I was sitting in a quiet spot at a bar. A beautiful woman walked by my table.
"Are you alone?" she said.
"I was—until you came by!"
She smiled. "I'm glad to hear that."
She sat next to me. While sitting, she slipped her shoes off. Noticing me staring at her feet, she said, "Do you mind me doing that?"
"No, not at all. I was just thinking: You remind me of this girl I know. She also liked to go barefooted."
"Is she your girlfriend?"
"No, just a good friend."
"Well, perhaps I can also be a good friend."
"Yes, perhaps you can."
"What are you drinking?"
She motioned to the barman. "Two scotch's, please." He nodded.
A minute later, he served our drinks.
"To a new friendship," she said.
We saluted and drank.
"I'm Ron, by the way."
"Pleased to meet you. I'm Elaine."
We shook hands.
"Come here often," she asked.
"Nope. But tonight, I'm celebrating."
"I just won $1000 in a poker match!"
"I was hoping I could perhaps share it with a lady."
"Will I fit the bill?"
"You sure will!"
We finished off our drinks and ordered another round.
My memory after this isn't too good!
My next memory was being awaken by the bartender.
"Hey, buddy, it's time to go home, now. I'm closing up."
I rubbed my hungover head and looked at my watch; it was 1:57AM. Then I looked around. He and I were the only ones in the bar.
"Where's the girl?"
"There was a girl with me. Her name was. . . Eileen? No, Elaine. She even took her shoes off, while sitting!"
He shook his head. "Buddy, you must've been really tight! Pay your bill and go home!"
I took out my wallet and looked at it; it was empty!
"I had $1000 in there; now it's gone! She stole my money!"
"I told you, you were alone!"
I tried to attack him, but he pulled out a gun!
"If you're gonna cause trouble, I'm calling the cops!"
I backed away. "No, it's OK. I can't pay you, though. I've only got some change."
"Never mind, just get outa here. And don't ever come back anymore!"
I went home and slept it off.
The next morning, I paid a visit to Barefoot Jenny, at her office.
"Hi, Ron, how are you doing?"
"Better than last night!"
She smiled. "How'd it go?"
"Worked like a charm; she rolled me!"
"Now, let's see how long it takes for the counterfeit money to be spread around!"
"Yep! Lt Kirschenbaum says he's ready and waiting!"
"I'll bet he is!"
"Oh, here's a little something for you."
She gave me $200 cash!
"This isn't fake, is it?"
"Now, would I do something like that to you, Ron?"
"Just making sure! Oh, by the way, the girl took her shoes off, at the table."
"Did she, now?"
"But your feet are nicer than hers!"
She propped them on her desk. "That's the correct answer, Ron!"
We laughed. I kissed her and left. I spent the rest of the day sleeping!