We hung out with Trent for about an hour on Sunday. His eyes were shining when he looked at Jade. It was kind of painful to watch him radiate so much affection and admiration towards someone whose heart belongs to someone else.
When Jade asked him what he thought of Dino and his crew, Trent shrugged and said that he didn't think they were the nicest guys around. Jade gave me a conspiratorial wink when he wasn't looking.
Jade said that she agreed and asked him if he'd like to help us teach them a lesson for behaving like jerks all the time. He said yes, just like we anticipated. Trent would've probably followed her to the ends of the earth if she'd asked him.
He told us that his house wasn't located that far from where I live and asked us if we wanted to tag along. We agreed to it and sat hunched over his computer, while he showed off his technological expertise. It was kind of like watching a magician at work. Jade wrote down the vultures' locker combinations in her notebook.
"Aren't you gonna get in trouble for this?" Jade asked him before we left, arranging her features in a fake display of concern.
"They'll never find out that I'm the one who did it, trust me" Trent responded, and for once in his life he sounded confident.
When we said that we had to leave, he asked us if we were hungry, suggesting that we go to McDonalds. He offered to pay for our meals. Jade told a white lie and said that we had homework to attend to, which isn't far from the truth.
I'm sitting at a bench in my neighborhood, waiting for Jade to arrive. We're going to ride our bikes to school together. This is going to be one hell of an exciting day. We've agreed to excuse ourselves and pretend that nature calls, placing Electra's feces inside the vultures' lockers while they're all in class. I just hope that we'll be able to dodge the janitor.
The thought of getting expelled if we get caught has visited me a couple of times, but I honestly don't think that it will happen. I mean, Jade blackmailed Principal DeBoer into letting us off the hook for ditching class. She could use the shameful secret that we discovered about him and Mrs. Kinkel, against him once again.
The only thing that scares me, is that Dino & Co might suspect that we're the ones who did it and retaliate. I trust Jade to get us out of. She's so clever.
Even though I had fun throwing all of those magazines into the grill last Sunday, anxiety still gnawed at the pit of my stomach the entire time Jade and I hung out. It didn't even stop when we met up with the socially awkward Trent.
Jade kept saying that Duce is an idiot for assuming that someone is automatically gay if they don't try to dry-hump every appealing member of the opposite sex. But little does Jade know that Duce was 50% right when he called me a dyke. I play for both teams. But I don't want to tell Jade, since I fear that she might react in a negative way and ditch me. Sure, she's pretty open-minded compared to the majority of our peers, but she does have firm opinions about certain things. I don't know what her stance is on bisexuality. I'm not sure if I want to know.
When I confided in a friend back in sixth grade about my sexual orientation, she looked at me as if I'd just told her that I enjoy downing shots of phlegm. That's not the worst part of it though. She told a group of girls in our grade about it and soon the entire school knew that I have the ability of being attracted to both genders. A couple of guys one or two grades above me, threatened to beat me up when they found out about my revelation. Homophobia at its finest. Since most of them lived in my neighborhood and the middle-school that I attended wasn't located far from home, the principal assigned one of the teachers the task of walking me to and from school for about a month or so, until it blew over. It made me feel like a freak.
I can't risk being discarded by Jade. She's not like that chick I was friends with in sixth grade. We mainly hung out because neither of us really fit in anywhere. She wasn't a rebel who prided herself on being different and unique, like Jade, though. Mindy, the friend in question, used to be home-schooled by Christian parents. So it's no wonder why she outed the, "sinful" me to a couple of girls that she wasn't affiliated with.
Even if Jade doesn't have anything against homosexuals, she might not want to be close friends with one, fearing that I might develop a crush on her. It's better to just keep this to myself, even though it sucks that I can't reveal such an essential fact about myself to my closest friend.
I haven't had a crush on a girl for a couple of years now though. I'm currently infatuated with a male vulture. A guy named Rhyse who was in the same grade as Jade in middle-school. He was never directly mean and derisive towards her, but he hung out with a couple of the vultures. Rhyse is not my only crush though. I usually crush on several people at a time. I'm able to see the beauty in a lot of people. It's too bad it can't be the other way around. I sigh.
I envy Jade for being immune to having a crush on someone. I wish I could be like her. I bet she's never cried a river due to having unreciprocated feelings for someone.
Anyway, it's not like Jade confides in me about everything either. She's pretty secretive about her family. She only asks me to come over when her family members aren't around. The way she acts, you'd think her parents are running an illegal business from home. Like tricking poor people into selling their organs or something like that.
The few times that Jade has talked about her parents, she's always referred to them as, "Cruella" and, "The Psycho"
When Jade arrives, she rummages through her schoolbag and fishes out a Ziploc bag containing waste product from Electra's digestive tract, holding it up for me to see. I feel disgust mingled with excitement at the sight of it.
"So we're really gonna do this, huh?" I giggle and marvel at how great her idea is, rising to my feet.
"Yup" Jade grins from ear to ear. She's wearing a black top with the words, "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good" printed across her chest. Of course she owns a garment with a quote by the Weasley twins, like the dedicated Potterhead that she is.
"A bit of a give-away, isn't it?" I nod at the white letters on her top, "What if they suspect something?"
"Oh please, Nine & Co are a bunch of simple-minded Neanderthals. They won't be connecting any dots" Jade snorts. We start sniggering.
I battle back the dread that keeps trying to talk me out of this idea throughout my entire third-period class. I've memorized Nine & Co's locker combinations.
We've agreed that I should take care of Nine's and Jeremiah's lockers, since their lockers belong to the same locker section as mine. Chloe already dealt with Besnik's locker while our second-period lesson was in session.
I eventually do as we planned and excuse myself to go to the toilet. The janitor is drifting the hallways with his back to me. I spin Nine's locker combination and yank open the locker. I have to be quick. I grab a pair of plastic gloves from my bag and put them on hastily. Then I proceed to smearing Electra's poop all over his books and the inner walls of the locker. I do the same thing to Jeremiah's, my heart galloping in my chest.
I exchange a mischievous smirk with Chloe when I get back, slumping down on the chair next to her
"The only thing that would make this moment complete is if we could screech out of here like Thelma and Louise, in a Ferrari" Chloe writes to me in her notebook.
"Thelma and Louise are old though. And so outdated by now. How about screeching out of here like Poison Ivy and Harley Quinn instead?" I write back.
"Touché" Chloe whispers, before writing, "You get to be Poison Ivy and drive Rose Bud, since this was all your idea"
I feel more like the mentally unstable Harley Quinn, but I don't tell her that.
When we haul ourselves to the last lesson of the day, English, I feel really lethargic and allow myself to momentarily space out when my buttocks hit the chair. I enjoy not paying any attention to or thinking about anything at all for a couple of minutes, until Chloe suddenly nudges me and jolts me out of my stupor. She gestures towards the students who are sitting in the row in front of us and whispers excitedly, "Did you hear? They're all saying that Dino punched Kim A in the head seven times"
"What!?" I frown. How ironic that I would allow myself to space out while everyone around me is talking about the guy who's occupying my mind like 24/7. I immediately eavesdrop on a conversation that Sarah and Adrienne are having.
"He started crying when Mr. Mckennon tried to grab his bike away from him in the bicycle rack" Sarah says.
I'm shocked beyond words. I thought Dino was immune to shedding tears. He seems so unbreakable. Apart from that, he's always so cheerful, playful and easy-going. It's like he doesn't take anything seriously. I have a hard time imagining him getting riled up over something so trivial. But then again, he is pretty immature.
I'm sitting on the edge of my bed, my face buried in my hands. Guilt, despair and humiliation consumes me. I feel like an uninhibited beast. A monster, if you will. I bet they're all calling me a psycho behind my back.
I hate that tears welled up in my eyes when that goon McKennon started chasing after me. He almost caught me when I was in the process of unlocking my bike from bike rack. My heart was galloping in my chest like never before. He made me look weak in front of my mates. Fucking idiot.
My phone suddenly beeps. It's a text message from Lacey. It says, "U ok? What happened?"
I feel a twinge of affection towards her. Lacey is sweet and tender-hearted. Not loud, self-centered and arrogant, like most popular chicks. Her vulnerable and gentle aura makes you want to protect her from all of the ugliness in the world.
But she's quite popular among guys, especially older guys. So I don't really think I stand a chance with her. I might give it a shot anyway, even though the thought of being rejected scares me. But she's not the only attractive girl in the world, after all.
I'm surprised that she's willing to talk to me after what I did. I thought all of the females at school would avoid me like the plague from now on. I bet the rumor of me going full-psycho has spread like wildfire by now. I reply, "Kim A pissed me off big time. We fought over the only available computer in the Computer Lab. She was like a dog with a bone. Wouldn't relent"
My right knuckles throb with pain. Wouldn't it be ironic if it turns out that I've fractured my hand by punching her? She hurt me back without even intending to, just by having an ultra-hard skull.
I open the fridge and drink milk straight from the cartoon, even though it drives my parents nuts. That reminds me, I'm going to have to tell them when they get home. Sure, I could just wait until the principal gives them a call and notifies them about my antics, but finding it out that way would probably make them rage harder.
Everything feels hopeless. Why the fuck did I have to lose my temper like that? The rage engulfed me, emptying my mind of everything. And why the fuck did Kim have to be so damn annoying and persistent? Like a buzzing mosquito that you can't get rid of unless you smack it with a fly swatter. I wanted to just put that bitch in her place.
I think the reason why I lost control of myself, is because I was pissed off before Kim even started insisting upon getting to use the only available computer before me. When I went to get my stuff before the English lesson started, I was met by a nightmarish sight. Someone had smeared poop all over my books and the inner walls of the locker. The smell made bile rise at the back of my throat. The culprit did the same thing to Besnik's and Jeremiah's lockers.
I bet my bottom dollar Seth Garner is the one who did it. The dickhead who came to Dykeman's defense, like the annoying white-knight that he is. I bet he just wants to see for himself if she really is a cunt, hoping that she's straight, so that he can get into her pants. I can't for the life of me comprehend why anyone would be attracted to Dykeman. She's so dull and jittery as hell. Sometimes I want to just grab her by the shoulders, shake her and yell, "Chill out, we're not in a warzone! Relax!" but she might be Seth's type. Why else would he defend her?
He's sadly and hilariously mistaken if he thinks he's got a chance of getting together with Dykeman. She told a previously home-schooled chick named Mindy that she likes girls, back in middle-school. Mindy, like the nobody that she was, didn't waste the golden opportunity of gaining attention and approval from the popular chicks in our grade by outing Dykeman. I always got the impression that Mindy and Dykeman didn't really enjoy each other's company, but mainly hung out because they didn't belong to any clique.
Anyway, Dykeman never denied the rumors. So I suppose she really is a cunt then.
I don't know how I feel about homosexuals in general, honestly. Sure, the thought of two dudes fooling around is nausea-inducing beyond words. But two topless lesbians making out, is fun to watch if they're hot. I feel sorry for gay people. I mean, they'll go straight to hell for having sex with the only gender they're attracted to. It's not like they can just rewire their brains and start fucking members of the opposite sex. Just like I wouldn't be able to tell myself, "I'm gonna start being a fag now" and hook up with guys. No way.
So what are they going to do? Abstain from sex for all eternity? The thought of never getting laid is terrifying. I'm horny like 24/7. I could never resign myself to a lifetime of celibacy, even if I was gay and risked burning in hell for satisfying my carnal urges.
Anyway, I'm going to have something nightmarish in store for Seth, retaliating for the stunt he pulled on us.
I walk back to my room, running my uninjured hand through my hair. How much damage have I done to my reputation? A new message from Lacey awaits me, "I'm here if u need to talk 3"
A smile tugs at the corners of my lips. I'm sure as hell not gonna bare my soul and start talking about my feelings, like some sort of sissy. But I appreciate her concern. It doesn't seem like she's just out to get the juicy details. It seems like she actually cares about how I'm doing.
I sit down on the edge of the bed again. My eyes fly to the laptop that's placed on my nightstand. I don't have the guts to check Facebook. Not yet, anyway.
"Wanna meet up?" I text Lacey. I pace back and forth for a couple of minutes, waiting for her to reply. My gaze keeps landing on the laptop. Fuck it, let's just get this over with.
I log onto Facebook, dread growing like weed. The first thing I see in my newsfeed is a photo of a plate containing Pljeskavica, from a Bosnian page that uploads photos of Bosnian dishes, that my Dad follows. I agreed to accept my parents' friend requests on two conditions; that they don't like my pictures or God forbid comment on them. I'm not a baby, for fuck's sake. Yet they keep gushing over me. Well, I have a feeling that's about to end soon for a while, at least.
Several of my mates have sent me messages, asking for my version of the story and wondering why I haven't replied to their text messages. I really don't feel like giving them detailed descriptions of what went down in the Computer Lab right now. I check my contacts list and notice that all of Kim A's closest friends have unfriended me. I have over 1000 friends on Facebook, so whatever. I log out, thinking that it could've been worse. I expected updates from acquaintances, telling everyone that I'm an unhinged beast who should be put in a straightjacket, to have ended up in my newsfeed.
"Where?" Lacey finally responds to my text. About time.
"Outside my apartment. Let's take a walk around my neighborhood" I write back, excited that she agreed to meet up with me.
I chose this location with the intention of showing her off to my mates. I mean, she's quite the catch, let's be honest. I hope the boys are playing soccer on the field that's located next to the playground in my neighborhood. They might think we're an item if they see us hanging out together outside of school.
Lacey looks like a bombshell when she arrives. She's wearing a white leather jacket, an ultra-short denim skirt and black thigh high boots with stiletto heels. She gives me that coy smile of hers that drives me wild. I drape my arm over her shoulders, signaling to everyone that she's mine. Well, about to be, hopefully.
She smells like vanilla and apple shampoo. I can't believe I'm walking around with my arm slung over the shoulders of a knock-out like Lacey. I suppose something good came out of that awful incident, after all.
I take us to the soccer field. Alejandro, Besnik, Jeremiah and a couple of other guys from the neighborhood are there playing soccer, just as I expected
"Heyyy, why haven't you answered our texts?" Besnik asks, bumping his clenched fist into mine. Bro fist.
"Don't you see that he's been busy?" Jeremiah says with an impish grin, his eyes resting on Lacey.
"Well, I see whom he's been busy with. But busy doing what, exactly?" Besnik winks at him, clearly alluding to sex.
Lacey starts giggling and squeals, "Stop it!" in that way girls do when they're embarrassed.
We leave the guys to it. I can feel their eyes on us, as we walk away. I enjoy the envy they most likely feel towards me for walking around the place with Lacey by my side. It makes me feel like a winner in their eyes.
Lacey and I take a seat at a bench in the deserted playground.
"Doesn't it hurt?" Lacey says, examining my aching and bruised hand with her soft hands. Her touch makes my stomach flutter.
"You get used to it" I shrug, putting up a front and acting as if I'm used to getting into physical altercations. My phone beeps, totally ruining the moment. It's a message from my dad.
"Get home. We have things to talk about. The principal called" I read silently. He always ends his messages with, "/Dad" as if I couldn't recognize his number on my contacts list.
No way. I'm staying out for as long as Lacey wants.
"You should be proud. A lot of chicks would die to be in your place, on this bench right here next to me" I tell her with a playful grin, but I'm only half-joking. I want her to know that I'm desired by plenty of girls and that she should consider me a catch in return. But then again, I haven't actually met any of the chicks that desire me, in real life. About four-hundred girls that I've talked to on badoo have liked the pictures on my profile page. I've had conversations with like 700 girls in total though, so about three-hundred girls that I've talked to haven't liked my pictures. That sort of takes the joy and pride out of having so many likes. I wonder why those remaining three-hundred girls didn't like my pictures, from time to time. It bothers me, truth be told. But I don't tell Lacey any of this, of course.
"If you say so" Lacey giggles, "Did one of those girls just message you?"
"Maybe" I smirk, trying to sound mysterious, "But none of those chicks even compare to you" my attraction towards her swallows my cockiness.
Lacey smiles in a shy manner and starts playing with her hair. Does she even know how adorable she is? She's an enchanting mixture between cute and sexy.
My phone starts ringing. I check the caller ID, feeling a twinge of irritation. It's Dad, of course. I turn it off.
"Mr. Popular" Lacey smiles in a teasing manner.
"Guess what makes me so popular among them?" I wink.
"Can you give me a hint at least?" Lacey giggles.
"Let's just say that if someone made a movie about me, it would have a Parental Advisory label" I grin. Okay, that was a total lie. But I'm hoping to lose my V-card before my mates do. God forbid I'm the last one of them to lose it. I'm turning fifteen in December. I want to lose it before I turn sixteen, at least.
Lacey and I chat, flirt and joke around until the streetlamps are switched on.
A tirade ensues as soon as I enter our apartment. Dad goes on about how I'm going to fuck up my future if I repeat what I did to Kim. Mom is more concerned about my bruised hand than what I did to Kim though, making me promise her to visit the school nurse tomorrow. It blows over quickly though. They're never cross with me for long.
The reprimanding I just had to sit through, doesn't take the edge off the euphoria I feel for getting to spend one-on-one time with Lacey though. I put my earbuds into my ears and play the song, "It Girl" by Jason Derulo on my phone, splayed across my bed. I conjure up a bunch of imaginary scenarios in my head as I lay there. One of them involves Lacey and I, getting to know each other better… on this bed.
"Let's do this again sometime" I text Lacey before turning off the light.
"4 sure" she texts back. I fall asleep with a smile on my face.