Why can't I feel the right way?

I've never been just right,

I always feel too strong or too little,

But nothing feels the same all of the sudden.

I'm open and new and scared.

All of these new ideas in my head;

All of these new voices whispering to me.

Why am I so different?

What's wrong with me?

Why can no one see how much I'm hurting?

How am I supposed to feel?

My thoughts are haunting me.

All of the problems I cause,

All of the heartache I bring,

Why can't I be someone else?

Why can't I be someone braver?

Why can't I pull the trigger?

Why can't I use the knife?

Oh, that's right.

I'm too scared…

I wish I could go back.

I wish I could feel what I used too;

Nothing at all.

Too numb to care.

Too numb to feel.

But that went away and left me bare.

I was always wanted to be different.

I always wanted to feel more.

Now I just wish I couldn't feel at all.

- A