Be the Angel You Need

Every life has a purpose, a goal for their existence and an objective they must fulfill in their time upon the earth. From the moment of conception there is a plan that is laid out for you, people you must meet; disasters that might be averted by your simple presence here upon the earth. Every life you come into contact with has somehow been affected by you, however small that moment of contact may be in the scheme of your day. How is one to know what the effect of the smile you gave to the grumpy cashier may have had upon her life? Maybe she had plans to shoot herself that night and your smile made her decide to give life another chance. This may seem like an extreme example and yet it takes very little imagination to believe that such may be the case. Conversely if one had returned her ill temper in equal measure no doubt her original plan of self-destruction would have come to fruition.

Every human being has one set of eyes, metaphorically speaking, with which to see the world. As such we can only truly see how other lives affect us, all too often forgetting how our life may affect another. Although each of us may remember the angels in our lives - the teacher who gave us a second chance, the man who showed up beside us when we were going to be mugged, the stranger who fixed our tire, or even the friend who held us as we cried - we all too often miss our chance to be that same angel to another person. As a severe anaphylactic allergy patient, I have been close enough to death the emergency medical technicians thought they were going to lose me. As such I can say, speaking from my experience courting the embrace of death, that when I am sitting in the ambulance or the speeding car that is taking me to the emergency room, there comes a moment when I have realized this may be the end. In this moment my life may have reached its end. This could be my last car ride and this could be my last breath. Pain filled my body a burning entity that runs like fire in my veins and fights to find my heart. My body is enveloped in pain and between the coughs and gasps for breathe I could not help but scream. Despite the pain I am only half cognizant of my body and my mind remains curiously detached. Then I have thought not of what I have done in your life but what I have left incomplete. By such an analysis I do not mean the places I have never seen or the dreams I never fulfilled. Rather you remember all the times I should have said I love you. I saw the older lady whose stories I impatiently dismissed in my attempt to hurry to my next task and the child whose tears I did not attempt to dry. These are the things I regret. We all have moments where we find ourselves behaving in ways that we would not be proud to acknowledge. By some weird quirk of the human brain we believe it will be these moments that haunt us as we die. In their way, they do, the thing we forget are those moments in which we neglected to be an angel haunt us in equal measure. It is not just every time we stole a trivial item we remember; it's every time we neglected to give an item away. It's not just the harsh words we may have said that haunt us, but every time we forgot to give a compliment.

Every life has a purpose and a goal for existence, the actions we may take and the choices we may pursue affect the world around us in a very intimate way. Every human being is born with the chance to be an angel or a devil; our paths are ours to choose. We make this choice, not just once but every moment we are allowed to live upon the earth. Our eyes can only see the world once, yet our actions affect the world around us in ways we are incapable of comprehending. This I believe.