Author note:Hello,readers. Here is another poem I have written. In Poets Unite,the poetry group I'm in,our topic for this week is anorexia. This poem is based on a time I considered self starvation at the age of 15 due to my ex boyfriend,Leo. I cried while writing this poem as it hit home for me. Without further ado,here is my poem.
If there was one word people called me,
It was the word beautiful.
Did I believe any of those people?
Only for a small moment.
One day,I became a mess.
All thanks to an ex lover.
Who compared my body.
To another girl he was involved with.
His words planted a seed.
Into my head taking root.
Making me a combination.
Of hurt and unhappy with myself.
I wasn't a Barbie doll.
Nor was I a thin twig.
But,deep down,I felt empty.
As if something was missing from my life.
All I desired was to be loved.
Inside and outside by a male.
But no,I couldn't even love myself.
All thanks to my degrading ex.
Overtime,I consider starvation.
I wanted to feel beautiful.
I wanted to feel safe inside myself.
I wanted a man to love me no matter what.
I wanted nothing to do with food.
Nothing at all.
It was my ex's fault for causing me to become this insecure.
He broke me and he couldn't fix me.
I loathed my own body.
Loathed my own appearance.
I loathed every single thing about myself.
All because of him.
He's just like the others who've made fun of me.
In the distant past.
All for looking different.
I shouldn't even be surprised at all.
Eventually,someone reaches out to me.
Tells me that I shouldn't give in.
To the voices in my head.
That command me to starve myself.
This particular person loves me.
Inside and outside.
No matter what I look like.
No matter what I have.
He makes me feel safe.
Sometimes,I skip meals or don't eat much.
But otherwise,I consider his words.
Of love and acceptance and hold on to them dearly.
Author note 2:and that is the end. Stay tuned for more future content.