how she prepared herself for that night... She did not stay too long at the reception and left the party quite early. She wanted to bathe and make her as beautiful as possible for her husband, to steal his heart and seduce him, and she headed to her chambers with that plan on her mind. While her maid was filling the brass tub with hot water, Madeleine took off her crinoline and corset which squeezed her round, firm breasts. She was soon standing naked in front of the mirror, pleased with what she could see. She was indeed beautiful and many wanted her. But she remained chaste, keeping herself for her future husband... For James... She took combs and hairpins from her hair and let her auburn hair fall along her back as a fiery waterfall. She looked at herself once again and smiled, and her pearly white teeth peeped between her lips. James won't be able to resist her, she thought.

She dropped herself into the bat and let the water caress and relax her. The maid washed her long hair and applied jasmine perfume on it. Thirty minutes later, Madeleine stood up and out of the tub, sweeping her sumptuous body with linen cloths. The maid dubbed her body with rosy water and then took the used cloths, her wedding gown and the tub out of the bedroom. Madeleine combed her auburn hair in front of the mirror, still contended with what she was seeing. When she was sure that she did her best, she wrapped herself with a yellow silky kimono from China, the present she got from him, from the man who'd soon take away her virginity... Finally, Madeleine thought gullibly that evening.

Indeed, she was waiting for this night for far too long. She was almost twenty and she could not wait any longer. Her sisters and friends already had children, but she, the most beautiful of them all, could not marry for so long... Although she was looking forward to it ever since she was sixteen... But no man could ever attract her, until she met James. When she met him, she instantly knew that this was the man she can love, that this was the man worthy of her. He was tall, handsome, and his smile was charming, his eyes blue and clear, his manners impeccable. He was the only son of his quite rich father, and was a perfect opportunity for her, a daughter of the local physician and a village school teacher.

They were betrothed for five months before they wed, and for Madeleine, that was a torture! She wanted to kiss with James, to feel his hands on her, to place her own hands on him as well, but he always remained a perfect gentleman. He would only kiss her hand and cast lusty glances at her, and never even touched her... That day in the church, at their wedding, they kissed for the first time!

She sat on the bed in her silky kimono and lifter her long, spindly legs onto the mattress. How strange that kiss felt! It felt as if they had no idea what they were supposed to do! She was somewhat disappointed with that shy and even cold kiss, because she had expected so much from it. But, as excited as she was, it was easy for her to explain that disappointing kiss away with awkwardness. They were in the church, after all, before God's face and more than fifty people! That was not the place or time to exchange REAL tenderness, Madeleine hoped.

The girl stroke her breasts and thighs over the silk of her kimono. She shivered at the thought of what was going to happen that night, and her heart pounded in excitement. She was ready! Ready to become a woman, to finally learn that ultimate secret of love! It was late, past ten o'clock, and the candles in her room were fading away slowly. Where was James, Madeleine wondered. What takes him so long? She could hear the distant noise of the reception, some girls and boys laughed in the garden below her balcony, and cheerful voices were singing in the dining room.

She was still gently stroking her thighs and belly. No-one had ever touched her, she thought. Long time ago, she let one youth kiss her mouth, when they both were still fifteen- or sixteen-year old children, and later she kissed the priest's son, but they were both drunk. Both these kisses were awkward because they had no experience or skill. They were so young! Apart from that, she was never caressed, never touched... She sighed as she stoke her breasts again... She was looking so forward to James's visiting her that night.

One hour later, James stormed into her bedroom. It was dark, but he was nonetheless able to see the contours of a naked female body wrapped into a yellow silky kimono and lying on the big bed. He lurched towards the bed and sat on him as if he was falling from the sky. Madeleine was startled, but her lack of experience with men again deceived her. She thought that this was the result of his long felt and counteracted lust for her. He could also not wait any longer, she concluded. James leaned toward her and grinned. "You should take that off, it's too expensive to be torn," he sad and stretched his hand toward her, as if he wanted to rip her kimono to pieced. Madeleine could feel the nasty smell of wine mixed with some cheap beer coming from his direction and her stomach suddenly lurched. He was drunk as a skunk!

As she hesitated to open her kimono, he grabbed the belt of it and stripped her in one second. Then he rolled over across the bed to her, still wearing his boots and clothes. His eyes were glowing with lust as he looked at the perfect pearly skin of her breasts and small, fiery bush between her legs. She instinctively covered her crotch with her hands, suddenly realizing that the things were not at all going as she had imagined.

James was sitting on her thighs and she was unable to move. He grabbed her hands and forced them aside. With no warning or consideration, he grabbed her crotch. She felt his fingers inside her and a painful wave crashed against her. She groaned of pain as he forced his fingers into her intact womanhood. He grabbed one of her breasts with the other hand and squeezed it among his fingers. Suddenly, Madeleine wanted to free herself out of this bed and run away from that barbarian. She tried to push him aside or roll him over from herself, but drunk James would not budge.

He grinned again at the helplessness of her attempts to free herself. "I have never even imagined that you'd be so wild in bed," he said sarcastically and forced his fingers into her even more fiercely than before. She screamed in pain and hot shame, too proud, too insulted to ask him to stop or beg for mercy.

James spread her legs and plunged into her mercilessly. She had a feeling as if someone had stabbed a hot blade into her body. She knew that it would hurt, but she never expected the pain to be as great, as if someone ripped her womb with knives. Nailed down to the bed by the weight of her body, she whined and moaned under him, but he did not care. He was taking what was legally his, too drunk to even care for her virginity.

"You're hurting me, James... Please stop," she cried. "Please stop, it hurts so terribly!" she begged, but he wasn't listening. Aroused as a beast in his alcohol-caused delirium, he was deaf and blind to everything. He kept hammering her crotch wildly, hurting her over and over again.

When she could no longer bear the terrible pain she felt, she raised her hand toward his face and tried to scratch him. She had to rescue herself from him, as she thought she would die if he plunged into her once again. However, her attempt to scratch his face only made him even more violent, so he slapped her and threw her out of the bed onto the stone floor. Before she was even capable of crawling away and hide, of disappearing from that room, he was again on top of her. He grabbed her hair and pulled it, ignoring her painful scream.

"You bitch!" he growled as he pulled her hair and forced her face towards himself. "But I know how to handle your breed! And I will tame you, you'll crawl and squeal before me!"

Her head was aching, but he did not care for the pain he was inflicting. But she was not going to show him just how much his attacks hurt her. He can kill her, he can cut her to pieces, but she won't ever let him break her.

"Never!" she replied. "I'll never crawl before you! NEVER!"

Her defiant look and even more defiant words enraged him and he slapped her again. She almost fainted and fell hard to the floor. He used her weakness and grabbed her breast. His teeth bit her nipple roughly and she screamed like a wounded animal.

"What's wrong, you suddenly don't like it rough?" James asked, grinning drunkenly through his sadistic madness. He didn't even notice that her nipple was bleeding at the spot where his teeth ripped her delicate, white skin.

She could not help but trying to defend herself, but trying to flee from him. But he was stronger, and her desperate attempts to free herself stirred his madness even more. James punched her in her face for a couple of times, lifted her head by pulling her hair and made her stand up. She was almost unconscious and could not control her body any longer. He turned her and forced her to lie down on her stomach. Then he raped her from behind, but fortunately, Madeleine became numb as she fainted from pain. She cannot remember anything that followed.

Hours later she woke up. It was bright daylight outside. Her body ached and she could barely move. She was alone in her bedroom, she realized as she slowly gathered her senses. Along her thighs and on her belly she could see stains of dried blood... Her blood... Her arms were smeared with reddish blue stains, and her head felt like a huge swelled bubble. She didn't dare touch it.

Apart from her, there was no-one present, and she was too humiliated to call for the maid. She crawled out of bed somehow, incapable of sitting, let alone walking, and looked herself in the mirror. Her face was indeed swelled, her lip was cut and dried blood covered her chin. Her eyes were. Her cut lip was extremely painful and huge, and her entire face was malformed. Madeleine crawled back to bed and hid herself under the sheets. She wanted to die and never again see even another day...

Madeleine could not get up for the entire day, not even aware of whether she was awake or asleep. She was in agony, thousands of bells rang in her head, her vision was blurred and every movement caused another wave of pain. The maid once asked her if she can help her, but Madeleine threw her out and told her that she needed nothing from anyone. She covered her face with her sheet so that the girl cannot see how her husband humiliated her last night.

Later that evening James abruptly entered her room. He was just back from very successful hunting, and he was, clearly, in an excellent mood. Victorious smile made his face even more cynical, and his white teeth shined dangerously.

"I must thank you for that fiery night, my wife. What a nice surprise for me! Thank you for that pleasure, my dear," she heard his voice as he leaned toward her. "I thought you were one of those shy and decent... It's true, red-haired are harlots..."

He then pulled the sheets aside and she hid her face in her palms. James touched one big and purple stain on her milky white thigh with his gloved hand.

"Don't be shy now, my little harlot," he leaned towards her even closer. "Be happy to have married a man who can understand and fulfill your needs," he added and burst into laughter at his own wit. To her fortune, he took a couple of steps back from the bad and said, "I hope you won't miss me tonight. I will be at Drake's, but if you should happen to need my dick, you can let me know already..." Having said that, James left her bedroom, laughing loudly at his own joke.

Madeleine didn't even notice that bitter tears run down her cheeks as she was remembering that night. She still felt equally humiliated, after nine months, she still felt that terrible pain and humiliation whenever she remembered what happened that night.

She was ill for some ten days afterwards, in fever, which released her from her obligation to please him in bed as his wife. However, she was not released from the hell of her marriage yet. As soon as her fever subsided and her wounds healed, as soon as her body was back into its old shape and look, James again demanded obligation of her marital duties from her. After having experienced what she did, Madeleine was smarter the next time. She didn't resist him, didn't bite him or scratched him. She would just lie down peacefully under him as if she were asleep, as if she were dead, as if he wasn't even there. It was still painful and uncomfortable, but at least it was bearable, and James didn't hit her again. It took some ten minutes to satisfy his appetite, and he immediately rolled to the other side of the bed, snoring, as soon as he finished with her. It never even occurred to him that she was ready to pluck out his eyes right there and then.

As fascinated as she was with him before the wedding, even so more disgusted she was with him afterwards. He was not only a boorish thug in bed, but also had many other bad sides apart from that. He was always trying to impress other people with everything he could buy with his father's wealth and they couldn't. He was constantly drunk and gambled as there was no tomorrow. He also maltreated the servants and even innocent hounds. When others were present, he treated her kindly as a madly-in-love husband, but when they were alone, he used every opportunity to insult her and treat her like she was indeed a harlot.

She was still cold and motionless in bed, to avoid being beaten from him again, and that soon became boring for him. Her passive rejection got on his nerves and he started insulting her as he was taking her and to threaten her with "taming" if she didn't start to show some "loveliness" toward her husband. She stubbornly refused to respond. He was insulting her, slapping her, humiliating her and treated her as trash, but she never moaned again, she never let one tear roll down from her eyes. She only cried when no-one was around to see or hear her.

Four months after the wedding she had to protect an old servant from her husband's rage. The old Marvin, who was working for the family for more than seventy years was late with his task. James did not acknowledged his age as a reason sufficient enough to explain his slow walk, and her husband took a whip and hit the old servant really hard. Madeleine ran out of the kitchen and stood between James and his victim.

"Let him go!" she said. "You'll kill him!"

"That's what I want! For what could I need that sack of old bones?" James asked and flicked the whip toward her. "If you stay there, you could receive the punishment he deserved, I don't care, Madeleine!"

Luckily, Marvin's son, pretty big and robust carpenter from the village, who had just repaired the roof of the villa, heard the noise on his way out and decided to take a look. As soon as he understood what was going on, he grabbed Madeleine and his father, hid them in the kitchen and slammed James once with his fist, knocking him down without any explanation. James was brought into his room unconsciousness and no-one even wanted to know how he was. Not even the family doctor, who was appalled by what James did to his wife on the wedding night and refused to ever help him or his family again.

Madeleine decided to write a letter to her brother and ask for his help. She could no longer bear this kind of life and she was afraid that she would have to kill James to save her own life. She had to leave before that happens, but she had nowhere to go. She would never escape without one's help. And her brother David was her last hope. She wrote him in the letter that she could be dead by the next year unless he helped her escape... Anywhere, as far from James as possible. "I would rather live in a cave, forever alone and childless, than being accused and sentenced to death for slaughtering my husband!" she wrote.

David answered in an awkward manner. He was obviously afraid of the possibility that his letter should end up in the hands of his brother-in-law, so he decided to answer her request indirectly. "Don't be afraid, my little sister, I am well and kicking. This country is huge, I couldn't make to your wedding, but I am surely going to visit Wilkinson's estate soon! It's another pearl in this huge land which I must see before I leave... I am leaving, Madeleine... I will tell you all about it when we see again." Madeleine thought she understood his message perfectly and started to hope. She also started going to church and pray again. David would help her! He would take her somewhere far away from here! Wonderful!

Days and weeks gone by, but David did not visit her, nor did he wrote. The situation in her marriage became a little better, because James spent most of his evenings drinking and gambling or cheating on his wife with some cheap girls, and she was usually left alone by him. She did enjoy her loneliness, but that didn't diminish her wish to escape, quite the contrary. After every sexual attack of his, her anger would double and thus her determination to leave before someone, most probably she, commits a murder.

As time went by, her hope in her brother's help decreased. There was no-one there to help her. She was all alone and incapable of fleeing from that sadistic beast. She was still standing near that bloomy bush on the balcony of the beautiful, white, big villa, not even noticing the beauty around herself, still miserable and humiliated beyond imagination. She still only wanted to die and was sorry that she had to be born at all.

Having realized that she was torturing her soul with traumatic memories in vain in this sleepless night, Madeleine went back into her room and to bed. She started to cry over her miserable life, her helplessness and bleeding wounds on her soul.