I'm not good at remembering your face

So it's gonna fade, it'll fade away

And I wasn't good at remembering your name

But it rarely came up, so it's all the same

I remember when our fingers used to touch

And I'm talking about I️t so sentimental now

Its strange cause you were just another fling

Or so I thought, so I thought when we first met

But now that I can't occupy the space between your sheets

I guess I'm looking at I️t differently

I don't get attached, don't get attached

I know the rules, I know the rules, I do

It's usually someone else tripping up, not me

It's usually someone else getting entangled emotionally

And usually I don't let them hold my hand

And usually I cringe when they keep kissing me kissing me kissing me

Tell me that they've been missing me missing me missing me

So I don't understand why I'm so hung up on you

Trying to see other people but it's not working out and I feel like crying and it's so strange

When we hung out it's not like you were the only one, the only one I was seeing

But now, seeing anyone else seems pointless

But now, sleeping with others has been fruitless

Celibacy has never been my thing since eighteen

But I guess it's where I'm at now since my regular routine isn't working

And I can't talk about I️t, can't talk about I️t

Cause no one gets why I'm feeling so confused

And I can't explain what's going on or what I'm feeling

But I hate talking anyway

Why do I want stupid things

Like your hand in mine or your arms around me

You're the only person that I've ever been able to actually sleep next to

Before I could never sleep with someone wrapped around me

I don't know, I don't know what's so different

And from past experience I know I can't trust my judgement

So none of I️t was probably worth much anyways

But my stupid brain has decided to treasure those days

I guess

Cause they're stuck in my head

And I️t doesn't make sense

And the timing is all wrong and I don't even want that kind of thing

So it's incredibly strange that I'm hurting

That I'm yearning


Something with you

Something I can't have

And I know that but I guess it's taking a while to sink in since

I don't want to see anyone, sleep with anyone else

This hasn't happened before

I've been in love, but I've never only wanted one person

I've never really been the monogamous type

I guess I never got all of the hype

And I still don't but

If I don't want anyone else I guess that I don't know

And I don't want any of these feelings but for now I guess they're here to stay so

I'm sorry

I know you probably don't miss me

And I know you're really busy

But I guess I'm here to say that if you're ever ready

And you want me

I'll be waiting