Chapter 1: Well, do I?
'ello, mates! What's occuring? You're probably reading this wondering 'o the 'ell I am. Doesn't really matter but for the sake of individuality, just call me Punklad! Cool name, innit? Anyways, I moved here to the USA in order to go on a one man crusade to "punkify" it. While my homeland is filled with punks like myself, thing is, with Theresa May in charge, I worry that we may need to spread out in order to fuck the establishment in the arse! Also, since a mate of mine named Peter (well, 'e's not really a mate, since 'is hobbies are sick as fuck and 'e used to work at a McDonalds, but we 'ave the same dealer) ended up escaping from a looney bin, something tells me that the police will be after 'im and be after me by association. Plus, I 'ave a shitload of drugs in my 'ouse so imagine what would 'appen if the police find that. Fuck that shit, I'm out!
It's really annoying, innit? The man trying to 'ave a go at you! Well, that's why I moved 'ere. Problem is, this shithole's got more political problems than my 'omeland. Worse thing is, THEY GOT RID OF FUCKING NET NEUTRALITY! WHAT A BUNCH OF WANKERS! Well, love to stay and chat but I got an establishment to tear down before it becomes a bloody totalitarian regime worse than the fucking commies!